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Have any other guys gotten sick of girls telling them they're "bad texters?" I understand we have busy lives and whatnot but it doesn't take but 1 minute to say "hey I'm busy ttyl" instead you'll hear NOTHING at all. It's like one minute she takes .2 seconds to respond to your texts for hours, then BAM! Nothing, even though iMessage says she read your message. Ladies we don't need to keep you in check knowing brushing your doing but if you get busy let us know, don't just leave us hanging.
Sometimes it worse than that, sometimes girls take hours to reply to a simple "hey what's up" the reply of kts not the one worded "hey" is usually "sorry I'm a bad texter" BS you're not a bad texter, you're just texting 64 other dudes. These same girls who claim to be such "bad texters" CONSTANTLY have their phones in their hand when you do go on a date with them.
Ladies you need to stop that crap, it's just rude.
One of my major red flags with women is a bad texter.
Wow. You sound very controlling. I would drop you like a hot phone.
That pretty much describes the way me and the guy I'm seeing text throughout the day. Random thoughts, no real beginning or end and it's definitely not a 'normal' conversation flow. Something will happen at work so he'll text me a little blurb about it and I'll comment on it, and I'll see someone dressed up as Finn From Adventure Time on the subway so I'll text him about it. Every once in a while one of us will remember to text good morning, or good night...but it's not too often. It's just random musings throughout the day.
JetJockey, you're in a situation the OP is trying to be in. When you have a feeling that someone has interest in you, you don't care as much about them texting you every minute of the day. It's when you're in the trial period of getting to know someone where those gaps in communication generally means that they aren't interested. You should have a little understanding, since you had some dating woes of your own. Do I think the OP has a little tendency to be controlling? Sure, but who doesn't have a little bit of a controlling tendency. Who sits back and accepts everything that is thrown at them?
OP is just frustrated, since he did text someone to say hey and all of a sudden they remember 72 hours. I understand I don't live there, but you can't offer up 1 hour of time while I'm in town, and if you can't, you can't communicate that to me? I have friends that let me know they are coming into town and they want to get together for lunch. They tell me what days they are free and I let them know if I"m free that day. If I'm not free, I tell them such and see if we can possibly slide in a dinner. If not, then maybe slide by where they are staying for a bit to catch up.
If you don't want to see someone, just say it and I'll give you all the space you need. I'm not wanting to waste your time or waste my time as well. As people, we hope for explanations of why things don't work as they should, but we aren't deserving to receive it. We're talking about two people trying meet on the same page and you barely know anything about each other.
The OP is taking the right path and just backing off. He clearly was trying to initiate conversation more than other people were wanting too and his feelings got hurt. We're humans and it happens to all of us. Relationships, any way you slice them, rely heavily on if your two lives sync up. If the other person is too busy, and can't make the time, it's best not to be emotionally dumped on when they have the time to talk. If they don't have time to be a genuine friend then I'm not going to have the time to be a genuine friend either. Forcing emotions and feelings just creates resentment. Most people expect reciprocosity, because our time is valuable to us.
You sound horribly controlling and like you really enjoy playing games to mess with people.
I was so expecting you to say that if I was controlling. Believe me, I'm far from it. If I was controlling, I would tell them to do whenever I tell them to.
Quote:
Originally Posted by JetJockey
The bolded, however...it seems like you want her to think it's a date, when in reality you just want to catch up...so which is it? Is she a friend, or are you just keeping her around hoping that she'll eventually sleep with you?
Maybe I was trying to keep up with her and be nice to her. More like a friend, I just didn't want to say that because I wouldn't know what she think of that. It doesn't matter anyway, she should say yes or no. I actually marked that day on my phone for the next day in case since she said she was going to respond back that night.
Quote:
Originally Posted by JetJockey
She's not inconsiderate, she's treating you like a generic friend while you're expecting her to treat you like a romantic partner.
So, if I called her and never got a response until three days later, she's still not inconsiderate? Either that or it's plain unreliable. That goes for any other girls. I would expect to at least get a response anyway, whether it is a friend or not. Guys don't like to be ignored, girls know that.
I was far from being romantic and she would have no idea that if I was because I take it extremely slow. It doesn't matter anyway, I haven't heard from her since last December.
You think a girl not responding to text is going to answer. Nah. That'll just make him look more needy.
You older folk need to get off this phone high horse on the text threads with the younger generation. It is the normal form of communication for twenty something and below for simple conversation such as making plans and light flirting
Church right here. Thank you. I don't even know why you bothered to reply to the detractors that responded to you.
No wonder I stopped posting on this side of town, I couldn't take the same drivel from the usual suspects - I couldn't even make it through the thread. Married people in their 40's thinking their advice to 20 year olds is relevant is hilarious.
I'm not in the dating scene, but if I were, I would ignore a guy who texted "hey what's up." What are you trying to initiate? A conversation? Just call her. Do you want to see her? Then ask "What are you up to tonight?"
Also, punctuation. That's a huge thing for me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by fleetiebelle
I definitely agree with that. "what's up?" is the worst. Ask me something. Tell me something. "What's up?" just tells me that you're bored and want me to entertain you, which I generally do not do over text.
Standard answer to that is "He2+." Then when they write back, "huh?" don't respond.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hawk J
The Daniel Booners put a string between two Porknbean cans, to talk......
You would hate me because I hate texting and I don't like to talk on the phone.
I take time to respond to texts because I always misplace my phone and I am not just not a "texty". I always think that if something is extremely urgent, the person might just give me a call. My friends know me and they don't get mad if I don't text them back right away. At first they were annoyed but they got it.
I am more disappointed in people who think that I have my cell phone glued to my fingers and expect me to respond right away or within hours to their texts. I had a thing with this guy once, and we only texted. We never spoke on the phone. So I made it a point to set the tone of my preferred communication channel from the beginning of all future relationships/dates: I won't spend 3 months texting you. We should either meet or have a phone conversation from time to time, but I will not spend 3 months texting you.
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