Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
your friend should have lied and left off the gap. just say he worked there until recently like a couple/few months ago. and if he has friends at his old job...they could probably vouch for him if the company that interviewed him called or something.
even though it's 2017 and this is changing for the better...there are still some companies here and there that discriminate against stay at home dad's. it's unfortunate..but i don't think you can take that chance if you're looking for a job to have a gap because you took care of your children.
If he was using a recruiter that would have appeared extremely badly on the person doing the work to help him find those jobs and get in doors if it came out his work history was not accurate.
Lying to a recruiter is a good way to get blacklisted from recruiting agencies
If he was using a recruiter that would have appeared extremely badly on the person doing the work to help him find those jobs and get in doors if it came out his work history was not accurate.
Lying to a recruiter is a good way to get blacklisted from recruiting agencies
See I was just thinking I would have lied and made something up about trying to start my own business, or helping someone else who was trying to start their own business. Like something that made it sound like you were being industrious still, but it just wasn't the right choice for you after all, something difficult or impossible to verify or disprove. You'd just need to remember your story and keep it straight across the board.
Fake it 'till ya make it?
My requirements for a stay at home parent would be:
1. We can afford it.
2. You are doing mentally healthy things for yourself (more important than some might realize.)
3. You're making some effort and not letting our home become a disaster.
I only know one man who was very successful as a SAHD. He was a disabled vet in Florida whose wife was a nurse, and they had like four kids or something. His oldest graduated at the top of his class, he was an excellent father, really raised those kids right. With more than two kids, if you're not both making really good money doing something, or if you don't have a relative to care for the kids, it does not make any sense for both parents to even try to work and pay someone to care for them. Childcare costs are insane. And since he was a disabled vet, he got a check from the VA, so he had that money to contribute.
See I was just thinking I would have lied and made something up about trying to start my own business, or helping someone else who was trying to start their own business. Like something that made it sound like you were being industrious still, but it just wasn't the right choice for you after all, something difficult or impossible to verify or disprove. You'd just need to remember your story and keep it straight across the board.
I read a lot of Ask A Manager, and she always says to not lie about the gap in employment, nor to use non-work experience as a substitute professional experience. Her advice is to stay networked in with former colleagues, maybe take classes in order to stay as up-to-date as possible, and understand that it's going to be harder for anyone with a gap on the resume, especially when hiring managers have a pile of people with recent experience. That said, no one should be shamed for taking time out to deal with family.
The problem is when you try to go back to work. If you have a gap in your resume, it is not uncommon for a women to say I raised my children and no one bats an eye.But, a man says that.........eek, he will be looked at sideways and scrutinized intensely. Men are looked at as "bums" or "lazy" if they would choose to stay at home.
Maybe years ago, but it's certainly not like that today. Employers don't care if you raised kids, were PTA president, or whatever volunteer work you did; they only care about the gap in paid employment. When I was interviewing, the one thing that counted against me was the fact that I was an at-home mom for 12 years. Never mind that I had just graduated college with an accounting degree (earned while raising 3 small children) and ran my eBay store in between semesters, I got the same question every time: "So, you haven't been employed for 12 years?" The job I did get, my second interview consisted of one discussion question: "Are you ready to go back to work?"
I read a lot of Ask A Manager, and she always says to not lie about the gap in employment, nor to use non-work experience as a substitute professional experience. Her advice is to stay networked in with former colleagues, maybe take classes in order to stay as up-to-date as possible, and understand that it's going to be harder for anyone with a gap on the resume, especially when hiring managers have a pile of people with recent experience. That said, no one should be shamed for taking time out to deal with family.
It's also a fireable offense to lie on a resume or job application.
Maybe years ago, but it's certainly not like that today. Employers don't care if you raised kids, were PTA president, or whatever volunteer work you did; they only care about the gap in paid employment. When I was interviewing, the one thing that counted against me was the fact that I was an at-home mom for 12 years. Never mind that I had just graduated college with an accounting degree (earned while raising 3 small children) and ran my eBay store in between semesters, I got the same question every time: "So, you haven't been employed for 12 years?" The job I did get, my second interview consisted of one discussion question: "Are you ready to go back to work?"
Weird.
My wife still gets phone calls all the time asking her to come interview for jobs (bc of her security licenses).
She keeps her licenses and CE up and stays in contact with folks in the industry. But she's getting cold-called for jobs.
My son has 9 years left in the Army. His wife will be a licensed Architect within the next few years. It would not surprise me in the slightest if he became a sahd after he retires. He has a degree, but she will be making $200 an hour, and they want a bunch of kids.
We don't have kids, but it wouldn't be an issue for either of us, if we did. I guess we have always been "co-CEO's" or co-POTUS's LOL. We've been married 30 years, been together longer & have always been egalitarian. We don't really have any use for "traditional" roles. We do what works for us. We've never had a situation where someone has had to be the ultimate decision maker, we're both analysts, so if we disagree, we analyze the problem, do research & make a decision together. We're in it together for better or worse.
It wouldn't matter to either of us who stayed home with kids, if anyone. It does help probably that we have both made roughly the same amount of money & we were both high earners. We've hired out housekeeping for many years now, though when I (female half) first retired, I felt like I "should" do the housework. He didn't though. We'd in the past, always shared housework & we still do, in between cleanings. We skew traditional on some chores & non traditional on others. The older we get, the more of everything we hire out LOL. We're both pragmatic, so if one way out-earned the other, the low earner would probably stay home with kids, regardless of gender.
That's interesting, because I'd always thought that military guys have that kind of tidiness drilled into them (NPI).
They have to be neat at work, so some of them let their hair down at home and over compensate by never putting anything away
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
