When looking young is weird

[oh-eve]

Originally Posted by coschristi

I've been told by 4 different family members this week, that I reminded them of my mom. Both times involved them seeing me from a distance, walking towards them.

I don't think they mean because of my face, because everybody, especially family, knows that we don't share any facial features.

My mom aged very quickly in the last 10 years she was alive because she had a nutrient absorption disorder caused by a surgery for ulcers she had in her 30's. That surgery has since been banned; it's essentially a gastric bypass & had a high 5-year mortality rate. By the time she died at age 75, she looked like she was in her 90's. If it wasn't for her degrees in science & nutrition, she never would have made it even that far. She weighed only 75 lbs when she died, despite having been 5'10" as a full grown woman (shrunk several inches as she aged).

I suspect I was told this because I've lost 102 lbs over the last 2 years. I think my family is seeing me "thin" & at age 54, it's translating as "frail", like my mom looked. I'm almost 5'11" & a very healthy weight for my height: 155 lbs. I don't think I look frail. I'm actually quite strong & I feel great. I initially had only set out to lose 70 lbs, because I think women in their 50's are healthier if they are about 20 lbs heavier but the weight just kept coming off & I'm now just about 10 lbs heavier than when I was in high school.

I am still told all the time that it's "weird" that my oldest child is 36, because "you don't look old enough to have a kid in their mid-30's". Maybe it's because I am always wearing activewear & keep my hair past my waist (but it's going white, lol) & I do appreciate the "compliments" but sometimes it does feel weird, or kind of awkward.

You do not look frail or too thin. Thin is a compliment in my opinion if someone says you are thin. You are very beautiful. You are the prettiest City Data Member here from all the pictures I have seen.

And I agree, you do not look like you could have a 36 year old child

[coschristi]

Originally Posted by oh-eve

You do not look frail or too thin. Thin is a compliment in my opinion if someone says you are thin. You are very beautiful. You are the prettiest City Data Member here from all the pictures I have seen.

And I agree, you do not look like you could have a 36 year old child

Thank you so much!

[smt1111]

There's a certain style that high school girls used to wear--the Bermuda length cargo pants with the ties hanging down, round toed flats, and spaghetti strap tank layered under a shirt. One of my coworkers in her 40's used to dress like this all the time, with the ankle bracelet and the tiny pink purse.

Looking more youthful is fine in small doses but not adopting an entire high school girl look. Maybe wear the pants with nice sandals and a beautiful slub knit sweater and carry a nice bag. One fad or trend at a time, don't overdo it.

Also saw a woman in her 70's in ultra skinny jeans and extremely high platform shoes and sort of thought she overdid it. She's an attractive woman and her body can handle the skinny jeans but maybe tone it down a bit to slim cut and nice high heeled boots rather than a teetering platform shoe.

On the other hand, wearing whatever you like is someone's right. Just know that you might look like you're trying too hard to look too young.