Are the black men colorstruck here ? (Chicago, Washington: swimming, friendly, rating)

[RiverRise]

Originally Posted by Lisa2013

Good for you, but don't make the mistake of thinking that most black guys are like your father and brothers.

No, because that would be horrible.

[Mr.Bourgeois]

Originally Posted by Lisa2013

You are foolish to believe that people are not conditioned everyday by the media. If you lived in Africa and all of the programs and advertisements ONLY featured women with dark skin, your loins would be conditioned to like that, even if there were other types of women in your community.

Hotness is determined by each culture. The media can condition you to alter your ideas and perceptions. There are many subliminal messages in every form of entertainment. After a while, you begin to blindly accept certain things as reality or the truth.

So for the African American women that were born in America that date Caucasian men: Are they brain washed as well???

[Mr.Bourgeois]

Originally Posted by Lisa2013

It's because they don't see dark skin as hot. They would take Kim Kardashian over Naomi Campbell in her prime, but a lot of white guys would prefer Naomi over Kim if it was just based on looks alone.

Well, why aren't Caucasian men marrying women like that? I mean in droves, not one here or one there??? I am really trying to understand.

[allen2323]

I have a fairly general question to all of the black women commenting. How many of you are actually single? And what are your age ranges? I just find it hard to believe that this is such an issue for black women. Obviously you ladies have been hurt out there. And it's so sad to hear about it. Have any of you tried online dating? What has been your experience with online dating?

[RiverRise]

Anyway, back on topic for a second:

nyanna, you seem to have a really good head on your shoulders and from what I can tell from your posts, you are intelligent as well. The bests post in this thread, IMO, come from Indentured Servant. I think you should work on your confidence as well. Even if you have to fake it 'til you make it. If a guy doesn't like you because of your skin color it's his loss. Sometimes it's very hard not to internalize other people's opinion of us, but you have to remember that their "preferences" are a reflection of them, not you.

[BajanYankee]

Originally Posted by vicnice

You also know what drives you towards women that you call attractive, it just ain't "loins" that's a gross over simplification. It has to do with TV, radio, magazines and all other things that stimulate our sensories.

Uh oh.

Blind men prefer a low waist-to-hip ratio | Mendeley

The study involved men who had been sightless from birth. The idea was that the bombardment of visual media — of models on billboards and actresses on television and porn stars online — which may be so powerful and even dominant in molding desire, couldn’t have had any direct effect on these men, who emerged from the womb into a congenital dark. Would their tastes in women’s bodies match those of men who could see?

MOD EDIT

The Anatomy of Desire - NYTimes.com

[Mr.Bourgeois]

Originally Posted by BajanYankee

Most fashion models are not very attractive. They often get the most anorexic and "exotic" looking women they can find. Those women are so out of the norm that it's not even fair to use them as comparators. Again, there are a lot of black men who marry dark-skinned, attractive, non-model black women.



So do you think that the scores of black men currently married to dark-skinned women would ditch those women as soon as a Hillary Clinton lookalike walked their way?



You're not going to buy it because you refuse to accept reality. Men are attracted to beauty--plain and simple--and for the most part, an attractive black woman's face has more in common with an attractive white woman's face than it does with an ugly black woman's face. A small jaw, dainty nose, large eyes, and a 0.7 waist-to-hip ratio are all universally attractive to men. There's no getting around that. Your whining is about as futile as men complaining about girls going for the tall guys, the popular guys, the high status guys, etc. Instead of blaming the white power stucture for your dating hardships, why don't you pursue a Ph.D in genetics and learn to reprogram human nature.

Excellent post

[RiverRise]

Originally Posted by allen2323

I have a fairly general question to all of the black women commenting. How many of you are actually single? And what are your age ranges? I just find it hard to believe that this is such an issue for black women. Obviously you ladies have been hurt out there. And it's so sad to hear about it. Have any of you tried online dating? What has been your experience with online dating?

I am single, 22-34 range. Honestly, I'm also baffled when topics like this come up. I've never had a problem attracting black men. I choose not to date because I don't want to at this time, but I'm sure if I did I wouldn't have any problem finding potentials. Then again, I don't really have a type. Not in the physical sense. I am more attracted to the conversation you bring. Maybe if I were actively trying to find a boyfriend I'd run into these issues.

[Lisa2013]

Originally Posted by nyanna

she's white with blonde hair--stereotypical features that many have been conditioned to find attractive. For some reason, I have a hard time believing a Black guy would genuinely dig a chick like that, it just seems like he would like a woman is darker and more ethnic looking. She seems really bland to me

She does look very bland and unappealing, but seriously most black guys want whatever white guys have, yet they call us insecure. That guy bajan had the nerve to post westernized studies to try to assert his point. He's so brainwashed to believe that he just woke up being sexually attracted to white women. Unless he's a white or biracial man, I'm just not buying that crap.

