Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I'm not the only one here wondering that, obviously. We simply want you to be honest with yourself, assert yourself, and get yourself out of that mess. When you post to a public forum, you get opinions, and you may not like them all. Sorry not sorry!
But with TWO of you now trying to shut me down (did you married guys bond over PMs or something?), I'll just again say "good luck." What more is there to say?
If she ever really read my posts she would realize I am not male. However, on the flip side, it's unintentional. But, I am sometimes taken seriously (as a male / as Wile E. Coyote) and I get to speak on a much broader range of subjects. Like, they let me comment in the automotive section -- LOL...
Thank you, you gave me a complex lol. It looks like a mess because items are bunched outside because the inside had to be emptied out. In a few weeks it will be much more polished
Quote:
Originally Posted by matisse12
The house in the two pics you posted today looks a lot better and nice.
Looks like you had it built on an incline, yes? that seems tricky
If she ever really read my posts she would realize I am not male. However, on the flip side, it's unintentional. But, I am sometimes taken seriously (as a male / as Wile E. Coyote) and I get to speak on a much broader range of subjects. Like, they let me comment in the automotive section -- LOL...
I did the same thing. I chose a username that sounded masculine so I could talk to conservative Christians. When I confessed that a few women knew exactly what I was talking about.
I did the same thing. I chose a username that sounded masculine so I could talk to conservative Christians. When I confessed that a few women knew exactly what I was talking about.
I didn't do it on purpose. It's just that all my usernames are Looney Tunes
Honestly there have been some very lets say interesting twists in this road that I wont bore you with but let me say this project has been a real challenge for both. These "twists" along with us working on this daily (well me anyway lol) she feels why would we give up the house we built ourselves so someone else can enjoy it, while I'm concerned about living for my house payment and not enjoying the rest of my active years.
Either way, venting online to a bunch of folks I dont know has honestly been quite therapeutic, sincerely thanks for listening and giving advice/comments/jokes.
lpranger467,
It is amusing to see this thread about your real estate dilemma has crept into multiple topics: personal finance, investing, moving issues, retirement, psychology and even relationships ;-)
It seems that your dilemma does contain all these elements. Only you know the effects of these contributions to your dilemma. Other posters' assertions are just pure assumptions or their POVs (based on their own life experience).
I have enjoyed seeing the pictures of your soon to be new home. It is wonderful that you and your wife have taken on this 'adventure' and worked together in this project. The pictures reminded me of the work we did in our first home: created a new living level in the basement, built 2 brick fireplaces/chimney (with no previous masonry experience ;-). I truly believe that the couple who toil together, stay together through thick or thin.
Below are my takes about your dilemma and what I would do if I was in your situation.
Regarding real estate, I think owning a house on a lake is a great investment both in personal happiness and finance. A quick check of Torch Lake views and real estate prices confirmed my assessment. It's too bad that you currently feel quite stressed (social isolation, financial cost etc.) and want to sell the place. It is likely that you will feel less stressed when you move in the house and have found new social outlets (it's hard to do in the winter but there are many online options).
Regarding financial situation, I think that you do stretch a bit thin. However, it does not seem that you are in a precarious condition. It I was you, I would try to pay down the credit card debts instead of putting every pennies in the house project. You may have to scale down the furnishings quality (this does not matter if you plan to sell the house eventually!). It may take a bit longer to finish the house but you don't have to sell the house as soon as your 2-year residence time has met as long as you can meet the mortgage payments.
IMO, you should enjoy living in the finished house for a while. I also think that it is better to sell the house in a nice, finished condition (with landscaping etc.) instead of rush selling it as an unfinished project. The current downturn in real estate market is only temporary. There are always buyers with deep pockets looking for a retirement waterfront home . Near my house is a new-built huge riverfront home (6,400 sq. ft., 6 BRs, 6Baths, 3-car garage, 2.1A, 250 ft river frontage) listing for 2.99M. I would not be surprised if it will be sold to a cash buyer at or near the listing price. Friends of us decided just last August to sell their lakeview home (bought 4 years ago for 500K, listed for 1.2M) and the house was sold within few weeks!
There have been quite a few posts speculating about your marital relationships. IMO, you have a great marital/partnership with your wife. Just like in any marriage, there are always some disagreements or different opinions about financial decisions. Everything can be resolved as long as the couple are willing to discuss issues, tradeoffs etc., and to COMPROMISE!
Bottom like, I think that your dilemma is more of a psychological issue. Anybody would feel stressed living for over a year in a travel trailer while working full time and on a house with limited social interaction activities. I am certain that things will improved vastly when you move in the house. Spring is just around the corner ;-) . There will be many things to see and do in Torch Lake. Hang in there, things will be better.
In the meantime, I strongly suggest that you should take it easy. You should do some traveling with your wife. A drive to Traverse City, Grand Rapids, Detroit or Chicago to participate in some holiday activities is a great stress reliever!
