Is being Blunt and Direct a Bad Thing? (business, best, coworker)
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Location: In a city within a state where politicians come to get their PHDs in Corruption
2,907 posts, read 2,070,068 times
Reputation: 4478
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nlambert
You're entitled to think whatever you want. In the meantime those of us who actually do these things for a living will keep reading and laughing.
It's the internet. We're all 10s making a million plus per year, remember?
Yeah, you're right that is why in the last seven years I have been on this site, and in over 450 posts that was the only time I mentioned my income. But keep laughing, and keep "doing the things".
OP, move to Boston and work in my area. You'll be completely normal. Many people here are dicks...just like you! It's still a negative but people here aren't surprised by it.
Since it isn't completely uncommon here, I am not surprised or offended by it but am also not like that, I do joke and am sarcastic. And I am particularly sarcastic with people like you (I use mocking a lot as well)...I've found it to be the best and easiest way to deal with and get my message across regarding how I feel about that type of attitude and behavior.
The whole point of Briggs Myers and similar programs is to help you understand yourself, others and how to best communicate with them.
If you KNOW you are blunt and direct and you are dealing with an INFP, do you expect that blunt & direct will be an effective way to communicate with them?
I know it is hard, but if you all speak a common language of Briggs Myers at your workplace then use that to your advantage and work with people based on where they are. I think it is perfectly fine to tell someone you are INTJ and ask them where they fall on the scale. Let them know that being an INTJ you may be too direct sometimes and apologize in advance and ask them to help you by letting you know when you are being too much of an INTJ. Ask them where they tested and deal with them based on that.
It has everything to the with the original post. The premise is that somehow a competent, efficient, results oriented direct person should adapt to someone who is not. As to "include everyone", or "not to alienate". I reject that premise.
I bet you're not this way to your clients or to your boss, back when you had one. You may claim differently, of course.
And is "a competent, efficient, results oriented" tattooed somewhere visible on your body so people you deal with can understand this is why you are that way?
Location: In a city within a state where politicians come to get their PHDs in Corruption
2,907 posts, read 2,070,068 times
Reputation: 4478
Quote:
Originally Posted by jaypee
I bet you're not this way to your clients or to your boss, back when you had one. You may claim differently, of course.
And is "a competent, efficient, results oriented" tattooed somewhere visible on your body so people you deal with can understand this is why you are that way?
To offend people, hurt and humiliate them for no reason? Yes it is bad. To be more assertive and make your thoughts known, no not bad, in fact it is often times needed.
Say if I am not sure if a woman I have been texting with is serious after canceling meet ups, I then tell her my intentions and demand she tell me if she wants to meet up and if not then for her to let me know and I will move on. That is good.
But for me to go up to a random stranger and tell them that they are truly unattractive, that is bad and I can get hurt.
It depends on the situation. As with all things you have to know your limit. OP you have act according to situation, as with everything.
Not knowing when not to be blunt means your decency and social skills are poor.
Yeah, you're right that is why in the last seven years I have been on this site, and in over 450 posts that was the only time I mentioned my income. But keep laughing, and keep "doing the things".
No worries there. I don't mention my income, nor will I ever. I don't need to flash my paycheck or make internet claims that I own any successful companies to be successful.
One word of advice (which you'll likely ignore).... treat your employees (heck anyone really) with respect and learn to talk TO them and not AT them. Everyone is different and we must all work to adapt to different situations and to different people's abilities. There's a HUGE difference and sadly I feel like you're one day going to learn this lesson the hard way.
The positive side of it is, if you're in a situation where you want to get a Minnesotan (or North Dakotan) out of your life forever, just be bluntly honest with them. You'll never hear from them again.
So true.....Wish I'd learned how to play the game sooner.
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