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Its no different of a suggestion as joining a coed sports league, or taking a class in something artsy.
It's quite different. There's no reason for organic human interaction while I'm at a shopping mall. People in sports leagues will naturally strike up conversation with another, unless it's the Robot Softball League, where it's all batting and no chit-chat. People attempting to friend me up while I'm trying on shoes is.... creepy.
It's quite different. There's no reason for organic human interaction while I'm at a shopping mall. People in sports leagues will naturally strike up conversation with another, unless it's the Robot Softball League, where it's all batting and no chit-chat. People attempting to friend me up while I'm trying on shoes is.... creepy.
It's quite different. There's no reason for organic human interaction while I'm at a shopping mall. People in sports leagues will naturally strike up conversation with another, unless it's the Robot Softball League, where it's all batting and no chit-chat. People attempting to friend me up while I'm trying on shoes is.... creepy.
But honestly if you are really rusty in that sport, being surrounded by other guys who are a lot better, it would just hurt your self esteem.
I myself have been in volleyball and softball leagues and I was a newbie, rookie learning. I didn't feel like I was the cream of the crop.
At the mall I was thinking more of in terms of interaction between customers and stores employees. Who knows, one could get into a dating relationship with their barber. If the woman who cut my hair was in her 30s and available I would consider that a good place. And there are barbers, maybe not so much in enclosed malls, but in outdoor malls, yes.
I strongly agree with this. On the average, I've gotten noticeably more interest from women from outside Chicagoland than from women native to the area.
That said, you can sometimes find women who don't subscribe to the mindset even though they're natives.
It's useful to understand the mentality which is widespread - although not universal - in Chicago. The mentality is highly conformist, not only in terms of race and culture but also in terms of how you think, act and live. Also, people who subscribe to this mentality tend to do everything in tight-knit groups. It's very difficult to break into these groups because they often date back many years.
This groupthink also means that even if an individual person likes you, they may avoid you out of concern with what their friends would think. If an individual woman likes you but you think her group probably won't, it's best to keep her group out of the picture. For example, you may be able to approach a woman when she's not with her friends.
I agree with everyone who said Lincoln Park and Lakeview aren't your best bet. Lincoln Park and Lakeview are the areas where this mentality is most widespread. I lived in Lakeview for over three years. Even as a Caucasian, I didn't fit in socially. I learned to spend time in other neighborhoods.
However, while other gentrified neighborhoods in Chicago are a marked improvement, this is relative. Even there, this mentality is still widespread.
Within the city limits, the best areas are the Far North Side and Hyde Park. (The Far North Side includes Uptown, Edgewater and Rogers Park.) These areas are very diverse and relatively integrated, so they tend to attract people who are open to other races and cultures. For whatever reason, these areas are also more likely to attract people who actually do their own thing rather than engaging in groupthink. The people you meet here, whether natives or transplants, are likely to be open-minded.
I also agree with everyone who said the suburbs were a good bet.
For finding transplants, Hyde Park and Evanston are especially promising. People move to both areas from all over the world to attend the universities there. This is on top of the fact that these areas are some of the most integrated and diverse in Chicagoland to begin with. I've spent quite a bit of time in Hyde Park and have found it to be far more welcoming than the typical North Side neighborhood.
Another idea is to try to figure out where expatriates living in Chicago socialize. For example, there are cultural organizations relating to specific countries and/or their languages.
The walks of life you seek out will also make a difference. I've found that downtown white-collar professionals tend to share the mentality described above. And the issues with blue-collar people and interracial dating have already been noted. Another possibility, if this is your scene, would be to try to date creative types. They tend to be more open-minded in general, especially toward other races and cultures.
Also, it's very useful to have a car to get to the areas where you're likely to find what you're looking for. These areas tend to have easy parking, but they're also far enough from downtown that getting there by public transportation takes a long time. If it's infeasible to own a car, there are carsharing services in Chicago that let you rent cars by the hour. Of course, you could also rent by the day from a traditional car rental agency.
I've found hipsters to be mostly accepting...of other hipsters. Unless someone wants to actually adopt the hipster culture themselves, it's probably not feasible to try to date hipster women. Most likely, hipsters wouldn't accept someone who has a white-collar corporate job anyway.
What time frame? I remember back when Lakeview was actually eclectic and diverse...in the 1990s. Unfortunately, this is no longer the case. Also, the transplants who dominate these neighborhoods today are very different people than the natives who actually hail from these areas. The natives who grew up in these areas are usually fine - it's just that they tend not to still live there.
I agree with this, having met many Caucasians and non-Caucasians from the northwest suburbs. Having spent most of my childhood in DuPage County, I'd extend it to this area as well. Also, non-Caucasians in the suburbs tend to be approachable, open-minded and level-headed.
