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Men who can't work, cannot find work, are not trained to work, not brought up to work are not likely to make good husbands and fathers. The black community suffers from lack of whole families. But guess what, if the black folks are not marrying, then the 50% divorce rate must be mostly white which also devastates families and hurts children. We are in a culture of the bizarre as opposed to the tradition of whole families. I do not expect this to get better and I fully expect our culture and society to utterly collapse.
My dad worked. My mom worked. My brother worked. I worked. The real problems are those things no one wants to talk about because certain issues are just too difficult to address or either no clear way to solve.
I like how non-Black people think they are experts about the Black community. Man, their lives must be so boring. It's never boring to be Black (I'm not fully Black but whatever). I guess that's why I don't care about white, hispanic etc...
My dad worked. My mom worked. My brother worked. I worked. The real problems are those things no one wants to talk about because certain issues are just too difficult to address or either no clear way to solve.
What are those things?
I know thhis may not be Pc,but I really believe integration drove black men away from black women.
Code word for interacial marriage. Yes,it is being pushed by liberals,a little bit too much.
Diversity. Remember when middle class,upper class,and lower class blacks all lived together?
Once integration happened,they left. Why? Because lots of black believe whites are superior. It has been ingrained since slavery. Why live around other blacks when you can move into "high society"?
The article states that 73% percent of births are to single mothers, not 80%. It is interesting to note that African immigrants almost always marry & have children within wedlock. Every time you turn around Africans - Nigerians, Ethiopians, Ghanaians, Sudanese - are having a wedding. In fact, the out-of-wedlock birth rate for Africans & other African descended immigrants is 39%. Interestingly, for Hispanic immigrants, the out of wedlock birth rate is 42%
African descendants in general have a different experience in terms of marriage and family structures than may of their African counterparts. Their marital traditions have been broken down over the generations and not enough has been done to build them up again. Compare the out-of wedlock statistic in question with that of Nigeria which is only 6%. Even among African descended populations in the Americas, the out of wedlock birth rates can be extremely high, but common law situations are more common & accepted. Thus children may still grow up with their father or a male figure in their family close by. In the U.S., "Black" American families tend to be more spread out, so growing up without a father or male figure is probably more common.
Not sure why some intend on comparing "Black" Americans & Hispanics because when one looks at Hispanic nations on a whole, there are varying out-of-wedlock birth rates. 73% in El Salvador, 63% in the Dominican Republic, 74% in Colombia and 65% in Puerto Rico.
It's just sad overall. I do hope the families across the U.S. and across the Americas do better in the coming years. Children are suffering...
What are those things?
I know thhis may not be Pc,but I really believe integration drove black men away from black women.
Code word for interacial marriage. Yes,it is being pushed by liberals,a little bit too much.
Diversity. Remember when middle class,upper class,and lower class blacks all lived together?
Once integration happened,they left. Why? Because lots of black believe whites are superior. It has been ingrained since slavery. Why live around other blacks when you can move into "high society"?
Well, I don't know if you can blame it on one thing. My dad was quite the womanizer but it was other black women he went for, not white women. Integration is no big deal to me--it just proves how messed up relations between whites and blacks were to begin with. I mean seriously, blacks are so horrible that we can't use the same bathrooms or sit down at the same restaurants as everyone else? Seriously?
The real problems I'm speaking of are the misnomer in the black community of psych issues, violence, and lack of respect for each other. Let's face it, whites and everyone else have always been more open to seeking, and giving help. Black folks usually sweep stuff under the rug and don't even mention what we say about each other when one of us doesn't appear to measure up.
The black community does value marriage, I came from a two parent home and all of my uncles and aunts are married for the most part. My brother is married, I am married as well. I think the black community has some issues, particularly black males have issues with high unemployment, high prison rates, lack of education that doesn't make many of them really marriage ready.
However marriage has been devalued by all of U.S. society. Marriage rates are going down for everyone. And actually recent number show there are more black people getting married. I also think we need to stress quality over quantity. A lot of people at my job who are white are on their second marriage or divorced. I think traditional society pushes marriage, but a lot of people don't know how to hold a marriage together, hence the high divorce rate.
