My SO's uppercrust people can be so tacky or is it me? (husband, neighbors)
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I think you are missing the point that I hate Sushi. In my everyday life I'd never pay a penny for Sushi. I find it very abusive to my taste buds. So to say 50bucks is not a lot?
I'm getting worked up about the food because its a paid event, if I pay a whooping $50 per plate then I should love the food, it should not assault my tastebuds!
Also, most are missing the fact that FOR ME $50 a plate is on the higher end so I would expect to be satisfied. If it was a measly $10 that they asked for I'd just pay and hope for the best.
If you think $50 is too much to pay whatever the food, than this event is not for you.
Personally, I think you should take some time to reflect on what your actual business goals are. I do not know what your field is, but in many, there is a difference between being cheap and being frugal. In those fields, your obsession over $50 would be seen as cheap and imply a lack of understanding of the monetary value of networking contacts.
I think you are missing the point that I hate Sushi. In my everyday life I'd never pay a penny for Sushi. I find it very abusive to my taste buds. So to say 50bucks is not a lot?
I'm getting worked up about the food because its a paid event, if I pay a whooping $50 per plate then I should love the food, it should not assault my tastebuds!
Also, most are missing the fact that FOR ME $50 a plate is on the higher end so I would expect to be satisfied. If it was a measly $10 that they asked for I'd just pay and hope for the best.
Well, if $10 is what keeps you from complaining, then you get what you pay for including the kinds of people you are going to be networking with. I am not saying that paying $50 for sushi to people who were not clear from the beginning is going to give you access to the cream of the crop. However, from your OP, it sounds like there are going to be people there that you want to meet.
It is exceedingly tacky! How it could be thought otherwise is beyond me. A work situation? Who says? Michael didn't mention it was work related. Totally disgusting.
I have gone to many a business dinner where I did not like the food. Big deal - the food was not important. The host invited you to a business function and is having it catered. Pay it or stay home. Do not go and do yourself and your SO the disservice of haggling at the door for drinks only. You will look bad and it would have been better to not come at all. It will be noticed and be talked about. The only thing I see that looks inappropriate for the host is that sushi is an acquired taste for some and I would have selected a more mundane menu. However, he may have been trying for something less humdrum than boring rubber chicken usually served - so really can't fault him too much. If you can't get over the menu, you may not do well in the business world - because you are going to keep getting caught up in silly, unimportant stuff and blow it where it counts.
BTW, sushi is not just raw fish - you might try some other stuff there. My DIL would not eat sushi, but has since come to like it, although I notice she still favors the cooked items.
Many people are missing the OP's point that the cost was not mentioned up front and even when the invitation was received the $50 was mentioned more than once and other details were vague. The OP also implied that had the cost been say between $10-$25 instead of $50, it would have been less of an issue.
Furthermore, these events may be well intended, but 80% of the people tend to stay in their cliques of familiar people and there is no guarantee that these so called business heavyweights will give the OP the time of day. They may just speak to those they already know. I've seen it happen.
In a nutshell, there is no right answer and each of us has different ideas of what we want to pay for various things. It appears the OP will go anyways and we all hope it is a good and valuable experience.
Suggestion: grab some food from your favorite fast food restaurant an hour before the event and then you can "pretend" to like the sushi for these VIP's. LOL!
I have gone to many a business dinner where I did not like the food. Big deal - the food was not important. The host invited you to a business function and is having it catered. Pay it or stay home. Do not go and do yourself and your SO the disservice of haggling at the door for drinks only. You will look bad and it would have been better to not come at all. It will be noticed and be talked about. The only thing I see that looks inappropriate for the host is that sushi is an acquired taste for some and I would have selected a more mundane menu. However, he may have been trying for something less humdrum than boring rubber chicken usually served - so really can't fault him too much. If you can't get over the menu, you may not do well in the business world - because you are going to keep getting caught up in silly, unimportant stuff and blow it where it counts.
BTW, sushi is not just raw fish - you might try some other stuff there. My DIL would not eat sushi, but has since come to like it, although I notice she still favors the cooked items.
Thanks I appreciate the advice. You are right I guess ït can come off as ""haggling"" I guess. I thought it was a nice compromise and a fair one but I see how I can be viwed in a negative light for this.
I guess I have to take the whole package as it is or just decline.
