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No, I wouldn't. I think everyone should do what is best for them - and it was definitely best for me to have sex with my husband before I married him. I can respect that some people want to wait until marriage - but I wouldn't get into a relationship with them. We just wouldn't be compatible.
But what I find more worrisome is that you are hooking up with people that you don't like and you think this is some sort of indicator about how fulfilling intimacy can be. Stop hooking up with people you don't like.
I can respect that some people want to wait until marriage
I can't.
I mean, don't get me wrong. I wouldn't criticize someone for it unless asked my opinion. And it's more than admirable for a person (man or woman) to want to wait until they're in a committed relationship. In fact, I think it's just about the best way to be.
But legal marriage? You want a stranger to give you the green light to have sex with the one you love? I don't get it.
I mean, don't get me wrong. I wouldn't criticize someone for it unless asked my opinion. And it's more than admirable for a person (man or woman) to want to wait until they're in a committed relationship. In fact, I think it's just about the best way to be.
But legal marriage? You want a stranger to give you the green light to have sex with the one you love? I don't get it.
I didn't say that I got it - just that I can respect a person for making their own choice. It doesn't make sense to me either.
I didn't say that I got it - just that I can respect a person for making their own choice. It doesn't make sense to me either.
I can't
No, honestly, I can respect a person for making this choice in terms of not seeing it as "wrong". But I can't respect it in terms of seeing it as better or even equal.
And see..I would NOT date a man like that FOR THE EXACT SAME REASONS. I am confident and secure about what I want from a relationship. I don't care who doesnt like my opinion. I am not a *****, nor do I sleep around. Trust me, as a woman its easy to get sex. I spend LOTS of time not getting it when im single because I prefer to be in a relationship. However, I just dont believe in the whole' no sex before marriage thing' because of some of the things I talked about in a prior post.
I dont believe in running around humping everything that moves. But, if you are in a committed relationship and you are starting to think long term, I disagree that people should NOT have sex just because of some religious.... You know what..I wont go there. However, Im tired of people thinking like they are 'above' others also because they arent having sex.
Not calling out any specific person here..just saying. But yeah get off that holier than thou pedestal real quick. Those types are the worst ones when you go picking through their closets. Lots of other skeletons may fall out.
If you feel no sex before marriage is the best choice for you..then do it. If others dont wish to do it..then they shouldnt.
If you don't care what (I or) others think, then you don't need to argue a long-winded point to me. Most people already agree with you.
That's funny it's been made out to be a joke far as I've ever seen it, not just a 'really bad idea.' I didn't say it wasn't an important part of life but the way some of these people talk it's like seriously what if they did find out the person wasn't compatible or knowledgeable enough sexually -- they're going to dump the person? LOL. Which is why I don't buy it when people say 'well relationship isn't all about sex...." Well apparently it is & that what it boils down to! Also, it seems to never have occurred to some folks that you could actually talk (you know, verbally) to a person to figure out what it is that they like or don't like. Or explore things other then actual sexual intercourse to figure out if a person is compatible or not. No you weren't wrong it was a bit condescending b/c it's pretty damn frustrating when so many people use a person's sex life as a measure for overall compatibility. It seems like such a stupid factor to hinge the whole relationship on.... But whatever, it doesn't matter what I think about much of anything.
....and that last bit isn't breaking news on here.
And how do you know what you like in bed before you've tried it out a few times? It honestly takes practice and not all partners are going to match
Sexuality is important to most people. It's like a critically placed Jenga block. There are other factors that can send the relationship tumbling down and maybe you can take sex out of the equation without things falling apart, but you're putting your relationship in really precarious circumstances.
I don't want to have sex until marriage but I'm worried that women won't date me if we don't have sex.
I'm doing this for personal rather than religious reasons.
I've casually hooked-up (no sex) with girls in the past and I've never felt fulfilled being intimate with people I don't really like. So I've decided to remain a virgin until marriage.
I absolutely would, because I don't plan on having sex until marriage either. I'm also doing it for personal reasons, although I am a Christian, although more spiritual than religious.
Society and religion are two things that have controlled our sexuality for thousands of years and you see it evident in this post: Like its bad to have sex unless society at large or a deity approves of your mating decisions?. "Guilt" is usually the control device employed to control the average man or womans sexuality. As for as I'm concerned I'm going to expore and enjoy my sexuality without the Guilt that many people place in their bed room.
While I'm fine with people basing their own sexual awakening on what society or their Deity says, I don't care for the "Better than thou" stance that many try to push off on the rest of us.
I'm still waiting to hear what the advantages are of waiting until marriage to have sex.
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LOL. Which is why I don't buy it when people say 'well relationship isn't all about sex...." Well apparently it is & that what it boils down to! Also, it seems to never have occurred to some folks that you could actually talk (you know, verbally) to a person to figure out what it is that they like or don't like. Or explore things other then actual sexual intercourse to figure out if a person is compatible or not. No you weren't wrong it was a bit condescending b/c it's pretty damn frustrating when so many people use a person's sex life as a measure for overall compatibility. It seems like such a stupid factor to hinge the whole relationship on.... But whatever, it doesn't matter what I think about much of anything. 
. "Guilt" is usually the control device employed to control the average man or womans sexuality. As for as I'm concerned I'm going to expore and enjoy my sexuality without the Guilt that many people place in their bed room. 
