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Post # 27 is very accurate. There are a lot more people in this area WHO THINK they are important than there are people who really are important. Most of the self-important could be replaced by a number of people on the drop of a dime.
Post # 30 covers some excellent points but, IMO, may be a bit too generalized or too extreme. School and work/connections definitely matter here, but there is more to life than that. I have noticed that people tend to size others up at first. While it may not seem that strange, one can interpret this as someone else gathering the information they need to deem whether or not it's worth pursuing a stronger relationship with someone they just met.
I would agree that this is a bad area for singles. It's ironic b/c it (supposedly) has a very high percentage of single people. That sounds good, but we need to ask WHY this is the case. I'd agree that some of the factors mentioned in the above post play into this. I'm not sure it's quite as judgmental as the above post implies, but there is not shortage of emphasis placed on pedigree. A lot of people are tied up in their causes (be it Political, Non Profit, etc) so they don't place as much emphasis on their personal lives.
I have heard that this is a great place right out of College to boost your resume, make connections, etc. But people like to settle down elsewhere where life is more simple. I'd agree.
DC/MD people have all the pent up aggression of New Yorkers...with one MAJOR variable. They dont understand irony and sarcasm...and they dont have a sense of humor. The latter mixed with the agression and a workaholic culture is a lethal mix. I did 6 years there...back to the northeast we ran...
Post # 30 covers some excellent points but, IMO, may be a bit too generalized or too extreme. School and work/connections definitely matter here, but there is more to life than that. I have noticed that people tend to size others up at first. While it may not seem that strange, one can interpret this as someone else gathering the information they need to deem whether or not it's worth pursuing a stronger relationship with someone they just met.
I can see that, but I honestly never thought about it that way. I tend to ask "where did you go" or "what do you do" when I meet someone, just to start a conversation: Oh you went to X University? I had some friends there/visited there/hear good things/how did you like it/etc. (Keep in mind I'm talking to 22-26 year olds, college wasn't that long ago--I wouldn't ask a 35-year-old guy where he went to school.) As for work, most people I'm talking to are trying to start a career in a field that they are interested in, so for me it's more of trying to figure out what interests the person (not salary or connections).
Guess I'll just have to be more careful in asking about this, since it really seems to bother some people...
^
Yeah, I tend to agree with juniperbleu. People who think the "what do you do?" line of questioning is inherently sizing people up is perhaps imagined by those who feel they don't measure up.
DC is a town of careers, and unique ones at that, so a logical means of finding common ground is by probing in that direction. Having stepped out of this culture for a while and definitely not "sizing up" to DC career standards, it was jolting being thrown back in at a party last week where I heard countless college names and titles dropped. But, in the end, there were a bunch of people from peace corps at the party and everybody had fun playing some games. I don't think anyone was looking down on anyone else, just trying to find common ground.
In other "friendly" places where the rat race is to pop out the best children or be the most saved the question might be "Where are your children in school?" or "What church do you go to?" Same game, different field.
I have to say, I find the responses in this post hysterical. I'm a native NYer and am sincerely pleased to hear taht we are not the only state that this happens in. the giving directions thing can throw you off. I feel like any time I ever ask anyone here how to get some where they are like uhhhhhhh I don't know. I really want to slap them (oops did I say that). But eventually, I figure it out. I was considering DC to relocate to since the suburbs seem to be in closer proximity to the city than NY - I don't really consider an hour and 45 minutes on the LIRR a nice trip. I will say that I have been enlightened. While natives may not be as brash as NYers there is still that grittiness. I think Wisconson is where I need to be - LOL.
As a midwesterner, I have no real stake in this whole thing. But having been in both areas on many occassions, I much prefer the laid-back CA attitude and lifestyle. While there are undoubtedly tons of great people everywhere, I would rank ALL areas of CA that I have been to (including LA, SF, and SD areas) well above those of DC-MD for people generally (not everyone of course) being more laid back, receptive to outsiders, friendly, and not having big sticks up their elitist butts.
Is anybody in this thread a DC/MD/VA native? I think we native DC-metro people have it pretty bad because these vicious Type A a--h---s are often our parents, teachers, and eventually our colleagues/bosses. And sometimes we become them ourselves. I've personally tried to avoid it.
It is a horrible place to grow up if you have typically pushy parents/teachers who don't accept you for being "different" or fulfilling their plans for you.
I went to school with many people like Elisabeth Stanford and almost became a casualty of this culture myself, several times: Teens' Suicides Breed Anxiety
By 17 I was an I.B. burnout and a huge disappointment to all the adults in my life.
You know you live in a destructive culture when you're fifteen and you feel like a complete failure. I sure did. And I know many people like me.
We're not all a--h---s and j--k--fs. But sometimes it feels like all the nicer, more laidback people keep leaving for greener pastures. And the ones that stay/return are mostly here for the money.
Our regional identity has been eroding for years because of our Doom Boom economy and the like. Money is a real curse in our case. Other areas have to reinvent themselves to attract people but we will always attract economic (not cultural) mercenaries because we seem to have an endless supply of bloated federal budgets/contracts.
Having outsiders constantly insult us collectively only rubs salt into our wounds.
Sometimes I think that if I stay here I won't live past 35. And I meet other GenXers who seem to feel similarly.
Last edited by AmericanAnomie; 01-29-2009 at 01:23 PM..
Reason: addition
I was born here and raised in the area, both of my parents were born and raised in DC, and each of my grandmothers were born here and graduated from Eastern HS (class of '30 -- woot!).
I honestly can't relate to anything in your post though. I do wish I was from somewhere else, but it's got nothing to do with childhood trauma or pushy parents.
There's Washington and there's DC. Washington is chronicled in the Washington Post, and portrayed to America in things like the West Wing and Dave.
Once you get beyond that, DC is a mid-sized southern city... a lot more like Savannah or Louisville than Paris or Tokyo.
There's Washington and there's DC. Washington is chronicled in the Washington Post, and portrayed to America in things like the West Wing and Dave.
Once you get beyond that, DC is a mid-sized southern city... a lot more like Savannah or Louisville than Paris or Tokyo.
I get what you mean. I find that I tend to gravitate toward the DC locals with multi-generational roots who are genuine, forgiving, and fun to be around and don't judge you for where you work and how you can forward their careers. The locals make dealing with the transient job mercenaries who honk you for no reason in their Passats more bearable. I guess a lot of the nicest locals have roots from back when this area was more "southern" and laidback. I also like the older, more mature folks better than the younger, insecure back-biters.
Also, CA has quasi-legalized pot. It seems to me that we have a lot of alcoholics and pill-poppers around here, which makes for a crappier time, imho.
This soo true....People in the south wait for the walk sign even if there is no traffic. I went to visit a friend in houston TX and was very much annoyed he had to wait everytime for the walk sign....I said to myself "what a country ass"...lol
It's not only that, whats worst is the police will ticket you for jaywalking.. which i find ridiculous.....anything that bring in money for the city... I'm in Arizona
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