Minnesota ICE - distant passive aggressiveness? (Minneapolis, St. Paul: apartment, crime, loan)

[jennifat]

Originally Posted by FJhg

You're actually a good example of a Minnesotan who refuses to back down and be modest about Minnesota... It is what it is. It has potential, maybe one day it WILL become on of THOSE cities, but it's not yet. When the next Amazon develops in Minneapolis and it becomes an international airport busting at the seems let me know. Right now the extent of foreign flights are the something along the lines of seasonal Cancun, Jamaica, and maybe some year round UK, Iceland flights, and seasonal Paris/Germany, which is your typical small barely international airport profile, it's not an international city or destination. When will there be a year round China flight? NOT TO SAY IT ISNT NICE AND HECK MAYBE I WILL MOVE BACK ONE DAY, maybe because all my family is there?. I'm just talking averages here and what the economy and people and COMPANIES want and desire as a place to LIVE AND WORK. You have to factor in the whole picture. People are willing to deal with a little grunge or litter here and there (maybe even like it) if it's where the action is ( and these type of things are actually unimportant, states like Washington with 'lots' of litter are actually the top states for renewable energy, far exceeding Minnesota, but bask in your low litter side of highways, albeit meaningless beyond aesthetics.

Yikes. If that isn't the pot calling the kettle black...

You do you, dude. Keep grinding that axe.

[Thoreau424]

Originally Posted by LeTraveler

I'm a blunt East Coaster so I appreciate them as well. Let me be blunt here.

The topic of Seattle/WA vs. Minnesota is right up my alley as these were my top two choices when deciding where to move.

Anyone who has run into this passive-aggressiveness - and is not used to it - appreciates it brought out into the open for discussion. I've seen a lot of that in Colorado, but never encountered it before in my previous coastal location.

Even trying to draw attention to it brings out odd reactions.

[Lodestar]

It's cultural. It's "our way." Probably has its roots in our heritage.

I've lived in Washington state, Colorado and Nebraska and have traveled the US pretty extensively. There are many cultures I enjoy but I was always glad to get back to my prairie home.

I remember when we lived in Washington saying to DH, "People here stare straight through me like I don't even exist." It was that much more marked than the Minnesota reserve.

Colorado was fine but it wasn't home. And Nebraska was still living by 1950s values when I lived there.

There are worse things than refusing to go to every war you're invited to. We like things low key.

[Glenfield]

The fact that people from the coasts can’t accept that everyone doesn’t think and act like them reflects a provincialism masked as sophistication.

[Lodestar]

Originally Posted by Glenfield

The fact that people from the coasts can’t accept that everyone doesn’t think and act like them reflects a provincialism masked as sophistication.

Never thought about it that way, but you do make a point. I run into a lot of people online who believe that if you don't act rude, boorish or uncivil then you must be hiding the fact that you are really rude, boorish and uncivil.

Someone on the forum the other day called that projection. That's a bit of a gotcha but I truly don't understand people who can't accept that there are actually areas of people who try to be "good folks."

[TwinsFan1975]

Originally Posted by FJhg

Honestly I don't think it boils down to 'they simply dont know any better'... There are tens of thousands, hundreds of thousands of business people flying and spending many days and weeks in the interior. The interior 'fly over' states are not some kind of undiscovered jewel. YES it is nice on many many flanks but the winters keep it from being the next Austin, Charlotte, or Seattle. Be lucky you have United Health Group there or else it would be a dying breed, depending on Best buy and Target, which Amazon is destroying and will probably buy one or both in the next 10 years. If you've got a good setup in the midwest already then you've got the best of both worlds and sitting good, so more power to you; I'm just talking average here of what people and business prefer. All I know is when I was age 13-23 when I lived in MN, by college, in winter, I was constantly asking myself, why am I dealing with this?

The superiority and disdain sprinkled throughout this post confirm your original intent was to troll.

[treemoni]

Originally Posted by Lodestar

Someone on the forum the other day called that projection. That's a bit of a gotcha but I truly don't understand people who can't accept that there are actually areas of people who try to be "good folks."

Don't try to be good. Be good. Otherwise, might as well act as rude and boorish as those coastal people, because that's actually how you feel inside. Hidden aggression is a lot worse than outward aggression, because those people bottle those "undesirable" feelings. Sooner or later all it takes is a minor trigger, now someone else is paying dearly for the mistakes of 1,000 people. Not healthy for either party.

[Lodestar]

Originally Posted by treemoni

Don't try to be good. Be good. Otherwise, might as well act as rude and boorish as those coastal people, because that's actually how you feel inside. Hidden aggression is a lot worse than outward aggression, because those people bottle those "undesirable" feelings. Sooner or later all it takes is a minor trigger, now someone else is paying dearly for the mistakes of 1,000 people. Not healthy for either party.

Oh, that's silly. Compared to some areas of the country Minnesotans are bastions of mental health. As I said passive-aggressive isn't the worst mental inclination.

I say "trying" to be good folks because it would sound absurd to assert that we are all good folks. There are only degrees of goodness.

I think people who try have one up on people who don't bother trying and brag about their poor social skills in the name of honesty. It's a transparent effort to turn a disadvantage into an asset without having to do the work to make it so.

Do you ever recognize goodness anywhere around you at all? I ask because I hear so much negativity from your corner.

You see just what you look for, you poor beleaguered soul, you.

[treemoni]

Originally Posted by lodestar

there are only degrees of goodness.

lol.

[Umbria]

I've lived in MN for over 60 years so I think can speak with some personal experience.

I bought a house in S Mpls and the only neighbor that was ever friendly was an elderly next door neighbor. The other neighbor gave me a brief thank you when I had called the fire department when smoke was coming out of his windows while they were gone - they left a pot on the stove. 9 years there.

I moved to Denver and people all came to welcome me within a short time after I arrived - they were from TX, WA China, NY and various other places.

I moved back to Mpls and I lived here 7 years before any neighbor spoke - only then because she was cornered outside and had no choice.

There is a problem here.