I'm Unsure If I Could Be Intimate With a Woman... (dating, married)
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Yargh, Soviet, my childhood would have been your worst nightmare. My father had me cleaning his kennels from the age of 12, and I grew up running around with his dogs, in and out of the kennels, from the time I could walk. The vast amount of fecal matter that I have come into contact with is rather epic - I've stepped in it, been splattered by it, FALLEN INTO IT, etc. Once I even willingly crawled through it to get to a pup that had fallen under a whelping pen.
Consider this though: I have a great immune system, and I never had any illness related to my kennel work. Yeah, sure, you might one day run into a germ that will kill you, but most of them just make you stronger. Oh, and sex is messy - that's the fun part, or one of 'em anyway.
See a therapist - your OCD is holding you back from what should be a freeing experience, not a source of anxiety.
It's certainly possible that the OP has it, but suggesting that the OP get therapy based on one behavior that may or may not be related to a disorder that affects one percent of adults, is a real stretch.
No, suggesting therapy is probably the best possible thing, if the OP wants to eventually have a relationship.
This is keeping him from having romantic relationships; I'd say that's a significant interference in one's life (again, provided this bothers the OP; if it doesn't, then no problem, he can just never have a physical relationship).
Other options, such as wiping down dates with Handi Wipes, really aren't as feasible as either:
1. the OP discussing all this with someone qualified to make a diagnosis or rule out a diagnosis, or
2. just not having a relationship, period, end of story, that involves sex.
well it's okay op. some people are disgusted and do not want contacts with other people's bodily fluid. i don't see why that's a problem.
He's not saying anything about bodily fluid. He's referring to germs and contaminants. He's not saying the girl's butt is still wet from backsplash. Being a germaphobe can cause problems in relationships, or cause lack of relationships and not just in a romantic sense. Howie Mandel is a big germaphobe. If you've ever watched Deal or No Deal, he won't touch anyone's hands. He bumps fists. I don't remember if it was his birthday or anniversary, but his wife bought him one of those automatic toilet seat covers for their own house.
And, as we've seen in Findly's thread, it takes a certain kind of person to a.) deal with OCD in general, and b.) be okay with someone who makes them take a Silkwood shower before and after every bowel movement or sexual encounter. Not everyone is going to appreciate being treated as contaminated.
I really struggle with the assertion that 1%, is "most people". Most people (99% of adults), do not have it "varying in severity". Either they have it (1%), or they don't have it (99%). It is diagnosed based on several general, and specific criteria that must be met, and if not met, the person does not have the disorder.
It's certainly possible that the OP has it, but suggesting that the OP get therapy based on one behavior that may or may not be related to a disorder that affects one percent of adults, is a real stretch. Everyone has their weird "thing", and most people know they have that thing. Absent all the other criteria, having a "thing", or even many things, does not make OCD.
He can limp along living a less than stellar lonely existence without human contact if he wants to, but I vote he gets the help he needs from a professional to live his life to the fullest
He's not saying anything about bodily fluid. He's referring to germs and contaminants. He's not saying the girl's butt is still wet from backsplash. Being a germaphobe can cause problems in relationships, or cause lack of relationships and not just in a romantic sense. Howie Mandel is a big germaphobe. If you've ever watched Deal or No Deal, he won't touch anyone's hands. He bumps fists. I don't remember if it was his birthday or anniversary, but his wife bought him one of those automatic toilet seat covers for their own house.
LOL @ howie mendel and the toilet seat, that's messed up! I have OCD so I do know about it, ty....he posted topic stating 'don't think I'll be able to be intimate...' and I'm saying, maybe he won't be able to and it's not that big of a deal if so. People want a lot of things in life, doesn't mean you can always have them, shame as it may be. *shrugs*
No, suggesting therapy is probably the best possible thing, if the OP wants to eventually have a relationship.
This is keeping him from having romantic relationships; I'd say that's a significant interference in one's life (again, provided this bothers the OP; if it doesn't, then no problem, he can just never have a physical relationship).
Other options, such as wiping down dates with Handi Wipes, really aren't as feasible as either:
1. the OP discussing all this with someone qualified to make a diagnosis or rule out a diagnosis, or
2. just not having a relationship, period, end of story, that involves sex.
It's not keeping me from having a romantic relationship! She just has to take a shower before getting dirrrrrty with me in bed!
It's not keeping me from having a romantic relationship! She just has to take a shower before getting dirrrrrty with me in bed!
So if there's no problem, why are you asking what to do about it? Also if it's no hindrance to having a relationship, why is the title of your thread "I'm unsure if I could be intimate with a woman"?
How Insulting to women. Gheezh OCD or not. Just insulting.
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