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everyone's damaged. normal, happy people have been going along just fine, get into a relationship and have a spouse cheat/leave and it can do a number on them that effects them and other relationships they try to have for the rest of their lives. same thing with a mom who has 2 or 3 kids but lost one along the way. life damages you and changes you forever. work on the problem and not focus in on the symptons of the problem to define yourself. you won't feel any better to know all the "normal turds" find you more desirable if you didn't have a little condition going that you're having to deal with. "normal turds" have their own ways of turning you into "damaged goods" when you may have otherwise been fine before meeting them. everyone is damaged and everyone is ALWAYS dealing with a certain amount of PAIN in their lives. i had a big epiphany the other day... "try and live your life in such a way as to not add to anyone's existing pain". don't be ugly... always give a kind response... accept yourself and love yourself even if someone has referred to you as damaged. fight the urge to be fearful of such comments and what it may "mean" with how you're perceived and will anyone ever love you inspite of pain issues that EVERYONE has.
I know/knew people with eating disorders. They had a poor body image and low self-esteem because they couldn't meet the ideals that are portrayed in the media.
[however, you're right that the media doesn't directly cause it - it is their response to the media that causes it]
It's just what they use to feed their disorder (oh, bad pun), but having an eating disorder really has very little to do with being thin. Just like someone with OCD who washes their hands 20 times in a row isn't really trying to be hygienic.
It's just a pet peeve of mine when people simplify eating disorders down to being about achieving a certain image. It ignores the underlying cause.
Well at least now we know why some guys aren't dating, won't ever have a mate if ruling out women based on such criteria since some stats show quite a high number for the population of individuals that have or have had some sort of eating disorder.
Well at least now we know why some guys aren't dating, won't ever have a mate if ruling out women based on such criteria since some stats show quite a high number for the population of individuals that have or have had some sort of eating disorder.
Reread your stats, mate, that's not what they say in the least. It said 91% of college women had attempted to control their weight through dieting. That's not what an eating disorder is and doesn't even mean they were attempting to lose weight, but merely control it. Heck, all of us ought to use our diets to maintain control over our weight rather than let our weight control us.
Reread your stats, mate, that's not what they say in the least. It said 91% of college women had attempted to control their weight through dieting. That's not what an eating disorder is and doesn't even mean they were attempting to lose weight, but merely control it. Heck, all of us ought to use our diets to maintain control over our weight rather than let our weight control us.
Thanks for the correction, numbers are still high enough to take note.
We all have our issues. I'd say no. I don't think of people as "damaged goods." That's a rather fatalistic way of branding a person.
That said? I'm surprised that reading some of the nasty comments here on the Relationships forum hasn't scared anyone who was borderline into developing a disorder. Seriously. Some of the crap people spew on here sometimes.
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My man's ex abused laxatives and had bulimia. I would caution any man about getting involved with such a woman. It is painful to watch someone destroy herself that way, people with eating disorders are notoriously difficult to treat, and they tend to have extreme issues with self-esteem that, not to be cold or cruel about it, will drive a man up a wall. For these women, no reassurance is great enough, no affirmation strong enough, and the preoccupation with beauty and "perfection" takes over until the only two entities in the relationship are her and her disorder. Getting involved with a woman with an active eating disorder is like getting involved with a drug addict or alcoholic who is actively using.
If you (in the general) are a man and you catch your GF puking, refusing to eat, or exercising fanatically, and it's early in the relationship, leave, for your sake. You can't save her, you can't fix her, and you will make yourself miserable trying.
"Damaged Goods"...just because you've got an illness?
Are you damaged goods if you are diabetic, or have asthma?
One persons "damaged" might be another persons "but I love you anyway".
No one is born with a self inflicted eating disorder.
Back to the OP, (cut word filter bypass) yes she's damaged goods. Could never be with someone so selfish and insecure.
Last edited by RedZin; 10-24-2012 at 07:28 AM..
Reason: Removed word filter bypass. Cut that nonsense out.
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at least statistically according to above.
