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Seeing as you have to wonder if the OP were female would the posters be giving the same reaction it seems the fat men threads you noticed weren't about an OP dating such a guy but the guy himself likely asking advice. In that there are plenty of threads/posts were fat women aren't treated with 'kid gloves'.
I have yet to see the dichotomy I bolded be the general notion if anything it seems guys are to be accepted 'just as they are' and it's shallow, superficial, stuck up for the gal to evaluate his looks and she's supposed to give him a chance.
Well I guess you don't quite understand the different dynamic for women and men around their bodies. But again, if it is someone you care about being supportive and non confrontational is the way to go.
It can be fun/enjoyable to a certain extent. But how many people leave a workout saying "My God that was fun". Many gym memberships go un-used.
Sports are often the best way of getting people working out with more of a fun element.
Yoga 5.30am at Sydney harbour, didn't know that. What days a week do they do that?
I never ever enjoy my workouts. They're painful, they're boring, and I'd rather be out having coffee and conversation, walking around window shopping, at a concert, the theater, a jazz club, or at a restaurant.
You tell them because its a SERIOUS issue. Just as serious as if they were abusing drugs or alcohol. MORE serious actually because more people die per year from obesity related illness than drugs or alcohol. Just as serious as if they were 2 pack a day smokers and already developed hacking, wheezing, emphysema type coughing and you tell them "You need to do something about your smoking".
A REAL woman in a REAL relationship would totally be okay with it because she knows that the guy is coming from a HEALTH and FUTURE OF OUR CHILDREN perspective and not some "I don't find you attractive" approach.
Its extremely important to tell them. Never ignore it.
You tell them because its a SERIOUS issue. Just as serious as if they were abusing drugs or alcohol. MORE serious actually because more people die per year from obesity related illness than drugs or alcohol. Just as serious as if they were 2 pack a day smokers and already developed hacking, wheezing, emphysema type coughing and you tell them "You need to do something about your smoking".
A REAL woman in a REAL relationship would totally be okay with it because she knows that the guy is coming from a HEALTH and FUTURE OF OUR CHILDREN perspective and not some "I don't find you attractive" approach.
Its extremely important to tell them. Never ignore it.
We don't even know if it is serious. For all we know OP is worried about 10 vanity pounds. There Are degrees of "overweight."
There really is a big difference between vanity weight and weight gain where a persons health is at risk or you see a person use food to cope with depression etc. If this is about vanity you don't say anything in my opinion. Most people know they have gained weight and to point it out is just hurtful. I also feel it sends a message that your major focus of you significant other is their appearance. I feel this way for a male who may have gained too.
If you are concerned about their health then stating it out of concern is different and offering to have them get help from a professional.
Really in relationships people's appearance change whether it be gaining weight, wrinkles, balding etc. That is why having a relationship that is not just based on appearance but the other traits you find attractive in that person is important.
Don't tell me "you don't" ! There has to be some way to bring it up and encourage / support , ask them to loose weight and get in shape without hurting their feelings. I know being pushy or rude is no way to go but somebody has had to have hit on the exact combination of timing and words to pull it off
There isn't. Get used to it or end the relationship if you can't deal with this situation.
Overweight people have mirrors. Bringing up the obvious doesn't usually go well. They get defensive and start binge eating in front of you just to prove you they still have some power over their bodies.
It's like alcoholics, they need to be the ones who initiate the change.
You tell them because its a SERIOUS issue. Just as serious as if they were abusing drugs or alcohol. MORE serious actually because more people die per year from obesity related illness than drugs or alcohol. Just as serious as if they were 2 pack a day smokers and already developed hacking, wheezing, emphysema type coughing and you tell them "You need to do something about your smoking".
A REAL woman in a REAL relationship would totally be okay with it because she knows that the guy is coming from a HEALTH and FUTURE OF OUR CHILDREN perspective and not some "I don't find you attractive" approach.
Its extremely important to tell them. Never ignore it.
Oh really.
I'd be nuts if I believed that.
Men who would tell their wives that they're overweight don't do it because they want their wives to be healthy. They do it because of a sexual thing - they like women who look thinner, PERIOD. They want their wives to look thin so they can get more aroused. These same exact men probably don't care a rat's behind what their wives' blood count looks like, or what their gynecologist said. However, they'll fall off their chairs in a restaurant trying to see how much their wives are eating, and making damned sure it's low fat, low cal, low everything. All in the name of sex and arousal.
There isn't. Get used to it or end the relationship if you can't deal with this situation.
Overweight people have mirrors. Bringing up the obvious doesn't usually go well. They get defensive and start binge eating in front of you just to prove you they still have some power over their bodies.
It's like alcoholics, they need to be the ones who initiate the change.
Exactly! It'd be like telling someone who has a pigeon on his head that there's a pigeon on his head. Silly.
next time she says "honey dose this dress make me look fat"?
tell her "no sweetheart, its the fat that makes you look fat".
she'll get the hint (hopefully).
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I have yet to see the dichotomy I bolded be the general notion if anything it seems guys are to be accepted 'just as they are' and it's shallow, superficial, stuck up for the gal to evaluate his looks and she's supposed to give him a chance.
Silly.
