Female acquaintance of mine has slept with 30+ guys in the last 4 months (marriage, feeling)
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condom breaks during intercourse. she gave you herpes not knowing she even had it yet because she it hasn't manifested in physical symptoms yet (Hench she did not know). now what?
Head to the doctor and see what kind of medications I can be put on to prevent an outbreak and hope for the best.
She's fair game that weekend. Her personal issues are not my problem and I don't plan on making it my problem.
As I said before, if she wants to get down, cool....if not, that's fine too.
You invite this woman in your life her personal problems DO become your problem. Are you that naive?
"Not your problem" - sure until she pulls out an ice pick and hacks you off or starts stalking your ass everywhere. People who exhibit dysfunction such as this in one area of their life, typically have it in other areas of their life as well and there is typically a traumatic reason for it. Do you want to be the one she's with when she suddenly discovers this and the supressed anger surfaces?
Get a clue, open that door, invite her in - and you invite everything in.
You invite this woman in your life her personal problems DO become your problem. Are you that naive?
"Not your problem" - sure until she pulls out an ice pick and hacks you off or starts stalking your ass everywhere. People who exhibit dysfunction such as this in one area of their life, typically have it in other areas of their life as well and there is typically a traumatic reason for it. Do you want to be the one she's with when she suddenly discovers this and the supressed anger surfaces?
Get a clue, open that door, invite her in - and you invite everything in.
I know how to handle things. I don't even plan on trying to hook up with her, but if it happens, it happens. We've met once or twice before, but I'm sure we'll become much closer after that weekend (even without any sex). Both of us will be fine regardless of what happens.
I just think it's bizarre AND impolite for an adult to either
1. discuss the amount of sexual partners another adult has had or
2. judge that amount as "too many" or "not enough"
Like, who cares?????
I think if a person wants to live like that, it's best not to tell everything to a gossip and hang out with guys who are going to treat you like the town bicycle.
Quote:
Originally Posted by JrzDefector
I think the rule is mostly used in Dan Savage's writings to apply to relationships in which there is some sort significant age difference (see his entry in Wikipedia), but I take it to apply to relationships where there is an imbalance of power - as there would be with someone on a self-destructive kick. There's an obligation to "leave it better than you found it." Like when my FWB situation got to the point where I knew that my partner was in love with me and that I would never feel more than friendly affection towards him, I knew the only ethical thing to do was to end the relationship. I'm not so hard up for sex that I'm gonna string some guy along just to get what I want.
Also, you kinda gotta wonder about a guy who's willing to be "NEXT!" in someone else's downward spiral. I mean, come on. Are you so hard up you're willing to be complicit in someone else's breakdown? It's all about common decency, I think. 30 guys in 4 months immediately after the end of a long relationship? That's a red flag for sure.
In the event that I do sleep with her, no prosecutable offense will be committed. However, as I said before, it's a "whatever happens, happens" situation.
Yep. That's the standard for all of my sexual encounters: No prosecutable offense will be committed. Set the bar low much?
If the story is true, the chick sounds pretty mentally unstable at the moment, and yeah it would be pretty shallow to take advantage of someone like that. But setting that aside .... You actually want to follow 30+ dudes in 4 months? Hahahaha more power to you if that's your thing, but I would have a little more self respect than that. I'm sure you can do better than this, but good luck to you whatever you decide.
Given the moral/ethical standards exhibited, do you really think he CAN do better? I think it's his would-be target who can do better. The OP is apparently just finding his level.
I do agree with you on some of these points. Oh it does say something about him but IMO it says something about 95 percent of men doesn't it? If there's an opportunity to be taking advantage of some woman sexually (and it's not deemed 'illegal') I mean isn't that just 'how they are?' when it comes to this type of thing. I just feel like it's a woman's obligation to not put herself out there to be treated like a sex toy; sorry but you really can't expect men to act accordingly. At least I don't.
IMO FWB and ethical don't belong in the same sentence anyways. LOL.
No, I really don't think all men are like this, or even 95 percent of men.
FWB and ethical definitely do go together. No-strings sex doesn't mean that all moral obligations go out the window. Just because your relationship is purely physical doesn't mean the other person just becomes a box of disposable tissues. They're still another human being, and one whom you presumably feel some affection for, unless you're into a really depressing kind of sex.
In the event that I do sleep with her, no prosecutable offense will be committed. However, as I said before, it's a "whatever happens, happens" situation.
Matter of the difference between illegal and immoral.
Matter of the difference between illegal and immoral.
Or illegal and just plain icky.
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