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You must have missed the article I posted earlier.
Conn. man can seek payment from child's real dad - Houston Chronicle (http://www.chron.com/news/article/Conn-man-can-seek-payment-from-child-s-real-dad-2964715.php - broken link)
I did see your post, and I read this article a few days ago. I didn't mention it because it's still not the norm. I guess I should acknowledged your post to avoid your pointing it out. Either way, thanks for providing the link.
From the article:
Quote:
High-level court rulings allowing cuckolded men to seek such reimbursement are rare, though DNA tests are increasingly accessible to suspicious fathers.
Quote:
A now-retired state Superior Court judge, Clarence Jones, decided in favor of Zollino in December 2009, saying the best interests of the child were more important than the financial interests of Fischer and citing similar court rulings in other states.
Quote:
Jones went on to cite court rulings in similar cases in other states, including Alaska, Nebraska, Nevada and California, where men weren't allowed to sue for damages after learning they weren't their children's biological fathers.
Quote:
The Nebraska court said that when forced to choose between allowing a case "that carries all the detrimental effects of a custody battle or asking a plaintiff to go uncompensated for his emotional pain, we choose the latter."
With this mentality still going on in the court system, wronged fathers have a long way to go.
I don't have a problem with you "kicking him to the curb" if he asked for a paternity test at the hospital. I'm not a supporter of springing that news on a woman who just gave birth. I want men to tell women UPFRONT during the dating stage about their intentions to test any newborn children. This takes your "suspected of cheating" scenario out of the picture since he's approaching it as a general policy.
Of course, not all women will accept being upfront about this, but most women I've dated were completely fine with it. Since I said it while we were getting to know each other, they didn't take it personally.
Right, because upfront he's telling her he'd never trust her through their marriage. I'm thinking he'll have a hard time finding ANY woman willing to be married to a person like. I guess some people are REALLY paranoid though and that's what they feel they need to do to protect themselves.
But, I'll humor this idea. Likewise, she let him know that he needs to share his passwords to e-mail, any and all text messaging, not mind being followed by a PI every so often for the lifetime of their marriage...you know, just to keep him in check. Afterall, why should she have and raise children with someone who could potentially cheat on her?
Yup, quality relationship and marriage material right there.
LOL @ himain. Exactly why I have a dog. Having children with men doesn't pay literally and figuratively. They find some reason to weasel out of it. Being stuck with a baby? No thanks I'll keep the miniature pinscher.
My dear, methinks you have some issues.....................
I did see your post, and I read this article a few days ago. I didn't mention it because it's still not the norm. I guess I should acknowledged your post to avoid your pointing it out. Either way, thanks for providing the link.
From the article:
No its not the norm, but maybe things are starting to change. All it takes is one successful lawsuit and the flood gates open.
Really? 'Cuz I don't see tons of women getting their pay docked monthly because they don't want to support their kids? Really? 'Cuz I don't see sh*tloads of single fathers trying to 'make due' on their little salaries to feed babies and themselves. Really? 'Cuz the common term is 'she's/he's got daddy issues.' Sure there's probably 'she's/he's got mommy issues,' but I said the most common term. But yea, I made it up, that men usually don't care of their kids on the regular. Okay. Yes better safe than sorry.
Umm ok.. Im glad to hear you just want a dog. You made the right choice.
You're welcome. I mean, you spew out different forms of hatred and angst like an Uzi spraying bullets. So Captain Obvious I am.
Get some help. Please.
I guess I should talk to somebody about why that is? Maybe they will tell me things I already know or up my meds? Hmm. Either way, I'm going to make a turkey sandwich and chips.
I don't understand why some women are saying "lulz whatever if my man asked me for a DNA test i'd give him one in exchange to the keys to the house cuz he is out the door mmmhmmm you know i'm right girls!".
Flip the table. Why ya'll so adamant about being trusted when you ladies flip the freak out when a guy wants a little confirmation and reassurance for his investment.
Its different for guys and girls. No I don't speak for most guys however from my point of view ladies need to keep in mind that eggs don't differentiate between who is married and who is in a relationship, who was nice or naughty, or who the person "wants" to get pregnant by. It only takes one time, one sperm out of MILLIONS that are deposited with each...umm..act...to get a woman pregnant. Even if you "bond" with your "hubs" every day of the week but had a quicky on thursday afternoon with some old flame, that one time is all that it could take. You could have just met this guy on the subway and plan to never meet again in each of your lives, the deed is done. If you aren't chained up in the house under lock and key and perhaps get some sunshine every once in a while, there is no telling what could have been done at work/at the market etc. NO, i'm not saying all women are hoes. I'd wager that most women would be sickened at the thought of having a "quicky" HOWEVER that doesn't mean that it doesn't happen.
Versus what women get to experience. It's pretty obvious that the child is yours. You get to grow it for 9 or so months. YOU knew what YOU were doing during the weeks prior to the date of conception. To you, it's clear as day that you had absolutely no other types of relations that could make question of paternity.
Why shouldn't guys have this same type of reassurance? We have the scientific means to 99.99999% ascertain whether or not WE were the ones that "took". It's quick and relatively painless (aside from the emotional pain), and pretty cheap for what it provides. Why do we *have* to take your word on a matter as mentally, physically, and emotionally draining as this? You wouldn't buy a car without inspecting it right? You wouldn't sign a contract without reading what it says and signing on the dotted line. You wouldn't get married to someone you've never met. Why not allow us guys to put fourth the same due diligence and make certain that our responsibility is, well, ours?
Again, i'm making no assumptions and not speaking for ANYONE but myself and the hypothetical "men" in my scenario. So don't come at me guns ablaze CD style :hand:
I think everyone (atleast on this thread, who are apparently somewhat interested in this topic), should read the book "Sperm Wars" and maybe that'll highlight why something as important as paternity simply cannot be taken at face value.
Oh and to stay OT to the OP, I would dump the lady in a heartbeat. I don't know what I would do with the child. I assume I wouldn't just stop all contact however I know I would be physically sickened by the news.
I guess I should talk to somebody about why that is? Maybe they will tell me things I already know or up my meds? Hmm. Either way, I'm going to make a turkey sandwich and chips.
Tryptophan rush, huh? That'll put you to sleep.
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Maybe they will tell me things I already know or up my meds? Hmm. Either way, I'm going to make a turkey sandwich and chips.
