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He is 28 years old, but emotionally he is about 10. He lives with his parents, enjoys seeing movies and playing games rated for younger kids, and when he gets mad at anybody, he storms off into another room and shuts the door. I've seen him absolutely flip out when one of his other friends didn't want to go on a ride with him at a water park and tell him to go home. Our friend circle has said that he's basically like a child, but he's still a good guy most of the time. I don't think he has any disorder or anything, he's just very immature, but I turn the other cheek because I don't want to lose him as a friend. So perhaps with a person like him, I should be more understanding, but it's hard to say. His parents have even grounded him recently for an unrelated thing.
I wonder what disagreeable things he could say about you in turn, because right now, he's not the one acting like a 10 year old... that's you stomping your feet because you aren't getting your own way.
There may be reasons that he does not want to drive you that he does not want to share with you. Are you certain that he has automobile insurance? He may not, or his car may not even be registered, due to missing a smog check or something. Maybe he has had an automobile accident in the past (or fears one) and does not want to be responsible for someone else.
Maybe, as others have mentioned, he simply does not want to stay out as late as you do.
In any case, I don't think you should be so put out that he has declined to be your chauffeur for the evening.
It does not mean he is selfish.
He has driven me in the past for non-drinking events, almost every time we go to the movies, bowling, etc, so it isn't about insurance or registration. Its just his shortness of temper about it that bothered me the most, without any explanation.
I'm sure it was surprising. He must have had something happen in the past to make him feel that way. I guess you can be thankful he was direct with you instead of agreeing to do it but acting quiet the whole night.
Yes, that is true. And thank you for seeing what I'm saying and not making me out to be the bad guy like many of these other posters.
You might be surprised at how annoying people who are drinking can appear to non-drinkers. Since your friend doesn't drink, he's probably wanting to keep his options open so he can leave the bar early (and keep in mind, he may not enjoy going to bars at all, and has agreed to do so on this occasion only because it's your birthday) if he feels that the drinking has exceeded his comfort level. He might have felt differently if you had held your get-together in a restaurant, where the main purpose is eating, and drinking is a sideline thing; instead of at a bar where drinking is the primary purpose and eating is secondary. But regardless, he has given you his answer, and that's that.
IDK, OP. I don't think it's appropriate to try to pressure him, through another of the guests. No means no. The neighbor has his reasons. Hopefully, an Uber would be safe? Or you being the b-day girl, maybe another one of your friends would drive you home.
You might be surprised at how annoying people who are drinking can appear to non-drinkers. Since your friend doesn't drink, he's probably wanting to keep his options open so he can leave the bar early (and keep in mind, he may not enjoy going to bars at all, and has agreed to do so on this occasion only because it's your birthday) if he feels that the drinking has exceeded his comfort level. He might have felt differently if you had held your get-together in a restaurant, where the main purpose is eating, and drinking is a sideline thing; instead of at a bar where drinking is the primary purpose and eating is secondary. But regardless, he has given you his answer, and that's that.
This place is both a restaurant and a bar. We were planning on sitting at the bar and having a few drinks and then eating dinner at a table. He has been to the establishment several times to eat with his family. But no, I'm not going to push it anymore.
Sorry, I'm with your friend. Don't assume that the non-drinker wants to be your chauffeur. If you've ever had someone puke in your car, you would understand.
I don't care how "responsible" my friends claim they're planning to be. I don't want drinkers in my car anymore.
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