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Cover Your Plate...new wedding trend? I read about this on another forum I follow. An insert in a wedding invitation lets the invitee know that instead of a “gift”....they request that the meal is paid for. The cost is spelled out by age group. Sounds like a fundraiser to me! Uh, no thanks!
I doubt if an informal "cover your plate" is a new wedding trend. I heard about it 60 years ago as a child (when my parents would give more money, or a larger wedding gift, to a couple when both of them, plus their four children attended a wedding dinner, compared to when they did not attend the wedding, and just sent a gift, or just the two of them attended).
But, off course, no one was as crass at to actually indicate how much the meal cost and send an invoice, or actually try to guess the actual cost of the food in advance.
I doubt if an informal "cover your plate" is a new wedding trend. I heard about it 60 years ago as a child (when my parents would give more money, or a larger wedding gift, to a couple when both of them, plus their four children attended a wedding dinner, compared to when they did not attend the wedding, and just sent a gift, or just the two of them attended).
But, off course, no one was as crass at to actually indicate how much the meal cost and send an invoice, or actually try to guess the actual cost of the food in advance.
I agree. I have written before that roughly covering the plate is a reasonable gift amount for employed, middle class wedding guests who attend the ceremony of their close friends and family. But indicating the cost on the card is extremely tacky and I have personally never seen it done. Most wedding invitations I have received were all about sharing a special moment, about love and other sappy sentiments...
Most of the weddings that I attended had assigned seating at the dinner. Did all of these people bring their own card tables and chairs into the reception hall and demand food?
Sorry, but in this case the bride and groom (and if needed, their parents) should have said "I'm sorry, Cousin John, you (and your wife) are invited to the wedding but your three children, two daughters-in-law and grandchildren are not invited". The guests were pretty clueless, but the wedding couple should have been more firm. It would have been wrong even if all of those people had given a large monetary gift. The small wedding gift just made it more wrong.
My cousin “and guest” were invited to our wedding. He brought his 3 kids too! He did RSVP including the kids, btw. Afternoon event..preferred no kids. He gave us a $10.. gift certificate for Walmart. I got a kick out if it, frankly. Sure beat the “gift basket” of expired goodies and hotel wrapped plastic utensils from the coffee bar that I received from my very eccentric friend from from HS. Yea, I was not disappointed on that one either.
The gift was thoughtful and there is no mandate on giving gifts at a wedding.
It's not the fault of the gift giver that the couple spent a fortune on the wedding and somehow felt entitled to recoup the costs they put out through cash or check gifts.
yes but it is tacky if you don't bring one. it's rude.
Tacky... that's a word I use to describe weddings in general.
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