My other hesitation about going is that from other previous experiences, when people lack common ettiquette and cant even send a proper invitation, that means they are tacky people plain & simple & I might find myself having a lousy evening, where their lack of common sense extends to the whole event.
My SO is supposed to be well bred but his ""peoples"" can be so tacky. One of his relatives, Michael works in the same industry as I/me(not sure which is better)? \
It isn't a matter of better, it's a matter of correct or incorrect. One is right, the other is wrong. I'm guessing that grammar and proper speech are not your strong suit. And throwing in "peoples" is clearly tacky.
So he decided to be kind enough to invite me to a networking event at their house. Everyone is invited, the city's mayor even, plus all our industry heavyweights or at least the top 4.
Now what bothers me about the invitation is that I ran into Michael & he mentioned that he'd like SO & I to come to a Sushi Party at his house. I assumed it was free.
That was your error and his omission.
This morning I wake up to Michael's son's email saying guys surprise Michael & lets go to his place for Sushi. Please find attached my bank details its $50 per plate.
WTF? Here are the reasons why I am angry
1) First of all Michael casually mentioned a Sushi Dinner to me. There was no mention of this $50 entry fee back then.
2) I hate how the son sent the invitation emails, included no mention of the Menu, no mention of time but was so quick to remind people to bring $50 a plate. Sounds tacky to me when you forget important details & yet remember to include your banking account.
3) At the end of the day, this is a work event & to pay $50/plate seems a bit too much. I am well off but thrifty I can count how many times I have had a $50dinner/plate in my personal life so to pay so much to sit with people I dont know that well pisses me off.
4) Tacky tacky, I dont even like Sushi, you want people to pay $50 a plate, at least ask them to go to a restaurant & have them pick what they want. Why would I pay $50/plate for Sushi I hate when I can get lobster & steak which I love for $35? You wanna charge $50/plate and detect what people eat? For that price I should pick what I like.
5) IMO if you are inviting people at home dont charge people for food at least not exhorbitant prices like $50 a plate.
6) This heiffer, you wanna charge me $50/plate at least include in the invitation email a full menu of what you are serving.
What if I go there, after wiring $50/plate only to get a roll of sushi & a slice of bread? IMO when you charge such exhorbitant prices you make it about money so they better prove that the cost is worth it, yup send me a menu to justify the price!
The SO seems to think they are outsourcing food from a fancy restaurant but I hate Sushi. Yet I want to go shake some famous hands in the city? Any advice?
I guess what I'm saying is that normally I'd invite tacky invites like this but I might meet powerful people if I go =always a good thing but since I do not eat Sushi I can not justify spending $50/plate for a meal I do not eat/enjoy.
I do not know how to diplomatically handle this? Que??
Here's the solution: Don't go. It's no skin of Michael's teeth. If you don't wish to network, then don't pay the fee.
Quote:
Originally Posted by biscuitmom
You're contradicting yourself all over the place.
The whole purpose of networking events is to sit with people you don't know. It doesn't matter what or if you eat, $50 is a reasonable fee for a chance to mingle with the top industry heavyweights in your field. That's assuming they go. You say they're "invited". Since this is a paid networking event, you have the right to ask who is attending before you pay.
If, as you indicated, you committed before understanding this was a paid event and you don't want to pay the fee, then simply say that to the host: "I'm sorry, I didn't understand this was a paid event when I committed. Now that I know it is, I've reconsidered and won't be attending. Please accept my regrets."
If you want to continue to gnash your teeth, tear your garments, and lose sleep over how the invitation was handled and what food is being served, that's your right. Have at it.
^^^ This. The one who is tacky is you, OP. You want everything your way. You want to eat steak and whatever, then go get it. You want to hobnob, then pay to do so. What they are serving is not the issue. Go out to eat beforehand, grab a McDonald's steak and egg sammy and be happy.
Quote:
Originally Posted by lkb0714
He was initially asked in passing was he not? Granted the OP is hardly an example of clear and succinct writing but did he not state "he ran into so and so" who issued the invitation on the fly?
Then a real invitation was issued by email.
