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My relationship with my parents has been deteriorating since last year, particularly with my dad, mostly over college. I have been having trouble regarding math (and with that said, there is one class left before and I only need 3 credits to get my degree and it is College Mathematics.) after the last month or so my parents have grown very fed up with me and there are implications of throwing me out, my dad doesn't like me going for a degree in history to which he has straight told me if I go for history I might as well quit college, top that with the fact that we can never agree on what I'm going to do. I have tried getting a job, I've papered two towns with resume's all summer and I still have nothing, I barely have any money to my name. I'm 20 and just short of having a degree and nothing to put use to it. I have no idea where I'll be a year from now, much less 5-10 years from now.
My relationship with my parents has been deteriorating since last year, particularly with my dad, mostly over college. I have been having trouble regarding math (and with that said, there is one class left before and I only need 3 credits to get my degree and it is College Mathematics.) after the last month or so my parents have grown very fed up with me and there are implications of throwing me out, my dad doesn't like me going for a degree in history to which he has straight told me if I go for history I might as well quit college, top that with the fact that we can never agree on what I'm going to do. I have tried getting a job, I've papered two towns with resume's all summer and I still have nothing, I barely have any money to my name. I'm 20 and just short of having a degree and nothing to put use to it. I have no idea where I'll be a year from now, much less 5-10 years from now.
Your parents sound rough. What do YOU want to do? What do you love? Do you have any conspicuous talents or abilities or interests?
What is it you want to do? If you don't have an idea yet, what sort of skills do you have that could help you find a job doing something while you figure it out? Have you applied for every job in town? Even menial jobs? Custodian? McDonald's?
If you're getting your "degree" and you're only 20, is this a community college, or a traditional 4-year school? Are you sure it's accredited? On the one hand, I understand you wanting to pursue a subject that interests you. On the other, your dad has a point. Getting a history degree often does not lead to employment unless you're prepared to get a Masters and a PhD, and even then, those college jobs have fierce competition. Teaching is hard to get into right now as well. No, your life is not over, in fact, it's just beginning, but you need to face the reality that it's time to come up with a plan and execute it. Your parents are not responsible for supporting you forever. The time may come very soon where you'll need to pay for your own place, food, etc. You need to seriously think about what sort of work you want to do and how to get the qualifications to obtain that sort of job.
OMG Poor baby! You're ahead of a lot of other kids your age, though. You at least know you have a problem. Now is the time to a) get into graduate school and delay the inevitable OR b) start a business.
1. If you get a graduate degree in lieu of a job, your parents may be more supportive. Even if you're unemployed, they can at least feel proud that you're educated. If you go for a PHD, that's even better. If your grades are good, you may be able to get a fellowship.
2. Business? You may need to think of alternatives for future employment. Can you start a business? You may need to think out of the box for stuff that can make money. Strip club? Adult "talk" hotline? LOL I am actually serious.
3. Teaching? The US has a shortage of Math, Science and Special Education teachers. You already have a BA, maybe you can complete the requirements to teach special ed. It can be a rewarding and enjoyable career...that is also in demand and a viable option for liberal arts graduates.
*Finally, if you're having trouble in math: get a tutor. It's easy and they'll really help.
My relationship with my parents has been deteriorating since last year, particularly with my dad, mostly over college. I have been having trouble regarding math (and with that said, there is one class left before and I only need 3 credits to get my degree and it is College Mathematics.) after the last month or so my parents have grown very fed up with me and there are implications of throwing me out, my dad doesn't like me going for a degree in history to which he has straight told me if I go for history I might as well quit college, top that with the fact that we can never agree on what I'm going to do. I have tried getting a job, I've papered two towns with resume's all summer and I still have nothing, I barely have any money to my name. I'm 20 and just short of having a degree and nothing to put use to it. I have no idea where I'll be a year from now, much less 5-10 years from now.
Finish school and get your degree in history. There are many paths you can take with a college degree that don't have to be related to your major.