I think too because women have been come so independent in the U.S the overall marriage rate is going down. If you look in Carribbean and African countries as well as Asian and Middle Eastern countries, the marriage rate is very high because women are more dependent on men there and a woman's value is tied to being married in many ways.
The black community does value marriage, I came from a two parent home and all of my uncles and aunts are married for the most part. My brother is married, I am married as well. I think the black community has some issues, particularly black males have issues with high unemployment, high prison rates, lack of education that doesn't make many of them really marriage ready.
However marriage has been devalued by all of U.S. society. Marriage rates are going down for everyone. And actually recent number show there are more black people getting married. I also think we need to stress quality over quantity. A lot of people at my job who are white are on their second marriage or divorced. I think traditional society pushes marriage, but a lot of people don't know how to hold a marriage together, hence the high divorce rate.
I think too because women have been come so independent in the U.S the overall marriage rate is going down. If you look in Carribbean and African countries as well as Asian and Middle Eastern countries, the marriage rate is very high because women are more dependent on men there and a woman's value is tied to being married in many ways.
Sounds like we are talking about two very different segments of the black community here. You came from a married household and so did I, but let's be truthful here, there is a large percentage of blacks that do not value marriage at all.
There is no question in my mind that a man and woman should be married in order to have a family but in reality it's often not even possible to maintain a marriage. There are too many factors out there keeping the success rate down--mainly socioeconomic, stemming from all sorts of other issues.
What are those things?
Code word for interacial marriage. Yes,it is being pushed by liberals,a little bit too much.
Respectfully, i'd like to address two things.
Interracial marriage accounts for very little in the black community. The majority of whites who marry interracially marry asians. There is still very real life prejudice against black/white/mixed relations. We're looking at 2%-6% interracial rate(depending on who you ask). All of the sistas out there who in their heart of hearts believes that white women are taking away all the black mens (especially the "good" ones) are misinformed unfortunately.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jerseygal4u
Why live around other blacks when you can move into "high society"?
Personally, I don't see how marriage does much to improve the relationship. I am black (perhaps not "not black enough" for some but that's not important). Between black women and black men, marriage is a no-win situation. For the most part it comes down to us not really being able to live which each other for very long. I wouldn't say that we are loner types but most of us want and need our own space to stay sane. Marriage is out because it's about compromise and all that which is something most of us just aren't willing to take on.
Let me just say this, I came from a two-parent household and will always believe I would have done better in life if my folks had never lived together.
Too bad about your folks, but I also come from a two-parent household, and know that many of the good things that I have experienced in life is precisely because of being raised by married parents who modeled what a healthy family looks like. Marriage is actually a win-win situation for those who want to be married.
The article states that 73% percent of births are to single mothers, not 80%. It is interesting to note that African immigrants almost always marry & have children within wedlock. Every time you turn around Africans - Nigerians, Ethiopians, Ghanaians, Sudanese - are having a wedding. In fact, the out-of-wedlock birth rate for Africans & other African descended immigrants is 39%. Interestingly, for Hispanic immigrants, the out of wedlock birth rate is 42%
African descendants in general have a different experience in terms of marriage and family structures than may of their African counterparts. Their marital traditions have been broken down over the generations and not enough has been done to build them up again. Compare the out-of wedlock statistic in question with that of Nigeria which is only 6%. Even among African descended populations in the Americas, the out of wedlock birth rates can be extremely high, but common law situations are more common & accepted. Thus children may still grow up with their father or a male figure in their family close by. In the U.S., "Black" American families tend to be more spread out, so growing up without a father or male figure is probably more common.
Not sure why some intend on comparing "Black" Americans & Hispanics because when one looks at Hispanic nations on a whole, there are varying out-of-wedlock birth rates. 73% in El Salvador, 63% in the Dominican Republic, 74% in Colombia and 65% in Puerto Rico.
It's just sad overall. I do hope the families across the U.S. and across the Americas do better in the coming years. Children are suffering...
This is true about Africans. Marriage is highly valued and a priority. African men and women have no problem getting married.
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