Making friends in the Twin Cities (Minneapolis: public school, professionals, zip codes)

[audadvnc]

Originally Posted by pirate_lafitte

Big reason why I DON'T use meetup.

The reason you don't use meetup is that you aren't guaranteed a perfect match with the first group you wander into? That doesn't make sense. That's like saying your first high school date was a dud, so you'll never date again.

Maybe that's a good thing for the rest of us, eh?

[User032009]

Originally Posted by queenswake

What's common in so many of these threads about it being hard to meet people in MN is that so many of the posters are living in the suburbs, and often the far out ones. Which is a hard place to meet anyone all across the country by nature of their design and who lives there. It's families. You meet people through school and sports that your kids are involved. You meet the neighbors when your kids and their kids start playing together. Otherwise, just about your only other option is to meet people through church or join a bowling or softball league.

I'm not suggesting that everyone move to the city, but people should be aware of the difficulties of meeting people when moving to a suburb in a city where you don't know a single soul. Suburbs are designed for families. Everyone drives everywhere, drives into their garage and the door shuts behind them and you don't see the person until they leave for work the next morning. In cities, you meet people walking by while you are out doing yard work or just sitting out a nice evening. There are more neighorhood festivals and gatherings. Just more things going on.

I also suggest attending some of the events in this group: Twin Cities Transplants (Saint Paul, MN) - Meetup

I disagree. Whether living in the city or a suburb, people still are having issues (with friendships and making friends in the neighborhood). I have lived in the Twin Cities since moving to MN and still had trouble finding friends. Also, joining Meetup doesn't necessarily aid in making new friends, either. It's still VERY hard to get people here to actually meet up, and I have had to leave or disband a few Meetup groups because of lack of interest/participation. I have lucked out and connected with three other transplants who were also having trouble making friends here through Craigslist.org, but for the most part, with Craigslist, I've had far more misses than hits.

[uptown_urbanist]

Originally Posted by User032009

I disagree. Whether living in the city or a suburb, people still are having issues (with friendships and making friends in the neighborhood). I have lived in the Twin Cities since moving to MN and still had trouble finding friends. Also, joining Meetup doesn't necessarily aid in making new friends, either. It's still VERY hard to get people here to actually meet up, and I have had to leave or disband a few Meetup groups because of lack of interest/participation. I have lucked out and connected with three other transplants who were also having trouble making friends here through Craigslist.org, but for the most part, with Craigslist, I've had far more misses than hits.

I agree that Meetup is hit or miss, but am curious about the other part; you say that living in the city or suburb doesn't make a difference. That may be true, but can I ask whether or not you've lived in the city? I'm just curious if your statement is based on personal experience living in both suburbs and city (or in one or the other).

[QuantumIguana]

I've generally made friends from the activities that I participate in, or through other friends. I suppose if you're a transplant, you don't have the "social network" (of the old fashioned, non-digital variety). Is this sort of networking more prevalent in Minnesota than in other parts of the country?

[Laggard]

I have a tough time finding friends and it's simply because there are not a lot of mid 40s punk rock ex pats with my interests who have not moved to the burbs, married and squeezed out a couple pups. My interests are not mainstream and this makes the potential friend pool small.

I've checked out Meetup.com but since I hate dancing, don't care about wine, can't afford fine food and am not a big outdoor person, meetup groups are pretty limited for me.

[audadvnc]

Originally Posted by Laggard

My interests are not mainstream and this makes the potential friend pool small.

Well, OK then. We all make choices. Is this a Twin Cities specific issue?

Is punk rock really all that important to you anymore? Did you check the St Paul Aerie for the Arts (http://www.meetup.com/eaglesclub33/ - broken link) on Meetup, or even just hang out at the Bryant Lake Bowl? You could create your own group if you wanted to.

[Laggard]

Originally Posted by audadvnc

Well, OK then. We all make choices. Is this a Twin Cities specific issue?

Is punk rock really all that important to you anymore? Did you check the St Paul Aerie for the Arts (http://www.meetup.com/eaglesclub33/ - broken link) on Meetup, or even just hang out at the Bryant Lake Bowl? You could create your own group if you wanted to.

Is punk still important to me? What an odd question. Of course.

Bryant Lake? Hate it. Been through the Mpls scenes over the years. Lost touch with a lot of people over the last ten years. Looking for like minded people to drink beer, go to shows and watch the Premiership with.

Tough though as most people seem to have their closed group of friends and don't really need or want more friends. Hard to break into those circles. Wifey and I have a lot of aquantences who are like us but most of them are 15 - 20 years younger than us.

Triple Rock tonight if anyone's interested.

[golfgal]

Originally Posted by Laggard

Is punk still important to me? What an odd question. Of course.

Bryant Lake? Hate it. Been through the Mpls scenes over the years. Lost touch with a lot of people over the last ten years. Looking for like minded people to drink beer, go to shows and watch the Premiership with.

Tough though as most people seem to have their closed group of friends and don't really need or want more friends. Hard to break into those circles. Wifey and I have a lot of aquantences who are like us but most of them are 15 - 20 years younger than us.

Triple Rock tonight if anyone's interested.

So have you tried to take up golf, for example, to meet new people? Because your interests are not mainstream it is everyone else's fault you can't find friends. I have ZERO interest in going to a bar and listen to punk rock music but because I don't like that I am unfriendly??

[audadvnc]

+1 to golfgal. The tone of this thread seems to be, "I don't like people and I hate their shallow, simple lives - they're not worth knowing. BTW, why doesn't anybody like me?"

[Laggard]

Originally Posted by golfgal

So have you tried to take up golf, for example, to meet new people? Because your interests are not mainstream it is everyone else's fault you can't find friends. I have ZERO interest in going to a bar and listen to punk rock music but because I don't like that I am unfriendly??

Golf team in high school. Lost interest in it.

Not sure where I said or implied that people like you were unfriendly. There are people out there with my interests. Just tough finding them and being let into their circle.