It should also be noted that Zero Gravity is only for college-age people and people in their late teens. They have an upper age limit which is enforced; someone I know was actually refused admission for this reason.
This is a side point but still is highly important. Some people may in fact get offended if you decide it's time to move on. If you're thinking about moving, it may be better to be careful about who you discuss it with.
Best post on the Chicago forum in a long time. This can be a great handout in intro to Chicagoland for those who are relocating.
I think there is a reason for this, but its NOT because European culture is necessarily all-together more progressive than America.
Its because as you say, it comes down to what seems exotic.
Americans are fascinated with Europe and Europe is fascinated with America.
And when America (European see this as they can see the forest for the trees) is perceived as a land of creativity, new art forms, etc. to them black-American is a fundamental part of that, and one in which they have no counterpart in Europe.
White American culture is for obvious reasons derived from European culture, but black American culture, is what to them gives America its flavor. Thats why you had British rock/pop stars for the last 50 years emulate the Blues (Eric Clapton/Rolling Stones, Led Zeppelin) to todays female pop soul emulating soul/motown, etc. (Duffy, Adele, Amy Winehouse, Joss Stone, etc.)
Basically in Europe, it is native Africans which are less respected. To Europeans, it is the native Africans which overthrew the Europeans in their country setting them packing back in the 50s and 60s. And to them, the fact that they come to the European countries to take advantage of their economy, their state support system (In France anyone that comes from a former French colony can be a citizen) they see them as a burden, the way white Americans see balck americans. However white Americans are more likely to be receptive of immigrants as a whole than Europe in many ways, because to Americans people coming for a better life to achieve the American dream is proof to them of Americas greatness. Plus Americans (very true in Chicago) love to experience exotic cultures through sampling cuisine ethnic restaurants and festivals.
So in conclusion, Europeans see black American culture as what makes America fascinating, exotic. Whereas they see Africans themselves they same way the many white Americans see black Americans. Europeans feel that African immgirants are burden on the system, whereas Americans see Nigerians/Ethiopeans, as fascinating immigrants coming here to acheive the American dream and start ethnic restaurants where they can experience their culture.
I think that is where the differences lie.
Why does their always have to be an explanation or a reason as to why white women would be attracted to black men....LMAO!! Get out of here with that crap!! Are you afraid that the unicorn myth may be true-they may actually want guys with bigger penises, who are physically more dominant, with great rhythm, like guys with street-like swagger, and other African American stereotypes that are considered classless and negative in America! Are you afraid that the people who have been considered rejects in America may actually be respected and loved in another county......noooo not possible!!!Or are you REALLY afraid that they may love an African American for his mind, intellect, logic, heart, right along with his sexual prowess......now that definitely couldnt be it. LMAO!! Why do you feel the need to make a disclaimer! And attempt to knock German women subtly for their tastes. Why do Americans feel they are so enlightened? The older I get the more I realize Americans are bred narcissist morons who are simply out of touch with the rest of the world. African Americans are screwed up mentally, and Caucasian Americans are just as screwed!!I have little respect for either culture and I am a product of both. This guy, lol.
Why does their always have to be an explanation or a reason as to why white women would be attracted to black men....LMAO!! Get out of here with that crap!! Are you afraid that the unicorn myth may be true-they may actually want guys with bigger penises, who are physically more dominant, with great rhythm, like guys with street-like swagger, and other African American stereotypes that are considered classless and negative in America! Are you afraid that the people who have been considered rejects in America may actually be respected and loved in another county......noooo not possible!!!Or are you REALLY afraid that they may love an African American for his mind, intellect, logic, heart, right along with his sexual prowess......now that definitely couldnt be it. LMAO!! Why do you feel the need to make a disclaimer! And attempt to knock German women subtly for their tastes. Why do Americans feel they are so enlightened? The older I get the more I realize Americans are bred narcissist morons who are simply out of touch with the rest of the world. African Americans are screwed up mentally, and Caucasian Americans are just as screwed!!I have little respect for either culture and I am a product of both. This guy, lol.
dude the guy just explained why blk men from america are loved in europebut why african immigrants are not so much. it makes since,because in France they are passing harsh new immigration laws.
e found hipsters to be mostly accepting...of other hipsters. Unless someone wants to actually adopt the hipster culture themselves, it's probably not feasible to try to date hipster women. Most likely, hipsters wouldn't accept someone who has a white-collar corporate job anyway
I agree kind of,I think hipsters are accepting of urban blk and latino males as long as they
are non-threatening,more so then a professional white guy,because I think hipsters
are in search of authentic culture,because well we dont celeberate white culture in America
atleast not overtly.
so if you are blk guy who speaks slang but you are non-threating,I think hipsters
would gravitate towards you.
you are right about group think and lack of individuality in LP and Lakeview.
but I still find Lakeview tolerable. LP is impossible.
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