If the media wanted to, they could make most westernized men prefer dark women with natural hair over blondes. As strange as it may sound, all that they would need to do is feature these women in most movies, print-ads, magazines and create articles which listed very positive aspects about being in relationships with dark women. Imagine if a man walked into a store and every woman on the cover of the magazine was a dark black woman. Imagine if all of the movies featured dark women in leading and appealing roles. Imagine if almost every article featured about dark woman was positive. Now at the same time, imagine if every image of white blonds was negative. Trust that you could change a person's perceptions very quickly by altering images.

What would also occur is, various women that didn't have the features of dark women with natural hair, would try their hardest to copy the look, so they too could be viewed as appealing.

Most black people go to the theatre looking to get entertained, but they don't realize that everything in advertisements and in movies are meant to influence you on a subconscious level. For example, take a look at the trailer for the movie, jumping the broom. You will notice that the movie features an attractive biracial woman (Paula Patton) as the lead. This was no mistake, it could have featured the equally attractive darker woman (Meagan good). Instead she is casted as her over demanding friend, who just expects too much from men and doesn't know how to just be nice and non bitchy. Paula tells Meagan to just settle and relax her standards, but notice that Paula, in the movie did not settle LOL. This chick went out and got a successful high earning man. The viewing audience will accept the subliminal message that Paula deserved to get a high earning man that can support a family and provide a nice lifestyle, while Megan doesn't deserve anything because she's just a trifling gold digger. LOL

They will subconsciously accept that lighter women are kind and pleasant and deserve to be taken care of, while darker woman are loud and only after a man's money.

I didn't watch the movie because I'd never support such crap, but the trailer speaks volumes. At the very minimum, ask yourself why wasn't Megan Good, Gabrielle Union or Keri Washington casted into the leading role. I'm sure they auditioned for the part, since there's a scarcity of roles for black actresses in hollywood. I recall seeing one clip with Nia Long stating that the same black actresses compete for the same limited roles.

Do you really think it was by mistake that biracial Paula Patton got the role?
No, it's all apart of social conditioning. It upholds the belief that the Paula Patton types deserve the world, while the opposite is true for darker women.
Black folks digest this crap on a daily basis. Then sit back and say, I just prefer light skinned and white women.

[Mr.Bourgeois]

Originally Posted by Lisa2013

She does look very bland and unappealing, but seriously most black guys want whatever white guys have, yet they call us insecure. That guy bajan had the nerve to post westernized studies to try to assert his point. He's so brainwashed to believe that he just woke up being sexually attracted to white women. Unless he's a white or biracial man, I'm just not buying that crap.

If the media wanted to, they could make most westernized men prefer dark women over blondes. As strange as it may sound, all that they would need to do is feature these women in most movies, print-ads, magazines and create articles which listed very positive aspects about being in relationships with dark women. Imagine if a man walked into a store and every woman on the cover of the magazine was a dark black woman. Imagine if all of the movies featured dark women in leading and appealing roles. Imagine if almost every article featured about dark woman was positive. Now at the same time, imagine if every image of white blonds was negative. Trust that you could change a person's perceptions very quickly by altering images.

Most black people go to the theatre looking to get entertained, but they don't realize that everything in advertisements and in movies are meant to influence you on a subconscious level. For example, take a look at the trailer for the movie, jumping the broom.

You will notice that the movie features an attractive biracial woman (Paula Patton) as the lead. This was no mistake, it could have featured the equally attractive darker woman (Meagan good). Instead she is casted as her over demanding friend, who just expects too much from men and doesn't know how to just be nice and non bitchy.

Paula tells Meagan to just settle and relax her standards, but notice that Paula, in the movie did not settle LOL. This chick went out and got a successful high earning man. The viewing audience will accept the subliminal message that Paula deserved to get a high earning man that can support a family and provide a nice lifestyle, while Megan doesn't deserve anything because she's just a trifling gold digger. LOL

They will subconsciously accept that lighter women are kind and pleasant and deserve to be taken care of, while darker woman are loud and only after a man's money.

I didn't watch the movie because I'd never support such crap, but the trailer speaks volumes. At the very minimum, ask yourself why wasn't Megan Good, Gabrielle Union or Keri Washington casted into the leading role. I'm sure they auditioned for the part, since there's a scarcity of roles for black actresses in hollywood. I recall seeing one clip with Nia Long stating that the same black actresses would be competing for the same limited roles.

Do you really think it was by mistake that biracial Paula Patton got the role?
No, it's all apart of social conditioning. It upholds the belief that the Paula Patton types deserve the world, while the opposite is true for darker women.
Black folks digest this crap on a daily basis. Then sit back and say, I just prefer light skinned and white women.

The media is not controlled by African American men. It's ok to marry the men that control the media???