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Okay ,whenever I ask her to tell me everything such as being truthful to me(or if I by mistake think she is cheating on me) she get's a attitude, cries out and claims that "I got trust issues" along with threating about leaving me or wanting to leave me.
While on the other hand, whenever she ask for my passwords to my Facebook account, email, asks for my phone and ask me where I'm at and what I'm doing. I tell her and give her those things WITH NO PROBLEM.
ALONG with TELLING HER EVERYTHING UPFRONT. WITH NO LIES
She even think i'm doing something with my good friend (which we been good friends since june 2012 who is a 40 something year old man name rony by the way) but i don't get mad cause I know how she feels.
Besides, I look at her jealousy as a good thing if you know what I mean.
Moderator note: OP's two threads on this topic have been merged into this one thread. If some posts seem out of order, it is because of the merge.
You've got a couple options. You can talk to her and explain the situation and why you don't like it. You can flip the tables on her and see if she opens her eyes, or you dump her.
Sounds to me like the problems are on both sides of the equation.
Besides, I look at her jealousy as a good thing if you know what I mean.
Sooo...what's the problem then?
If she doesn't see her own hypocrisy, she's either too immature to recognize it or she feels justified in it. If the jealousy isn't a problem, is she a hypocrite in other areas of your relationship?
I'm not always the nicest person in these situations, next time she demands your information...I'd mirror her reaction..."Boohoo, I can't believe you'd ask me that...you have serious trust issues." Make it dramatic. Oh, she'll get ticked...but maybe she'll have a different perspective of the situation.
You've got a couple options. You can talk to her and explain the situation and why you don't like it. You can flip the tables on her and see if she opens her eyes, or you dump her.
Sounds to me like the problems are on both sides of the equation.
You know. Maybe I should try option number 2 and shell see how I feel
If she doesn't see her own hypocrisy, she's either too immature to recognize it or she feels justified in it. If the jealousy isn't a problem, is she a hypocrite in other areas of your relationship?
I'm not always the nicest person in these situations, next time she demands your information...I'd mirror her reaction..."Boohoo, I can't believe you'd ask me that...you have serious trust issues." Make it dramatic. Oh, she'll get ticked...but maybe she'll have a different perspective of the situation.
Maybe she is a hypocrite and I should flip it to her so she can see how I feel
If she doesn't see her own hypocrisy, she's either too immature to recognize it or she feels justified in it. If the jealousy isn't a problem, is she a hypocrite in other areas of your relationship?
I'm not always the nicest person in these situations, next time she demands your information...I'd mirror her reaction..."Boohoo, I can't believe you'd ask me that...you have serious trust issues." Make it dramatic. Oh, she'll get ticked...but maybe she'll have a different perspective of the situation.
In this scenario that I had in mind,...if her hypocrisy is justified in her mind, it could be for any number of reasons. Her feelings are valued over yours, her activities are valued over yours, etc.
I had a friend who's girlfriend kept cheating on him. She was extremely jealous of other women around him, and when people would question her actions, she justified her cheating because "He doesn't give me the emotional support I need...too busy working, etc" and she was sincerely baffled that anyone thought she was a bad person for cheating on him.
Her justification in hypocrisy leaked into other areas of their relationship.
I.e. She hated cleaning the house although she didn't have an outside job. She would flip out on him when he came home because he never picked up anything (not true). I always thought she might have been projecting her own guilt for not doing anything during the day onto him. She always felt justified in her temper over this as she felt she did more house cleaning than he did.
I.e. She'd complain to friends about how he wanted to wait to have kids and she felt time was running out, but when he'd bring it up to her, she'd feel pressured and yell at him, saying that it felt like an ultimatum.
I.e. She was always upset that she was overweight, but when he tried to eat healthy, she'd start an argument and accuse him of trying to change her and not being attracted to her.
She finally started to recognize some of the behavior and went in for therapy, she was diagnosed as bi-polar and she used that as an excuse to re-justify her actions because "she was sick" and it wasn't her fault. He broke up with her, and I see her around town once in awhile and she always brings up what a horrible person he was for treating her so bad, for trying to change her weight, for not wanting kids with her, for never helping her around the house...and then finally, for breaking up with her because of her diagnosis. Some people can't change.
You know. Maybe I should try option number 2 and shell see how I feel
It always solves my problems
However, I'd take a deeper look into why you think she's cheating on you or why she thinks you are. If there's no logical explanation behind it, then it's something you need to fix in yourself.
Should I and Girlfriend go to Counsling since I KNOW I am right on certain things?
It's like that even though I know I'm right on certain things and if I tell it to someone else of what is happening between girlfriend and me they would agree.
My girlfriend, goes to counsling sometimes and listens.
Basically come to think of if, would it be better that if I go to counsling with her and tell the counsler about something that I know I'm right on, would that work? Especially since my girlfriend goes to counsling and had suggested that someday we do/should go to counsling?
"You know you're right" reeks of arrogance. Move on, next.
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Should I and Girlfriend go to Counsling since I KNOW I am right on certain things?