Eh, he wants to go for business purposes but expects to go for free? Then complains about "tacky". It is tacky to expect others to pay for business dinners because you don't like the menu. How many business people have gone to restaurants they despise in order to please a client? Oh yeah, most of them. Now he has been invited to a networking opportunity that clearly social graces wise he may not be ready for, and he is going on and one about steak and lobster. If he expects to move ahead in the business world he should learn to be a little more tactful himself. Because the height of bad manners it to point out small mistakes others make.
I sincerely hope this is only because it is an internet forum and he is not going to have this attitude at the meeting. But I doubt it.
OP probably will take his sour puss to the dinner griping the whole way about being forced to eat sushi. Shut up, smile, and don't eat - or stay home. Talk about cranky and tacky!
Quote:
Originally Posted by angrymillionaire
I think I am leaning towards going. My SO is also invited. He has decided to quietly suffer through the Sushi which he is not particularly fond of. He suggested that since I was not willing to suffer through Sushi we pay for one and I do not eat while he does.
Well this just takes the "sushi"! OMG, there's little that's tackier. The host gets charged by the number of attendees, not whether one eats or does not eat. STAY THE HE** HOME!
Or can I say we both dont like Sushi but we should offer to pay for drinks and other expenses. Or are my solutions to the problem tacky? Again I want to go but I can not justify paying $50 for a plate for Sushi which I hate as well as an averall Menu I have not seen?
Quote:
Originally Posted by angrymillionaire
I think you are missing the point that I hate Sushi. In my everyday life I'd never pay a penny for Sushi. I find it very abusive to my taste buds. So to say 50bucks is not a lot?
I'm getting worked up about the food because its a paid event, if I pay a whooping $50 per plate then I should love the food, it should not assault my tastebuds!
NO, you pay $50 to ATTEND the event - don't like the food, don't eat! Good lord you are one incredibly CHEAP, STINGY, and TACKY person.
Also, most are missing the fact that FOR ME $50 a plate is on the higher end so I would expect to be satisfied. If it was a measly $10 that they asked for I'd just pay and hope for the best.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ask and it shall be given
*Ahem* 'Peoples' is a ghetto term (as well as tacky as hell! ). Not classy. 'Heifer,' too! And don't capitalize Sushi, por favor. Unless you do so for Spaghetti? LOL
Why would you feel obligated to go to a rip-off thing?
Quote:
Originally Posted by angrymillionaire
I refered to them as ""peoples"because I felt they were acting less than people and should be refered to as such.
I don't like Spaghetti I did however confess my love for fine steak & lobster.
Are you implying anyone who does not like Sushi is ghetto? Mike is that you & your crusty invitation?
Quote:
Originally Posted by chessgeek
Many people are missing the OP's point that the cost was not mentioned up front and even when the invitation was received the $50 was mentioned more than once and other details were vague. The OP also implied that had the cost been say between $10-$25 instead of $50, it would have been less of an issue.
The op should not go - anywhere where civilized people congregate. The tackiness of this entire thread has nothing to do with the OP's "uppercrust" relatives of her SO, it has to do with HER lack of manners, including her name-calling and use of derogatory terms including not knowing whether to use "I or me" as the subject of a phrase.
Low-life is a term best used to describe this thread and the thinking of the OP.
I think you are missing the point that I hate Sushi. In my everyday life I'd never pay a penny for Sushi. I find it very abusive to my taste buds. So to say 50bucks is not a lot?
I'm getting worked up about the food because its a paid event, if I pay a whooping $50 per plate then I should love the food, it should not assault my tastebuds!
Also, most are missing the fact that FOR ME $50 a plate is on the higher end so I would expect to be satisfied. If it was a measly $10 that they asked for I'd just pay and hope for the best.
Since you appear to be making more of an issue of the menu or lack of than the possible business opportunities don't go.
You will be miserable and you will make everyone around you miserable which will in turn cut off any/all possible business contacts who will take you seriously because you whined about the menu and the cost all evening.
Since you appear to be making more of an issue of the menu or lack of than the possible business opportunities don't go.
You will be miserable and you will make everyone around you miserable which will in turn cut off any/all possible business contacts who will take you seriously because you whined about the menu and the cost all evening.
This right here. It will hurt you more professionally than if you just stayed home. At least by not going, they will have no impression of you - as opposed to a negative one.
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). Not classy. 'Heifer,' too! And don't capitalize Sushi, por favor. Unless you do so for Spaghetti? LOL
