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I've wondered for a while when someone looks so young (convincingly enough) for his or her age that to some it's a social negative and I guess a sign of physical or mental underdevelopment. Tonight I thought, When it makes the person look in the wrong stage of life. High schooler as middle-school student, 40-year-old man as on-the-prowl 30-year-old, Madonna as not elderly....
A 17 year old looking 12 is bad, a 40 yr old looking 30 is good. Madonna - well that speaks for itself.
I guess people could get in trouble if they look like they are in a totally different stage of life, for instance being pursued by younger people than they might want or being expected to behave a certain way because they seem so young.
Your 3 examples are extremely broad and quite different. Growing up, the physical maturity from MS to HS is huge (even from freshman to senior). So, kids that lag a bit due sometimes have additional social anxiety or struggles (maybe not being as athletic, or not getting dates, etc.) because the difference can be pronounced and 'growing up' is an important mental thing to many kids at those ages who are becoming aware of their impending adulthood.
For Madonna, you're talking an entirely separate thing with lots of plastic surgery (and then on top of that, significant digital touch ups) to make someone look completely artificial. Almost uncanny valley effect. We know someone is mature but they look completely unrealistically and artificially ”young” in a way that they themselves never looked young to begin with.
But a 40 year old man looking close to 30? I honestly don't find that strange or that close to the other 2 examples you gave that contain more complex societal issues attached to them. In fact, as someone in my late 30s, I would say that the 30s/40s are such a toss up trying to guess peoples' ages. I know guys and girls who are in their 40s who easily pass at 30s and nothing is weird about it. I also see people in their late 30s I would guess were mid to late 40s if i didn't know better. Weight, physique, lifestyle (alcohol, tobacco, other), fashion, confidence, hair loss (I was balding and shaved my head so I'm not saying anything negative), kids/no kids, hair color/dye, facial hair, etc. all have a pretty big impact on how old someone appears.
I can see it being a bit of embarrassment if half of a couple looks younger than their actual age and the other party looks older than their age. Such as when checking into a hotel, and they think your wife is your daughter. Or when a parent of a child looks too young to be the parent, and they have to produce ID to prove they are old enough to be the parent of their kid.
I remember buying a beer once at a festival and they carded me at age 35 or 36ish, but not my brother, who is 7 years younger. He has always looked older than his real age, which I guess is lucky since his wife is 7 years his senior.
I live in a community of folks mostly over 55. It's amazing how young some look for their age, as well as others who look much older than their real age.
I definitely think it is relative to your own frame of reference, circle of friends/family, etc. I have friends in one state who dress and style themselves much younger than my friends of the same age group in another part of the country.
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It's hard to look either too young or too old for your actual age. I went to college with a girl who looked 50, although she was 20. She was heavy, for some reason had grey streaks in her hair, and was constantly told it's great that you've decided to return to education and get your degree. At an interview, an interviewer flat out didn't believe her that she was under 40.
I have a niece who is 35, and she looks like a middle schooler. She's a speech therapist and so is in different schools in the district, and although she wears an employee badge it's not believed she's not a student.
On rare occasion, we've had women posting here, who say they can't get the attention of any guys their age, because they're often mistaken for teenagers (two of these women were in their 30's). This is more typical of women who are petite, but can happen to others, as well.
It can be a real hindrance socially, and for some--professionally. I knew a woman who had been practicing law for 15 years, but when she wore her power suit for the courtroom, people would comment that she looked like she was wearing her mother's clothes. (It's amazing what people will blurt out.) A friend of mine when attending academic conferences, would routinely get shut out of the networking and hob-mobbing that went on, because she was mistaken for a student intern helping out. Everyone would be surprised to discover, that she was one of the featured presenters and a known authority in her field. Suddenly, after her presentations, everyone would want to talk to her, realizing that she was someone important and influential.
I think there are probably a lot of stories like this from women, and a few from men, as well.
Last edited by Ruth4Truth; 03-05-2022 at 10:31 AM..
It's hard to look either too young or too old for your actual age. I went to college with a girl who looked 50, although she was 20. She was heavy, for some reason had grey streaks in her hair, and was constantly told it's great that you've decided to return to education and get your degree. At an interview, an interviewer flat out didn't believe her that she was under 40.
I have a niece who is 35, and she looks like a middle schooler. She's a speech therapist and so is in different schools in the district, and although she wears an employee badge it's not believed she's not a student.
It's an irritation.
Wow... that's crazy and very rare. Why does she look so young? Is she under 5' and very skinny?
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