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This only works if the test is done at birth and you keep testing until you find the biological father and force him to support his child. How do you explain to a 7 year old that his dad isn't his dad, he won't be seeing him again and he gets to go hungry? What have you just done to his life? Sorry, but once you're established as the father, the child comes first. If you want to sue the mother later, go right ahead.
Perhaps you guys misunderstood me. My idea would be implemented when a woman was seeking child support. She could only get it from a given man if he indeed was the father. This test would prove this. Simple scenario:
Woman has child with man A, but is in relationship with man B. She breaks up with Man B and decides she needs child support. She wants man B to pay the support, but he does not pass the dna test. So she brings man A and he does pass the test. Then he has to pay. This really isn't a genderwar thing or unfair either. This seems like a logical solution to a problem.
It only works if he wants the child. From the sounds of many posts here, without a biological link to the child, some men would want nothing to do with the child and would resent being responsible in any way.
It only works if he wants the child. From the sounds of many posts here, without a biological link to the child, some men would want nothing to do with the child and would resent being responsible in any way.
Men that are NOT the biological father should NOT be responsible in ANY WAY for a child that is not biologically theirs.
Men that are NOT the biological father should NOT be responsible in ANY WAY for a child that is not biologically theirs.
You may find this odd but many people actually love and care about the well being of children that are not, biologically, theirs. Being a parent has nothing to do with DNA.
He has the right to go for custody but you can't very well take away the child's mother either.
I'm assuming he will pay support because she, likely earns less and you have to look at the child's situation. If she outearns him, or it's close, by all means, have her pay him child support.
I do think the father has the right to sue the mother for emotional duress, just as parents of babies switched at birth would have the right to sue the hospital. It would be distressing to find that your child isn't your biological child when you thought they were.
I don't know if she should be taken away all together. I'm trying to think of what kind of person would do such a horrific thing. She might not be competent to even raise a child. Given the conditions of this conversation, I don't think she should have any kind of live in custody. I don't think it should matter if she earns less either. She created the mess, let her get two jobs, pay through the nose, see the kid every other weekend and alternating holidays. Maybe if that were the norm, these types of women would think twice before committing gross deception. And it wouldn't have to involve the rest of us.
Perhaps you guys misunderstood me. My idea would be implemented when a woman was seeking child support. She could only get it from a given man if he indeed was the father. This test would prove this. Simple scenario:
Woman has child with man A, but is in relationship with man B. She breaks up with Man B and decides she needs child support. She wants man B to pay the support, but he does not pass the dna test. So she brings man A and he does pass the test. Then he has to pay. This really isn't a genderwar thing or unfair either. This seems like a logical solution to a problem.
It's too late at that point. He is already established as the child's legal father and it would be wrong to take that away from the child. The only way it works is to establish at birth that he is not the father and find the bio dad so he can support his child.
What kind of impact would it have on, say, a 7 year old to be told "Your dad really isn't your dad, this stranger is". Sorry, if you want the ability to opt out, you need to exercise that right at birth. Yes, you now risk your relationship with the baby's mother but it's not like she was someone you valued and trusted so there's no great loss there if she leaves.
Sorry, but once you take on the role of parent to a child, you don't get to reneg. It's not fair to the child and the child has to come first.
Well, it's all in theory within the context of this crazy coversation. Don't mind me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by penguin_kernel
Perhaps you guys misunderstood me. My idea would be implemented when a woman was seeking child support. She could only get it from a given man if he indeed was the father. This test would prove this. Simple scenario:
Woman has child with man A, but is in relationship with man B. She breaks up with Man B and decides she needs child support. She wants man B to pay the support, but he does not pass the dna test. So she brings man A and he does pass the test. Then he has to pay. This really isn't a genderwar thing or unfair either. This seems like a logical solution to a problem.
Um, that's how it is already. Maybe I missed something?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ivorytickler
It only works if he wants the child. From the sounds of many posts here, without a biological link to the child, some men would want nothing to do with the child and would resent being responsible in any way.
Men that are NOT the biological father should NOT be responsible in ANY WAY for a child that is not biologically theirs.
How about fathers who adopted children? They are not the biological fathers -- are you saying they should get all the benefits of parenthood, but not be responsible in any way? How about fathers who consent, privately, to raise children that aren't biologically theirs as their own? How about infertile men, who decide with their wives to use a sperm donor?
In fact, you know what? At this point, I want to see some proof of this "paternity fraud" thing. In law school, I've read plenty of New York cases where lack of paternity was alleged in a divorce proceeding, and the father was off the hook as soon as it was established the kid wasn't his. So all these supposedly real cases where it goes the other way around -- now I want to read them. Because I suspect there is more to all these stories than the MRA's are telling us.
I don't know if she should be taken away all together. I'm trying to think of what kind of person would do such a horrific thing. She might not be competent to even raise a child. Given the conditions of this conversation, I don't think she should have any kind of live in custody. I don't think it should matter if she earns less either. She created the mess, let her get two jobs, pay through the nose, see the kid every other weekend and alternating holidays. Maybe if that were the norm, these types of women would think twice before committing gross deception. And it wouldn't have to involve the rest of us.
Problem is you have to look at the child's living conditions while with the mother.
I don't know if I buy not knowing who your baby daddy is equates to being an unfit parent. How many men lie to their wives about affairs? Are they unfit fathers? Maybe she panicked. Maybe once time passed, she felt it was too late to come clean. People lie for all kinds of reasons.
It only works if he wants the child. From the sounds of many posts here, without a biological link to the child, some men would want nothing to do with the child and would resent being responsible in any way.
I have to agree on behalf of the men. Why should a man who has been cheated on and lied to, then be forced to be responsible for a child that is not his.
If you meet a man and you know your pregnant and he makes that choice upfront then that is different but to lie and cheat and force it on him is just wrong.
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Being a parent has nothing to do with DNA.