Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Perhaps it's because many women are wary of 'nice guys'. Nice guys tend to be faking it 90% of the time just to get into your pants or use you in some way. At least bad boys put it all out there and don't act nice to get what they want. You may be part of that 10% that aren't faking it, but how can women know that? My ex was a nerdy 'nice guy' and I loved that about him... it turns out that he was cheating on me and was just a bad guy in disguise. Now, I don't trust the guys who are super nice because they'll probably just turn around and be a jerk just like all the others.
The big difference is that most women aren't on the prowl trying to fake it to sleep with as many men as they can. Many men are VERY good at persuading women into thinking they're special, when in reality they're screwing 5 more on the side.
Quote:
Originally Posted by shortnblack
Yes you are right.
There are bad boy ******* types who do more damage to women than good. The vicious cycle like you once mentioned repeats itself such that the hurting woman might take out her frustrations on the next guy who doesn't deserve that. Some women just go on sabbatical from the dating world. Guys do the same when he's been hurt by a cheating *****. I know nice guys who turned into temporary bad boys boys to get their fill of sex and partying. They return to nice when they want to settle down. I'm not one of the temps but I do know how to have fun without a care in the world. I just try not to hurt anyone in the process.
Bad boys don't let emotional involvement take the threshold of the girl they're with and the result sometimes is this good girl going bad. When a bad boy meets an equally bad girl, it could be world war III or a match made in heaven. I like good girls, but I like the bad girls who are honest and don't beat around the bush. If you want a friend with lots of bedroom benefits, speak truthfully and honestly about it. It's so easy to do but so hard for the words to come out. Putting sex aside, there's more to a relationship than just the physical content if you want that.
I understand now why some women want to get with me because they know I've been a nice guy for a very long time. Word of mouth goes around. Many times I can't forgive these ladies for passing me up early on because they thought I was a pushover. They made the choice to discard me. I have a backbone and a personality. Just too nice which is scary to be true for many of them I can't be a bad boy, it's not in me and maybe that's my fault. I can be a total bad-ass when I want to be when it comes to certain aspects of my life. Just not a true bad boy.
Eh hem, didn't you watch Revenge of the Nerds? Don't you remember Lewis? Jocks think about sports. Nerds think about sex lol! Nobody to warn poor JetJockey about the nerd cheating around behind your back. You know something, I might not be better as a musician by reputation to you, because women always think the guitarist of the band is busy stringin' up many chicks on the side. Not true for me, but I do like some of the attention my guitar and my saxophine bring in the company of women. Go for the drummer or bass player hahaha. Drummers got more to lose if the gig goes wrong carrying all of that stuff. Some get real pissy and pay extra attention to details and feelings which women like. The bass player is your safest bet. He's usually the glue that holds the band together. Look no further than the history of rock. John Paul Jones, John Entwistle, Phil Lesh, Bill Wyman, John Deacon. Now take a good look at the rest of their band mates and tell me what you think!
Lend me your ears and I'll sing you a song, and I won't try not to sing it out of tune!
Both make some excellent points about those nice guys who masquerade. Gotta say, good point shortnblack about the drummer, I know I went for the quiet drummer in my band, we were together four+ years, only to find, there was a wolf under that sheep coating. The things I found out that had gone on truly opened my eyes to the whole nice guy facade of some. I still prefer a decent man that treats people with decency and respect to a pompous jackarse, but I do understand why some gals like that those jacks put it out there on the surface and no major surprises await them to the personality of that person. There are plenty of great guys, but that nice guy thing really gets beat into the ground and used by some that we know really are everything but nice guys, just guys that aren't getting the play they think they are entitled to because they breath.
As far as the Bass player in our group, he was the most stable, focused and full of potential for a committed relationship, but don't kid yourself, the guy had his side kicks, he just managed indiscretions better.
There are bad boy ******* types who do more damage to women than good. The vicious cycle like you once mentioned repeats itself such that the hurting woman might take out her frustrations on the next guy who doesn't deserve that. Some women just go on sabbatical from the dating world. Guys do the same when he's been hurt by a cheating *****. I know nice guys who turned into temporary bad boys boys to get their fill of sex and partying. They return to nice when they want to settle down. I'm not one of the temps but I do know how to have fun without a care in the world. I just try not to hurt anyone in the process.
Bad boys don't let emotional involvement take the threshold of the girl they're with and the result sometimes is this good girl going bad. When a bad boy meets an equally bad girl, it could be world war III or a match made in heaven. I like good girls, but I like the bad girls who are honest and don't beat around the bush. If you want a friend with lots of bedroom benefits, speak truthfully and honestly about it. It's so easy to do but so hard for the words to come out. Putting sex aside, there's more to a relationship than just the physical content if you want that.
I understand now why some women want to get with me because they know I've been a nice guy for a very long time. Word of mouth goes around. Many times I can't forgive these ladies for passing me up early on because they thought I was a pushover. They made the choice to discard me. I have a backbone and a personality. Just too nice which is scary to be true for many of them I can't be a bad boy, it's not in me and maybe that's my fault. I can be a total bad-ass when I want to be when it comes to certain aspects of my life. Just not a true bad boy.
Eh hem, didn't you watch Revenge of the Nerds? Don't you remember Lewis? Jocks think about sports. Nerds think about sex lol! Nobody to warn poor JetJockey about the nerd cheating around behind your back. You know something, I might not be better as a musician by reputation to you, because women always think the guitarist of the band is busy stringin' up many chicks on the side. Not true for me, but I do like some of the attention my guitar and my saxophine bring in the company of women. Go for the drummer or bass player hahaha. Drummers got more to lose if the gig goes wrong carrying all of that stuff. Some get real pissy and pay extra attention to details and feelings which women like. The bass player is your safest bet. He's usually the glue that holds the band together. Look no further than the history of rock. John Paul Jones, John Entwistle, Phil Lesh, Bill Wyman, John Deacon. Now take a good look at the rest of their band mates and tell me what you think!
