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Interesting discussion. I could be considered the strong silent type EXCEPT I lack confidence. I'm pretty quiet and women have complained I'm a terrible communicator. I'm aware of it and am trying to improve. I want to be a good partner if I ever find a good woman again. I'll never be a charismatic sweet talker, but hopefully being more secure in my own skin will eventually attract someone. Of course, I have to relocate for that to happen.
You aren't in a terrible place. If you aren't good at communicating you might want to read books and do courses (even expensive ones, it might be worth it for you) on how to be better at expressing yourself. The fact you acknowledge the problem means you are self aware and capable of finding a solution.
You will definitely find a good woman as soon as you overcome your shortcomings and feel comfortable with yourself.
You aren't in a terrible place. If you aren't good at communicating you might want to read books and do courses (even expensive ones, it might be worth it for you) on how to be better at expressing yourself. The fact you acknowledge the problem means you are self aware and capable of finding a solution.
You will definitely find a good woman as soon as you overcome your shortcomings and feel comfortable with yourself.
Thanks for saying that. I've been aware of these issues for a long time, and started working on them a lot after my divorce 7 years ago. I've done workshops, read books, therapy, etc. People tell me all the time they don't understand why I'm not extremely confident. I don't understand it either. I just beat myself up so much over past mistakes. My silence and shyness are mistaken for arrogance. I hate that. Anyway, its a slow process getting to where I need to be. I might do Tony Robbins course next year in Boca Raton. We'll see.
Lol this is an old thread. Try to be like the guys the women swoon over. Try lifting weights and not talking so much. Boom you are now the strong silent type
Interesting discussion. I could be considered the strong silent type EXCEPT I lack confidence. I'm pretty quiet and women have complained I'm a terrible communicator. I'm aware of it and am trying to improve. I want to be a good partner if I ever find a good woman again. I'll never be a charismatic sweet talker, but hopefully being more secure in my own skin will eventually attract someone. Of course, I have to relocate for that to happen.
Precisely. I've learned that location makes the difference,especially those who feel out of place where they are...
Lol this is an old thread. Try to be like the guys the women swoon over. Try lifting weights and not talking so much. Boom you are now the strong silent type
After you snag your women, you can open up some.
So basically be a malleable conformist rather than who you really are...
Thanks for saying that. I've been aware of these issues for a long time, and started working on them a lot after my divorce 7 years ago. I've done workshops, read books, therapy, etc. People tell me all the time they don't understand why I'm not extremely confident. I don't understand it either. I just beat myself up so much over past mistakes. My silence and shyness are mistaken for arrogance. I hate that. Anyway, its a slow process getting to where I need to be. I might do Tony Robbins course next year in Boca Raton. We'll see.
You cannot be who you are not. Best you can do is try to accentuate the positives of it.
So I'd much rather have a guy that my family thinks is a girly-boy than the pigs I've gone out with in the past that my family thought were "good catches".
ROTFLMFAO!!!!!!!
PIGS!!
men are pigs (grunt grunt grunt) TOO BAD WE OWN EVERYTHING!!!!
Thanks for saying that. I've been aware of these issues for a long time, and started working on them a lot after my divorce 7 years ago. I've done workshops, read books, therapy, etc. People tell me all the time they don't understand why I'm not extremely confident. I don't understand it either. I just beat myself up so much over past mistakes. My silence and shyness are mistaken for arrogance. I hate that. Anyway, its a slow process getting to where I need to be. I might do Tony Robbins course next year in Boca Raton. We'll see.
Read a book called "A New Earth" by Eckhart Tolle. It talks about being in the present moment and it really focuses on getting out of one's head. Things like accepting things and understanding that we carry around a lot of baggage and it focuses on just accepting the baggage and working on not lamenting about the fact that we have baggage. A letting go of sorts.
I struggle with being in the "now" as do a lot of people, it's usually the future or the past that garners too much attention from our thoughts.
Start paying more attention to your mind and you'll see that you're probably fixated too much on the past. Practice on clearing your mind of thoughts. Tremendously difficult at a times, but it would be a worthy pursuit.
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