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Put one foot in front of the other. Focus on the degree, then start brainstorming. Sounds like you are in a funk . . .no good decisions can be made while in a funk . . .so do something fun to cheer yourself up (something healthy), then hit the books and report back when you have graduated!
There are numerous websites that will help you get through this ONE math course. Nobody is good at everything. For me it was statistics. But I was not going to let this one course keep me from meeting my goals. When you have a stumbling block, you have to focus and let nothing stop you.
You can do this! If you can't find a job, make one. Have a lawn mower? Advertise "college boy helper". Have a truck? Help people clean out garage. Advertise to help single women around house. Help elderly by running errands for tips. You never know it just might turn into a pretty good business. Check out the job board at school. Post on the church bulletin board. Become a volunteer. It might turn into a paid position.
There are several on-line websites that you can bid on projects to research and write articles. Sign up at a temporary labor office. Think outside the box of a traditional job.
My relationship with my parents has been deteriorating since last year, particularly with my dad, mostly over college. I have been having trouble regarding math (and with that said, there is one class left before and I only need 3 credits to get my degree and it is College Mathematics.) after the last month or so my parents have grown very fed up with me and there are implications of throwing me out, my dad doesn't like me going for a degree in history to which he has straight told me if I go for history I might as well quit college, top that with the fact that we can never agree on what I'm going to do. I have tried getting a job, I've papered two towns with resume's all summer and I still have nothing, I barely have any money to my name. I'm 20 and just short of having a degree and nothing to put use to it. I have no idea where I'll be a year from now, much less 5-10 years from now.
Sounds like your parents are bluffing with certain consequences (like kicking you out possibly or not paying for school) as an effort to motivate you to take better control of your direction. At 20, I'm assuming here that you are aiming for an AA degree. What happened that you didn't apply yourself in high school enough to attend a university to pursue a 4-year degree? You have likely known even before high school that you had a problem with mathematics. Why didn't you buckle down and tackle this problem on your own? Do you spend a great deal of time playing with the Xbox, surfing the net, playing computer games, and so forth? This can be cause for your parents' frustration and your lack of focus on where you are going.
I would suggest that you spend more time getting to know yourself. You don't appear to have a clue what subjects you like and which ones you are good at. You don't have a clue about what you want to be when you grow up. With nothing to shoot for, you're just wandering in the wilderness with no direction. No wonder you don't know where you'll be in 5 years. I would think that in 5 years at 25, you'd be finishing a Master's degree or similar. You have some serious self-evaluation and homework to do IMO. Your parents obviously agree.
About your parents, no doubt they love you a great deal. Perhaps you have made it hard for them to show you this by your attitude and lack of focus. No doubt, they have struggled with you for quite some time over your focus and effort in academics. They are not going to kick you out on the street and they no doubt will do all they can to help you in your academic endeavors, provided you are challenging yourself and not settling for the easiest path to nowhere. Listen to your parents because they most likely know you better than you know yourself to a certain extent. If history is what you want to do, have a plan about what you will do with such a degree, and a very good reason why you chose this subject. What do your mom and dad do for a living? Maybe you would like one of their professions. How about thinking of yourself as a lawyer or doctor? Why not envision yourself as an engineer or psychologist? Plenty of options to explore if you put the time and effort into it.
I would not join the military. I would try to look at the issue in it's most basic form. The problem is actually a mental one. You have been taught to believe your worth as a person resides in the judgement and acceptance of others: the judgement of a school that dispenses grades or the judgement of an employer who dispenses money. In other words, your relations with people.
Your true self worth resides in your relationship to the Earth. So a school won't give you a degree? So an employer won't give you a job? Does that stop you from obtaining the resources you need to live on the Earth? If you need sustenance, pluck it from the trees or fish it from the rivers. If you need shelter, build it. If you need warmth, light a fire.
You love history, right? For 80% of human history there was no money and there were no employers and no education beyond how to obtain what you needed directly from nature. Why continue to rely on other people to produce a livelihood for you when such a line of thinking has failed you time and time again? The lesson is starring you in the face and hitting you on the head: Live simply. Return to basics.
You would learn more for the comfortable sustaining of your life at one of those back-to-nature outdoor seminars than in the military.
Secure a productive relationship with the Earth first, and any productive relationships you acquire later with others, such as employment or a degree, will just be icing instead of what they are now, pressure.
There are numerous websites that will help you get through this ONE math course. Nobody is good at everything. For me it was statistics. But I was not going to let this one course keep me from meeting my goals. When you have a stumbling block, you have to focus and let nothing stop you.
Your right.