At least 50% of kids your age don't know what they want to do when they are older. You're not alone and you're not supposed to know where you'll be in 5-10 years... that's the joy and mystery of living your life!
Your parents sound rough. What do YOU want to do? What do you love? Do you have any conspicuous talents or abilities or interests?
I wouldn't call my parents "rough", just unwavering, I have been told several times that I should consider going to the military, or get a vocation at ITT Tech (my dad won't listen to the things I've told him about it anyway and how I don't trust ITT). I love history, always have, been a student of the American Civil War for a long time, but my dad says it will do me no good.
That's just the thing, even after I get the AA (which could be debateable) I really don't know what to be, or go for. We've fought over this so much that I just want to drop the issue.
I wouldn't call my parents "rough", just unwavering, I have been told several times that I should consider going to the military, or get a vocation at ITT Tech (my dad won't listen to the things I've told him about it anyway and how I don't trust ITT). I love history, always have, been a student of the American Civil War for a long time, but my dad says it will do me no good.
That's just the thing, even after I get the AA (which could be debateable) I really don't know what to be, or go for. We've fought over this so much that I just want to drop the issue.
Well, considering the employment situation, I also think a degree in History is quite impractical...
I wouldn't call my parents "rough", just unwavering, I have been told several times that I should consider going to the military, or get a vocation at ITT Tech (my dad won't listen to the things I've told him about it anyway and how I don't trust ITT). I love history, always have, been a student of the American Civil War for a long time, but my dad says it will do me no good.
That's just the thing, even after I get the AA (which could be debateable) I really don't know what to be, or go for. We've fought over this so much that I just want to drop the issue.
I think I am your mother. Ha ha, seriously you sound so much like my son.
I think if you had an actual plan, they would feel better about it. "Here is the career I want and here are the steps I need to take to get there." A major shouldn't be just a subject you like. It should reflect your future plans. Are you not planning on getting a bachelor degree? if not, why not? An AA doesn't go very far in this economy.
Also, I think it would help (if you haven't already) to enlist your parents' help in your job search. This can accomplish two things: They can see for themselves how many jobs you have already applied at AND maybe they have some tips that might help you. Ok, and there is a third benefit too. This will relieve some of the stress between you and your dad. I think he wants you to acknowledge that he DOES have wisdom to impart to you. You don't have to think that he does, just let him FEEL like he is helping you and then he will be on your team, instead of fighting against you (if that makes sense).
Good luck. My husband was out of work for 2 yrs and I know so many people felt like "he's just not looking hard enough/looking for the right jobs/etc etc". But the truth is that it really IS that bad out there. Which is all the more reason your relationship with your parents is more important than ever. They will be your support group during this difficult time.
You can't just major in the Liberal Arts without some sort of plan or career goal, i.e. do you want to be a teacher, librarian, writer, researcher, lawyer, antiques dealer, etc? What would you have to do to make that happen?
I majored in history and did get a job in my field, but I don't know that I'd recommend the same in today's economy. The thing is, you don't need to officially study history to study history. There are books and websites and historic locations where you can get your fix on your own time and your own dime.
Last edited by fleetiebelle; 07-15-2011 at 01:53 PM..
You know, I don't often suggest this, but go to talk to some military recruiters and ask them about your options of becoming of officer. Definitely don't just enlist or you'll be bored to tears.
Your parents aren't particularly good ones. They're controlling and it's time for you to take ownership of your life. Joining the military is a great way to get experience, get the rest of your degree paid for, learn how to be a grown up and become a leader of extremely well trained men and women.
Alternatively, just do whatever it is you need to do to get your degree done and then move anywhere where you can find a job and get the heck away from your parents. You don't have to stay close to your family.
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Well, considering the employment situation, I also think a degree in History is quite impractical...
It's a degree and not trade school. Someone who studies history knows how to think critically, research and come up with and defend their own ideas. That's much more practical than you might think. I have a less than practical background and I run circles around more practical co-workers.
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