Thank you so much for the kind words and advice, I do think the delays in the project (that caused us to be in the trailer longer) have spiked my stress level as that its nearly impossible to keep the trailer at a comfortable temperature. I did get an additional bank loan to which I will pay off one high interest credit card and will use the rest t have siding done and the bathrooms tiled, though I can do both myself I think when youre building its best to get experts in for the fine detail work.
As you have seen the lake is awesome, it truly is crystal clear and Caribbean blue which is why even seasonal cottages demand top dollar.
I think I'm leaning towards doing what you said, finish it and live here a bit and see what happens. Though I wont have as much money per month as I'd like, I wont be living in squalor either. Along with this I think that when I dont literally have to work around house everyday I'll have a better outlook on things. Have a great day
Quote:
Originally Posted by BellaDL
lpranger467,
It is amusing to see this thread about your real estate dilemma has crept into multiple topics: personal finance, investing, moving issues, retirement, psychology and even relationships ;-)
It seems that your dilemma does contain all these elements. Only you know the effects of these contributions to your dilemma. Other posters' assertions are just pure assumptions or their POVs (based on their own life experience).
I have enjoyed seeing the pictures of your soon to be new home. It is wonderful that you and your wife have taken on this 'adventure' and worked together in this project. The pictures reminded me of the work we did in our first home: created a new living level in the basement, built 2 brick fireplaces/chimney (with no previous masonry experience ;-). I truly believe that the couple who toil together, stay together through thick or thin.
Below are my takes about your dilemma and what I would do if I was in your situation.
Regarding real estate, I think owning a house on a lake is a great investment both in personal happiness and finance. A quick check of Torch Lake views and real estate prices confirmed my assessment. It's too bad that you currently feel quite stressed (social isolation, financial cost etc.) and want to sell the place. It is likely that you will feel less stressed when you move in the house and have found new social outlets (it's hard to do in the winter but there are many online options).
Regarding financial situation, I think that you do stretch a bit thin. However, it does not seem that you are in a precarious condition. It I was you, I would try to pay down the credit card debts instead of putting every pennies in the house project. You may have to scale down the furnishings quality (this does not matter if you plan to sell the house eventually!). It may take a bit longer to finish the house but you don't have to sell the house as soon as your 2-year residence time has met as long as you can meet the mortgage payments.
IMO, you should enjoy living in the finished house for a while. I also think that it is better to sell the house in a nice, finished condition (with landscaping etc.) instead of rush selling it as an unfinished project. The current downturn in real estate market is only temporary. There are always buyers with deep pockets looking for a retirement waterfront home . Near my house is a new-built huge riverfront home (6,400 sq. ft., 6 BRs, 6Baths, 3-car garage, 2.1A, 250 ft river frontage) listing for 2.99M. I would not be surprised if it will be sold to a cash buyer at or near the listing price. Friends of us decided just last August to sell their lakeview home (bought 4 years ago for 500K, listed for 1.2M) and the house was sold within few weeks!
There have been quite a few posts speculating about your marital relationships. IMO, you have a great marital/partnership with your wife. Just like in any marriage, there are always some disagreements or different opinions about financial decisions. Everything can be resolved as long as the couple are willing to discuss issues, tradeoffs etc., and to COMPROMISE!
Bottom like, I think that your dilemma is more of a psychological issue. Anybody would feel stressed living for over a year in a travel trailer while working full time and on a house with limited social interaction activities. I am certain that things will improved vastly when you move in the house. Spring is just around the corner ;-) . There will be many things to see and do in Torch Lake. Hang in there, things will be better.
In the meantime, I strongly suggest that you should take it easy. You should do some traveling with your wife. A drive to Traverse City, Grand Rapids, Detroit or Chicago to participate in some holiday activities is a great stress reliever!
Relax. You'll do fine. Once you're able to move in, that should help to relieve your stress. Enjoy your home for a while and decide what to do later. Have a good Thanksgiving. Enjoy the Michigan tradition of watching the Lions lose--just don't bet on the game. If it's a close game, that could add to your stress.
no desire to live on Lake Michigan, OP? (before deciding on Torch Lake which is not far from Lake Michigan)
I grew up in a town right on Lake Michigan - for 18 years growing up, then left for university and never lived there again.
Michigan City, Indiana right on the southern tip of Lake Michigan, 60 miles from Chicago.
Living on Lake Michigan was really nice....the lovely sandy beaches, swimming and good-sized waves, and pretty ever-changing lake with nature and weather, sand dunes........
You haven't said what you'd like to do on Torch Lake.....boating? does it have fishing or swimming? does it have ice skating in winter? are there trails right beside the lake? or mostly looking at it?
(no one answered my question about paying $650,000 for a lot.....)
Last edited by matisse12; 11-22-2022 at 04:45 PM..
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