You can do this! If you can't find a job, make one. Have a lawn mower? Advertise "college boy helper". Have a truck? Help people clean out garage. Advertise to help single women around house. Help elderly by running errands for tips. You never know it just might turn into a pretty good business. Check out the job board at school. Post on the church bulletin board. Become a volunteer. It might turn into a paid position.
Well, I talked it over with my dad last night, over the next month or so, when my younger sister starts school again, I'll still go to college but also stay with my alzheimers stricken grandma, and I'll get paid for it. It's not the best, but it's something.
There are several on-line websites that you can bid on projects to research and write articles. Sign up at a temporary labor office. Think outside the box of a traditional job.
Good luck!
I'll take a look at that! My comments in bold.
Quote:
Originally Posted by A_Lexus
Sounds like your parents are bluffing with certain consequences (like kicking you out possibly or not paying for school) as an effort to motivate you to take better control of your direction. At 20, I'm assuming here that you are aiming for an AA degree. What happened that you didn't apply yourself in high school enough to attend a university to pursue a 4-year degree? You have likely known even before high school that you had a problem with mathematics. Why didn't you buckle down and tackle this problem on your own? Do you spend a great deal of time playing with the Xbox, surfing the net, playing computer games, and so forth? This can be cause for your parents' frustration and your lack of focus on where you are going.
And yes, I am going for an AA. I did apply myself in High School, especially during my Senior year, I've had trouble with advanced math since at least Middle School. When I was still in High School, I would go to school, then to college, then to my job at the call center. I was in TWO schools at the same time, spending alot of those two years knocking out the elective credits. And yes, I do surf the web quite often (the Xbox died last year. ). It's been like this for a few years already, maybe because of all the stresses of being laid off and all that pushed me further in escapism. About 6 months ago I was 6 credits away from the degree, I was able to test out of the prerequisit class and get into the Math 140 I needed.
I would suggest that you spend more time getting to know yourself. You don't appear to have a clue what subjects you like and which ones you are good at. You don't have a clue about what you want to be when you grow up. With nothing to shoot for, you're just wandering in the wilderness with no direction. No wonder you don't know where you'll be in 5 years. I would think that in 5 years at 25, you'd be finishing a Master's degree or similar. You have some serious self-evaluation and homework to do IMO. Your parents obviously agree.
I guess so. We are always archenemies regarding alot of stuff, but for once, I agree with you!
About your parents, no doubt they love you a great deal. Perhaps you have made it hard for them to show you this by your attitude and lack of focus. No doubt, they have struggled with you for quite some time over your focus and effort in academics. They are not going to kick you out on the street and they no doubt will do all they can to help you in your academic endeavors, provided you are challenging yourself and not settling for the easiest path to nowhere. Listen to your parents because they most likely know you better than you know yourself to a certain extent. If history is what you want to do, have a plan about what you will do with such a degree, and a very good reason why you chose this subject. What do your mom and dad do for a living? Maybe you would like one of their professions. How about thinking of yourself as a lawyer or doctor? Why not envision yourself as an engineer or psychologist? Plenty of options to explore if you put the time and effort into it.
Light a candle, don't curse the darkness.
Huh, that does sound pretty good, but I wouldn't like to be what my dad is, he's even told me that I wouldn't like it (and I don't, he works in a very higher up public works job in the county seat, and he hates dealing with the public.)
My co-worker's degree is in history and she has done very well for herself. She is making $80K/yr as the head of personnel with her employer. This degree hasn't hurt her one bit.
I think a lot of employers nowadays aren't looking for people with specific degrees but ones they can hire and mold to their needs.
My relationship with my parents has been deteriorating since last year, particularly with my dad, mostly over college. I have been having trouble regarding math (and with that said, there is one class left before and I only need 3 credits to get my degree and it is College Mathematics.) after the last month or so my parents have grown very fed up with me and there are implications of throwing me out, my dad doesn't like me going for a degree in history to which he has straight told me if I go for history I might as well quit college, top that with the fact that we can never agree on what I'm going to do. I have tried getting a job, I've papered two towns with resume's all summer and I still have nothing, I barely have any money to my name. I'm 20 and just short of having a degree and nothing to put use to it. I have no idea where I'll be a year from now, much less 5-10 years from now.
#1 - Your life is not over.
#2 - You might be confused right now, but this will pass.
#3 - Being 20-something can be rough and you don't know how to proceed. Don't let anyone tell you that they didn't have these moments in their 20's! You think you have to plan your entire life right now from the life experience of a 20-year-old.