Lend me your ears and I'll sing you a song, and I won't try not to sing it out of tune!
It's funny you should mention musicians...because I won't date one. I'm a bass player who now plays mandolin and I've known my share of musicians. The bass player may pretend like he's stable, but he's getting just as much action as the guitar player. The drummer? Most of the drummers I've played with have been drunk ho's trying to hook up with as many women as possible... and 2 of the bands I played in were Christian bands.
No musicians unless they're hobby players like me. Musicians (I'm not talking about orchestra players, but rather generic 'I'm in a band' musicians) aren't to be trusted. Period. The cheating, the screwing around etc. that goes on while at shows or on tour is incredible. It's amazing how quickly that wedding ring gets 'lost' the first day they go on tour and then magically gets found again on the way back.
Welcome to CD. Give it some time. We have our share of bitter men here.
It's unfortunate but I think they're all silly. It's a huge sign of weakness and minimal intelligence when you allow a few bad apples to pave such a miserable path to the rest of your life.
Here's another sign of "minimal intelligence" -- concluding that other people's decisions (based on no personal knowledge to speak of to boot, LOL) must equal low intelligence simply because their choices aren't the same as yours.
Intelligence level has nothing to do with this conversation, it's about personal choices and that's all there is to it.
i believe women alway take the easy way out. now every women is a lesbians after having a bad relationship. excellent observation.
sometimes its good to look in the mirror to see why a relationship did not work. gob bless us
I think its a balance..definitely nothing wrong with walkng carefully after a bad experience..But the reality is..no one is the exception in this world. No one. We're all bound to get hurt one day. And those who claim to be the exception..I'd have a hard time believing youve ever experienced anything in life at all..
i believe women alway take the easy way out. now every women is a lesbians after having a bad relationship. excellent observation.
sometimes its good to look in the mirror to see why a relationship did not work. gob bless us
That is ridiculous- every woman is a lesbian after having a bad relationship? If that was true all women would be lesbians! Obviously not true.
So for a straight woman to become a lesbian is taking "the easy way out?" Are you you drunk,Dale??LOL
Do you think that having a sexual relationship with a man would be "taking the easy way out" if your wife cheated on you and then split.
Perhaps it's because many women are wary of 'nice guys'. Nice guys tend to be faking it 90% of the time just to get into your pants or use you in some way. At least bad boys put it all out there and don't act nice to get what they want. You may be part of that 10% that aren't faking it, but how can women know that? My ex was a nerdy 'nice guy' and I loved that about him... it turns out that he was cheating on me and was just a bad guy in disguise. Now, I don't trust the guys who are super nice because they'll probably just turn around and be a jerk just like all the others.
The big difference is that most women aren't on the prowl trying to fake it to sleep with as many men as they can. Many men are VERY good at persuading women into thinking they're special, when in reality they're screwing 5 more on the side.
You really think that it's just men alone who do that stuff?
Women play the game just the same darling. Women don't go on the prowl, they go on the hunt for meat like lionesses and cougars in the night! The ones having the most fun will boldly admit that.
Certainly explains why some ladies said I'm already past my prime expiration date nearing 40. Lol. When they get with me and realize what they'll never get from a younger guy, they want more and more and more. Sometimes I'm very glad to oblige. They want and need toe-curling sex with all the intricate pleasures that a guy learns through experience. Young boys don't know how to pleasure, they just know how to f*** really good and that's all. It does get boring so I've been told.
There is a big difference between a nice guy with a personality and a nice guy who's putting on a show. The guy that shows you a bit of back bone with an opinion but treats you nice should be a guy you take a chance on. The nice guy who's agreeing with you to try to get into your pants for his tally is who you want to avoid. Unless your lying to yourself about your true nature, leave him for the girls who just want the slam bams of sex and nothing more. Either way you gotta make a move or do nothing and continue along the excuse path.
You really think that it's just men alone who do that stuff?
Women play the game just the same darling. Women don't go on the prowl, they go on the hunt for meat like lionesses and cougars in the night! The ones having the most fun will boldly admit that.
Certainly explains why some ladies said I'm already past my prime expiration date nearing 40. Lol. When they get with me and realize what they'll never get from a younger guy, they want more and more and more. Sometimes I'm very glad to oblige. They want and need toe-curling sex with all the intricate pleasures that a guy learns through experience. Young boys don't know how to pleasure, they just know how to f*** really good and that's all. It does get boring so I've been told.
There is a big difference between a nice guy with a personality and a nice guy who's putting on a show. The guy that shows you a bit of back bone with an opinion but treats you nice should be a guy you take a chance on. The nice guy who's agreeing with you to try to get into your pants for his tally is who you want to avoid. Unless your lying to yourself about your true nature, leave him for the girls who just want the slam bams of sex and nothing more. Either way you gotta make a move or do nothing and continue along the excuse path.
Well, according to most men on this forum, I'm waaaay past my expiration date since I'll be 29 next month. I'm an old maid, allll used up
I want a man to prove to me he's worth dating. And I want him to need me to prove to him I'm worth dating. It's really as simple as that. We both have obligations and I would prefer to take it slow and really get to know each other before making a leap into a relationship. Unfortunately, most of the men I come across want to push the subject or try to have sex way too fast without actually making an effort to get to know me.
Maybe I'm asking too much and that's probably why I just passed the 3 year mark being single
The purpose of women necessitates men. Swear off us all you want...it's not the worst thing that's happened to us.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
