Having children young (diabetes, permanent, mom, younger)
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This past Christmas, a 70 Year old vibrant woman and a 7 year old little girl took a trip to Paris together.Alone. They went to visit the Eiffel Tower, built a snow man and many more exciting things. How are they related? Well the 7 year old is the 70 year olds Great- Grandaughter.
This is only possible when you have your children young. My grandmother and my daughter are like two peas in a pod. My daughter is also very close with my mom,46. My daughter is a healthy happy, well adjusted, (student of the month May 2008 and November 2008) well traveled little girl, and she is the product of a teenage relationship. I am not condoning teenage pregnancy, but I don't think people should put so much focus on money, yeah don't have a kid when your dirt poor, but you don't need to have a six figure income (even combined income) in order to raise happy healthy kids.
Has anyone else seen the correlation between waiting to have kids and the infertility rate? Is that not a sure-fire sign that your body is meant to reproduce at a younger age? Why put it off so long and subject yourself to painful infertility treatments? I Adjust claims for an health insurance company and I see so many infertility claims/ multiple births for women my moms age! Or the correlation between down syndrome babies and maternal age (cough: Sarah Palin) or infertility treatment and Autistic/Low Birth weight babies?
Its up to each individual what they want to do, and I realize some people are still Very immature in their late 20's/ early 30's, but for health reasons alone I hope people realize the importance of having kids before 40!
I have seen people that came from teen parents and I've seen people that came from parents that were older. I've seen people that came from parents that were dirt poor and i've seen people that came from parents that were wealthy. One thing all these people had in common is that all of their children turned out dif. You will find successful people from all kinds of backgrounds and unsuccessful people from all kinds of backgrounds. So really what is everyone's point? Why is everyone arguing..what is good for you may not be good for the next person. No one has a right to tell any of us that the way we lead our life was beneath theirs. We all have our own views but that doesn't make any of them right or wrong.
I have seen people that came from teen parents and I've seen people that came from parents that were older. I've seen people that came from parents that were dirt poor and i've seen people that came from parents that were wealthy. One thing all these people had in common is that all of their children turned out dif. You will find successful people from all kinds of backgrounds and unsuccessful people from all kinds of backgrounds. So really what is everyone's point? Why is everyone arguing..what is good for you may not be good for the next person. No one has a right to tell any of us that the way we lead our life was beneath theirs. We all have our own views but that doesn't make any of them right or wrong.
It is true that some people beat the odds but should we really be gambling with our children's futures? You don't justify taking risks because some people get away with it. This is analgous to driving without your seat belt because most people don't need it in a given day. You don't justify risky behaviors because some people get away with it. Especially when someone else will be asked to pay the price for your actions.
This past Christmas, a 70 Year old vibrant woman and a 7 year old little girl took a trip to Paris together.Alone. They went to visit the Eiffel Tower, built a snow man and many more exciting things. How are they related? Well the 7 year old is the 70 year olds Great- Grandaughter.
This is only possible when you have your children young. My grandmother and my daughter are like two peas in a pod. My daughter is also very close with my mom,46. My daughter is a healthy happy, well adjusted, (student of the month May 2008 and November 2008) well traveled little girl, and she is the product of a teenage relationship. I am not condoning teenage pregnancy, but I don't think people should put so much focus on money, yeah don't have a kid when your dirt poor, but you don't need to have a six figure income (even combined income) in order to raise happy healthy kids.
Has anyone else seen the correlation between waiting to have kids and the infertility rate? Is that not a sure-fire sign that your body is meant to reproduce at a younger age? Why put it off so long and subject yourself to painful infertility treatments? I Adjust claims for an health insurance company and I see so many infertility claims/ multiple births for women my moms age! Or the correlation between down syndrome babies and maternal age (cough: Sarah Palin) or infertility treatment and Autistic/Low Birth weight babies?
Its up to each individual what they want to do, and I realize some people are still Very immature in their late 20's/ early 30's, but for health reasons alone I hope people realize the importance of having kids before 40!
Given that the fertility rate is simply based on the number of births per 1000 among women of a particular age group, the drop isn't something to be that alarmed about (for example, because more women are delaying child birth the fertility rate recently actually increased for women aged 30-34 simply due to the fact more women in this age group are having babies). You really need to compare women who are, actively, trying to have babies. Some of that drop is simply that some women are done having babies at 35. However, even if the drop is significant (and, statistically, it is just not as high as the alarmists scream), it's not reason to have babies before you are ready and equipped to have them. Neither is great grandparents living to see great grand children. In fact having them young enough so that great grand parents do live to see great grand children, literally, adds another generation to an already over populated planet.
Yes, you see more claims for infertility these days but a big part of that is because we have fertility treatments we did not have in the past. Long before we could treat it, there was infertility. That's why they developed infertility treatments. To blame infertility on waiting to have kids is just silly. It's always been there. It is somewhat higher if you wait but not enough to justify bringing children into this world before you've made adequate preparations for them. Better to have none than to have them too soon and have them pay the price.
Edited to add: I have to wonder what will happen with the next generation with so many children born as a result of fertility treatments these days. We could be breeding for fertility problems. If mom had trouble getting pregnant and needed fertility treatments, will she pass this trait on to her daughters? I have a feeling that infertility rates are going to climb for this reason alone. Of course it will be another 30 or so years before I can test that theoryn and I probably won't be here.
Last edited by Ivorytickler; 02-08-2009 at 05:36 AM..
