Anyone in their 20s or 30s do not have any friends (person, gossip)
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Yep, when I left college I no longer had that community and suddenly had no friends. (this was before we could keep in touch via facebook) I made one really good friend by volunteering. Got married 3 years after graduation and moved to a new state where we knew NO ONE. Making friends was really hard! Most people we met had family nearby and were too busy to make new friends. Or they had grown up there and still had friends from high school. It was hard to make friends at work due to the nature of the job, plus, I got laid off, bounced around a lot, the women were at a different stage of life, etc etc.
Finally made friends when my youngest went to Kindergarten and we started doing soccer and scouts, etc. But even those friendships come and go. Women are fickle! As soon as I got divorced? The invites to card night and cook outs and spa night dried up in a hurry. I had one divorced friend who dropped me as soon as she reconciled with her alcoholic husband.
Now my kids are teens and we've moved again. I am friendly with the ladies at work but I think it will take a long time before I have 'friends' here. My neighbors are 'friendly' but i haven't met anyone I want to be friends with. I tried church, but no one there seemed particularly interested, even when I volunteered there/sang in church choir. Also tried community theater, same result. I can make conversation in a gathering of people and meet people I enjoy connecting with, but it rarely goes anywhere. Most people seem to busy with their own lives and don't need more friends.
I have never been successful at transitioning people from acquaintances to friends. I have invited women to events/hangout/shop/activities etc based on our mutual interests, and rarely get a positive response. I don't know if it is something I'm doing 'wrong'. I'm a genuinely friendly, caring and interesting person. I do wish I had more friends, but I have no idea how to accomplish it.
i suspect Im not alone in this. To me it isn't any easier to make women friends than it is to find dates. Have you ever been to a Meetup? Lots of women at those who need friends.
I'm 24 and while I wouldn't say I have NO friends, I certainly do not have a ton of friends. In high school, I had SEVERAL, in college, it dwindled only staying in touch with good friends. Now, a few years after college, I really only have about 5 REALLY good friends that I can count on.
I think it's normal to grow apart from friends as you get older. Your wants/needs change, you move thousands of miles apart, etc. I would think it may be odd to have 0 friends though. Surely, there's SOMEONE you would consider a friend?
Hey at least you don't have to worry about birthday, Christmas, wedding, and baby gifts! ha Should save you quite a bit of money in the long run!
nobody has tons of friends except on FB
Now, it is not possible and not healthy to be isolated. We, humans, need companionship and other human's touch since birth. Babies and infants who are neglected develop behavioral problems. We all need someone to love us unconditionally; a friend whose shoulder to cry on.
I suggest to all of you to find new friends. Yes, life is tough and all of us experienced ups and down. A friend is there for the long run. A real friend wouldn't care if you do bad now even if he/she is successful. A real friend would help you and make you feel special. Don't give it up. Look for new friends. You don;t need more. A few, probably less then the fingers of one hand would be plenty. But it would make a difference in one's life.
Try meetups and dance lessons. People there are usually very friendly.
I'm 32. I only had a couple of friends, but they didn't want to hang out or talk/text as much after I got married a few years ago. So other than my husband and the occasional text message with an old friend, nope. No friends. Which sucks sometimes. But it's really hard to make friends with women as an adult unless you're in a mommy circle or part of a neighborhood (in my area).
I'm 26 and I have had a big, tight group of friends that I had right from the beginning, from being 4 years old starting school right until university years. I have moved around a lot for education/career reasons from when I was 18 and I haven't seen or spoken to most of them in about 4 years. I still consider them my real friends though. Since I've been away from them I've been through a few different groups of people but they were shallow friendships, and where I live now I hardly have anyone. I get on great with the people I work with, but we rarely meet in our free time. I do have a girlfriend too but it's long distance... I suppose this is just what happens in the modern world. I'm by myself the vast majority of my time these days.
I have found out, there's friends and there's real friends.
I believe you are lucky to have REAL friends at all, and those that do would be able to count them on one hand.
Real friends may not look how you want them to look, say what you want them to say, but they are always THERE, and they always CARE, they care about you and your happiness.
If people actually looked at those they called friends and thought "hmmm, if I was locked in a Bali jail would they bring me money and sit holding my hand through the bars for the entire visiting hour?" they would probably realise just how alone they actually are in this world.
Those of us without family rely on our friends though. I have one from HS who is my first, best, real friend and I hers.
I'm 28, only child, and grew up in the most sheltered and cut off from the world homes anyone can imagine. I was fed a sugar and spice version of how the world works. I was the sheep being led to the slaughter house. High school was the worst 4 years of my life. Avoided college. I cut off my family when I was 26 and life has been getting better ever since. It's still tough. I have awful social skills and have only been able to make about 3 good friends over the past 2 years. I go out by myself all the time, but it's something I've grown accustomed to. There's still times I feel like a loser but it's an uphill battle that I'm willing to fight.
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