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One of the reasons my husband is going is because he is the lease holder. He can call the sheriff and have her arrested for criminal trespass.
I don’t put it past her to get pregnant by some random guy and blame my son.
(And obviously I told her I was not going to share a private legal document with her.)
I certainly hope that it doesn't come to that, i.e. needing to call the sheriff.
Your son sounds like a kind, decent human, if a bit idealistic and naive.
Hopefully, two of the lessons that he takes away from this experience are a.) don't take in stray humans and b.) said strays always manage to land on their feet no matter how sad a tale they might tell in order to stay in the good graces of the kind-hearted person who takes them in. There's always another fool waiting in the wings to swoop in and play the role of rescuer. This young woman will easily find another knight in shining armor to rescue her from her mean parents and having to work for a living.
If your spouse has any contact whatsoever with this woman once he gets there, make sure there is a third party in attendance, preferably the landlord. Your husband needs to be very wary about what he says and does in her presence. The landlord should serve the notice of eviction notice and escort her off the property. You don't want her to be able to make a claim of abuse.
Your son really sounds like he has a particular syndrome in which he feels he has to save a damsel in distress. There is a vile, disgusting term for it that I don't subscribe to.
The "acceptable in polite company" phrase for this is White Knight complex.
Get with the LL to give your son a 3 day notice to quit the premise because of a person he moved in who's now living there who's not on the lease. Once the notice arrives pack your son's things and move him out. Break the lease, pay any break-lease penalties. Leave her there. It's the LL's headache at that point. He will serve an eviction on her. Main thing is that she doesn't accuse him of anything. Is she a minor? That's another headache. What if he's guilty of statutory rape? Get him away from her as quick as possible.
Wow. What a mess for your son to have gotten himself into!
On the bright side (if there is one), she's unlikely to make a legit suicide attempt but is simply upping the ante to guilt your son into persuading you into letting her stay with him. All of this manufactured drama reveals the truth: she never had any intention of *not* trying to move in with your son from the get-go. Hopefully, your son has the wherewithal to have told her that if she's is threating suicide, he's going to take the threat seriously and call a mental health professional on her behalf/give her the number for the national suicide prevention hotline.
This is the last thing that your son needs as he's trying to pursue his studies. I hope that he can stay strong and not give in to her demands. Threating suicide as a means of control is emotional abuse.
At this point in time, as much as your son might not wish to do this, he needs to document everything she says and does in order to protect himself. Be sure that he sends you the info as well so she can't erase or alter it.
Last edited by Formerly Known As Twenty; 09-15-2022 at 07:47 PM..
Sounds to me like your son needs to hop a plane and come home for a nice long visit and the landlord needs to change the locks while he's gone. Like I'm talking send her out to buy bagels and get the heck out of there while she's gone. And of course he needs to be sure she hasn't duplicated his key before he leaves.
It sounds like a good idea to get the son out of there for awhile, his leaving might make her forget about him and move on. If the father/landlord get her out, there is no guarantee she won't return to harass the son, especially since she comes from a toxic family, then they would have to get a restraining order against her.
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