This past Christmas, a 70 Year old vibrant woman and a 7 year old little girl took a trip to Paris together.Alone. They went to visit the Eiffel Tower, built a snow man and many more exciting things. How are they related? Well the 7 year old is the 70 year olds Great- Grandaughter.
This is only possible when you have your children young. My grandmother and my daughter are like two peas in a pod. My daughter is also very close with my mom,46. My daughter is a healthy happy, well adjusted, (student of the month May 2008 and November 2008) well traveled little girl, and she is the product of a teenage relationship. I am not condoning teenage pregnancy, but I don't think people should put so much focus on money, yeah don't have a kid when your dirt poor, but you don't need to have a six figure income (even combined income) in order to raise happy healthy kids.
Has anyone else seen the correlation between waiting to have kids and the infertility rate? Is that not a sure-fire sign that your body is meant to reproduce at a younger age? Why put it off so long and subject yourself to painful infertility treatments? I Adjust claims for an health insurance company and I see so many infertility claims/ multiple births for women my moms age! Or the correlation between down syndrome babies and maternal age (cough: Sarah Palin) or infertility treatment and Autistic/Low Birth weight babies?
Its up to each individual what they want to do, and I realize some people are still Very immature in their late 20's/ early 30's, but for health reasons alone I hope people realize the importance of having kids before 40!
Amen to this. I've read through this thread, and it really seems like certain individuals are not at peace with their own choices, hence the need to justify them and lobby for them by juxtaposing them against the most severe circumstances (i.e. teen mothers, entrenched in poverty, etc.).
Many people who have their children in their 20s - which I consider the norm, if not the ideal age (provided they are stable, in a loving and healthy relationship, which is indeed possible for many who are not trying to prolong their adolescence) for beginning one's family - do just fine.
I was way too busy careerwise in my 20s to have children. Now I have the time and the financial security to give them everything they need (in early 30s). And my wife can quit her job and stay at home with them should we choose.
I think that being financially and emotionally secure and having enough time for your kids is the most important thing. If you can do that earlier, great for you. Most young parents I know are financially struggling. Kids are expensive. A lot of younger parents both have to work to make ends meet. Hence, daycare.
I just don't think I would have enjoyed that kind of additional stress in my 20s. And no daycare for us.
Amen to this. I've read through this thread, and it really seems like certain individuals are not at peace with their own choices, hence the need to justify them and lobby for them by juxtaposing them against the most severe circumstances (i.e. teen mothers, entrenched in poverty, etc.).
Many people who have their children in their 20s - which I consider the norm, if not the ideal age (provided they are stable, in a loving and healthy relationship, which is indeed possible for many who are not trying to prolong their adolescence) for beginning one's family - do just fine.
I love this "debate" response. Yes, anyone who thinks there's a better way than the way it's always been done MUST feel ill at ease with their choices.
The only way I'd feel ill at ease with my choices would be if I'd had my children too young given what I know about the risks involved in having children too young. Just the divorce stat alone for young couples is scary. Divorce really tears kids apart. Yes, there's that rare case where mom and dad put their differences aside for the kids but it's rare and even then divorce is not good for kids.
Here's a thought. Maybe some of us are saying that waiting is a good thing because it is. That has nothing to do with our personal choices.
I was way too busy careerwise in my 20s to have children. Now I have the time and the financial security to give them everything they need (in early 30s). And my wife can quit her job and stay at home with them should we choose.
I think that being financially and emotionally secure and having enough time for your kids is the most important thing. If you can do that earlier, great for you. Most young parents I know are financially struggling. Kids are expensive. A lot of younger parents both have to work to make ends meet. Hence, daycare.
I just don't think I would have enjoyed that kind of additional stress in my 20s. And no daycare for us.
One of the perks of waiting to have kids for me was that my career was established so I didn't have to work long hours and I'd been around long enough to have acrued 6 weeks vacation time. It was nice being in a position where I could, easily, balance career and home and could afford high quality day care. As a result I didn't feel I needed to quit my job, which was nice since we could live better on two incomes than one.
I have friends who did as you and your wife are doing. Spent their 20's saving so they could quit when they had kids. It's nice when you get to have the lifestyle you want and less stress is good for everyone. Financial security should not be underrated.
No one said they're idiots. Just they're not mature. What is your logic for thinking people should have children before they mature? Seems like common sense to me that waiting until you mature is a good thing. Why do you think it's bad to wait until you're mature? or better that you have kids before you mature? Or even the same? Seems to me there'd be a difference between mature and immature and one would be prefferable to the other.
This is the thing with many americans. They always treat people based on some "scientific" study that found people under a certain age group are not "mature" due to their brain. I guess the reason why there was so much war in the ancient times was because of those 14yr old kings going around wanting to kill their enemies because they were immature. I mean we have leaders in their 40s and beyond and when do they do any corrupt things?
And I guess those states who trial 14yr olds as adults need to revise their laws because its proven these kids are not mature yet.
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As to those 40 year olds, age is necessary but not sufficient for maturity. Some people never grow up but most do, given time. Some need more time than others. The fact some never grow up doesn't negate the fact that age is necessary to attain maturity, if one is going to attain it.
But do you realize that just because their brain is mature(d) doesn't mean they are going to be capable of acting better than an adult with an immature brain? Does that make sense? People have concises to act "right" in their given circumstances. It has nothing to do with the brain being "matured"
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Or the correlation between down syndrome babies and maternal age (cough: Sarah Palin) or infertility treatment and Autistic/Low Birth weight babies?