You sound so much like my son! He has been a History major, heading into Senior year. He's not sure he wants to return to the school he has attended. He doesn't care for it (in Vermont), but with one year to go it's a shame to not focus on the end result and have that degree this time next year. His hesitation may be related to a Math course he has to take.
"Desert Kid" - Please hang in there and do not give up. Don't let anyone tell you that what you are interested in is not okay for you to pursue. You get that degree; that's the most important thing.
You will find some type of job, and maybe you'll go on to graduate school. Your parents are frustrated because they worry about you. That's all it is: fear for their kid who they love so much.
Do not let your fears take over your mind. Very few people of any age can plan their lives 1 - 5 years in advance. Put your focus on getting the degree that you enjoy and take it one step at a time. If you have a passion, go after it. Your path will eventually lead you to where you need to go. You have a gut feeling as to what you ought to do; but the words and emotions of others are interferring with that inner knowing.
If I could go back to my 20's and just follow my gut (not what everyone else told me I should do with my life) I know I would have been fine.
You will be fine. Do not give up.
My relationship with my parents has been deteriorating since last year, particularly with my dad, mostly over college. I have been having trouble regarding math (and with that said, there is one class left before and I only need 3 credits to get my degree and it is College Mathematics.) after the last month or so my parents have grown very fed up with me and there are implications of throwing me out, my dad doesn't like me going for a degree in history to which he has straight told me if I go for history I might as well quit college, top that with the fact that we can never agree on what I'm going to do. I have tried getting a job, I've papered two towns with resume's all summer and I still have nothing, I barely have any money to my name. I'm 20 and just short of having a degree and nothing to put use to it. I have no idea where I'll be a year from now, much less 5-10 years from now.
Life is a path with hills on it. We can't see over the hill. But once you get there, you might find something quite pleasing. Life can ALWAYS change. Whatever situation the person is in at the moment, COULD change tomorrow. There are many unpredictable things that could happen in life. So hang in there and if you don't like your life now, you might like it a year later.
My brother was in a hopeless situation, no schooling, no real friends, no job prospects, no nothing. But then a girl came along and they got hooked up and now he is with her and her parents and they are helping him to go to college and he is considering a degree.... life couldn't have been more different for him now.
Also there is an expression: when God closes the door, he opens a window. Things could happen from unexpected sources.
OP: your parents sound so very cruel I am so sorry to hear about your challenges.
In the end, you have to do what *you* want....what makes *you* happy. Your dad is effectively trying to live your life, for you. Don't let him. Stand up to him; you are an adult already. And if he doesn't like it, well then too bad...b/c there's nothing he can do about it. It's not like you're 16 anymore, where he can just tell you what to do and what he says goes.
You're a full adult in your own right...stand up to your old man, and tell him "Enough is enough! You don't run my life...back off"!
Last edited by Phoenix2017; 07-16-2011 at 06:25 PM..
I completely disagree with this. I struggled with Algebra and Geometry for years. I studied for HOURS every single night with my dad. I eventually went in to the military and was preparing to take my college entrance exams and again, there was the math. A Lt. helped me study and I retained a little but it just was not clicking. For years, I sure as hell DID make an effort! No, I'm not retarded.
Then, one day, in college, I was in the lounge, with a friend, again trying to "get" this algebra. It was not clicking, it made no sense, I could not understand. A girl was sitting on one of the couches in the lounge and asked, "What are you trying to figure out?"
I explained to her I was working on my algebra and that I just don't get it. No exaggeration at all, that girl talked to me for 5 minutes and within that 5 minutes, it all clicked. All of it. All of it suddenly made sense. For years I had struggled and studied and worked hard at it...but this one girl, a stranger, talked to me for 5 minutes and all of it made sense. I distinctly remember asking, "Why on earth didn't anyone just say it that way in the beginning!??!"
I befriended this girl and started to love algebra. We would go to Denny's with my algebra homework and to study for upcoming tests. I couldn't wait to get home to do my algebra homework. I was delighted, I was getting it, it was fun figuring it out....but if not for that girl, I would never have made it through college.
So, no, it's not that someone isn't trying hard or is retarded, sometimes, it's HOW the teaching is presented. Sometimes just saying it another way can make all the difference in the world. I will never forget that girl. Ever.
I agree 1000%! It is all in the presentation...*how* it is taught. Poster above said it absolutely perfectly
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). It's been like this for a few years already, maybe because of all the stresses of being laid off and all that pushed me further in escapism. About 6 months ago I was 6 credits away from the degree, I was able to test out of the prerequisit class and get into the Math 140 I needed.
I am so sorry to hear about your challenges.
