Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
 
Old 09-03-2012, 02:40 AM
 
1,325 posts, read 2,921,694 times
Reputation: 1411

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by rego00123 View Post
condom breaks during intercourse. she gave you herpes not knowing she even had it yet because she it hasn't manifested in physical symptoms yet (Hench she did not know). now what?
Head to the doctor and see what kind of medications I can be put on to prevent an outbreak and hope for the best.

I mean, what else am I supposed to do?

 
Old 09-03-2012, 02:42 AM
 
26,142 posts, read 31,197,348 times
Reputation: 27237
Quote:
Originally Posted by bicoastal10 View Post
She's fair game that weekend. Her personal issues are not my problem and I don't plan on making it my problem.

As I said before, if she wants to get down, cool....if not, that's fine too.
You invite this woman in your life her personal problems DO become your problem. Are you that naive?

"Not your problem" - sure until she pulls out an ice pick and hacks you off or starts stalking your ass everywhere. People who exhibit dysfunction such as this in one area of their life, typically have it in other areas of their life as well and there is typically a traumatic reason for it. Do you want to be the one she's with when she suddenly discovers this and the supressed anger surfaces?

Get a clue, open that door, invite her in - and you invite everything in.
 
Old 09-03-2012, 02:47 AM
 
1,325 posts, read 2,921,694 times
Reputation: 1411
Quote:
Originally Posted by Thursday007 View Post
You invite this woman in your life her personal problems DO become your problem. Are you that naive?

"Not your problem" - sure until she pulls out an ice pick and hacks you off or starts stalking your ass everywhere. People who exhibit dysfunction such as this in one area of their life, typically have it in other areas of their life as well and there is typically a traumatic reason for it. Do you want to be the one she's with when she suddenly discovers this and the supressed anger surfaces?

Get a clue, open that door, invite her in - and you invite everything in.
I know how to handle things. I don't even plan on trying to hook up with her, but if it happens, it happens. We've met once or twice before, but I'm sure we'll become much closer after that weekend (even without any sex). Both of us will be fine regardless of what happens.
 
Old 09-03-2012, 06:35 AM
 
Location: The Hall of Justice
25,901 posts, read 42,720,278 times
Reputation: 42769
Quote:
Originally Posted by MsAnnThrope View Post
I just think it's bizarre AND impolite for an adult to either

1. discuss the amount of sexual partners another adult has had or
2. judge that amount as "too many" or "not enough"

Like, who cares?????
I think if a person wants to live like that, it's best not to tell everything to a gossip and hang out with guys who are going to treat you like the town bicycle.

Quote:
Originally Posted by JrzDefector View Post
I think the rule is mostly used in Dan Savage's writings to apply to relationships in which there is some sort significant age difference (see his entry in Wikipedia), but I take it to apply to relationships where there is an imbalance of power - as there would be with someone on a self-destructive kick. There's an obligation to "leave it better than you found it." Like when my FWB situation got to the point where I knew that my partner was in love with me and that I would never feel more than friendly affection towards him, I knew the only ethical thing to do was to end the relationship. I'm not so hard up for sex that I'm gonna string some guy along just to get what I want.

Also, you kinda gotta wonder about a guy who's willing to be "NEXT!" in someone else's downward spiral. I mean, come on. Are you so hard up you're willing to be complicit in someone else's breakdown? It's all about common decency, I think. 30 guys in 4 months immediately after the end of a long relationship? That's a red flag for sure.
I agree.
 
Old 09-03-2012, 06:48 AM
 
14,375 posts, read 18,385,483 times
Reputation: 43059
Quote:
Originally Posted by bicoastal10 View Post
In the event that I do sleep with her, no prosecutable offense will be committed. However, as I said before, it's a "whatever happens, happens" situation.
Yep. That's the standard for all of my sexual encounters: No prosecutable offense will be committed. Set the bar low much?
 
Old 09-03-2012, 06:51 AM
 
14,375 posts, read 18,385,483 times
Reputation: 43059
Quote:
Originally Posted by BioMechanical View Post
If the story is true, the chick sounds pretty mentally unstable at the moment, and yeah it would be pretty shallow to take advantage of someone like that. But setting that aside .... You actually want to follow 30+ dudes in 4 months? Hahahaha more power to you if that's your thing, but I would have a little more self respect than that. I'm sure you can do better than this, but good luck to you whatever you decide.
Given the moral/ethical standards exhibited, do you really think he CAN do better? I think it's his would-be target who can do better. The OP is apparently just finding his level.
 
Old 09-03-2012, 06:56 AM
 
14,375 posts, read 18,385,483 times
Reputation: 43059
Quote:
Originally Posted by Doll Eyes View Post
I do agree with you on some of these points. Oh it does say something about him but IMO it says something about 95 percent of men doesn't it? If there's an opportunity to be taking advantage of some woman sexually (and it's not deemed 'illegal') I mean isn't that just 'how they are?' when it comes to this type of thing. I just feel like it's a woman's obligation to not put herself out there to be treated like a sex toy; sorry but you really can't expect men to act accordingly. At least I don't.

IMO FWB and ethical don't belong in the same sentence anyways. LOL.
No, I really don't think all men are like this, or even 95 percent of men.

FWB and ethical definitely do go together. No-strings sex doesn't mean that all moral obligations go out the window. Just because your relationship is purely physical doesn't mean the other person just becomes a box of disposable tissues. They're still another human being, and one whom you presumably feel some affection for, unless you're into a really depressing kind of sex.
 
Old 09-03-2012, 07:43 AM
 
Location: NY metro area
7,796 posts, read 16,406,814 times
Reputation: 10808
Why do I get the feeling bicoastal has a house share with this crew:


Last edited by TheImportersWife; 09-03-2012 at 07:59 AM.. Reason: Typo
 
Old 09-03-2012, 07:55 AM
 
Location: Texas
44,259 posts, read 64,397,970 times
Reputation: 73937
Quote:
Originally Posted by bicoastal10 View Post
In the event that I do sleep with her, no prosecutable offense will be committed. However, as I said before, it's a "whatever happens, happens" situation.
Matter of the difference between illegal and immoral.
 
Old 09-03-2012, 08:42 AM
 
Location: Katonah, NY
21,192 posts, read 25,181,467 times
Reputation: 22276
Quote:
Originally Posted by stan4 View Post
Matter of the difference between illegal and immoral.
Or illegal and just plain icky.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.



All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top