Post your trivial 1st world problems (humor thread) (husband, people, everything)
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I have a stack of books checked out from the library. I am reading the longest one now, Barkskins, by Annie Proulx. This a 476 page book! I am a pretty fast reader, but if I read this book, I know I will not get many of the others read. Phooey!
My Granddaughter painted a lovely picture of a faerie for me to hang on my wall. She is almost 4, and did a great job. BUT--I had to ask her which end was the top. She was not amused, good thing she loves Gwamma.
My husband and I went to the KitchenAid factory and factory store, which was like a little taste of heaven (and possibly the only taste I will ever have). We spent beaucoup dollars. As luck would have it, I found a $20 kettle in a particular blue and fell in love with it, so I matched up the MUCH more expensive mixer with this $20 blue kettle. We proceeded to buy attachments, pots and pans, you name it - so much fabulous stuff that the staff had to take our goods out to the truck on a dolly.
We were on a road trip from Ohio to Texas, so we didn't unpack anything till we got home several days later.
Wouldn't you know it - they forgot to pack up the KETTLE. And yes, they charged us for it - it's on the long, elaborate receipt.
So I called them and explained that they hadn't packed the kettle and I wanted them to send me a blue one. I mean, we bought so much stuff, surely they don't think I'm trying to pull a fast one over a $20 kettle, right? But I get this suspicious, obstinate, oppositional person on the phone - a person, by the way, whose voice could be a man's voice - or a woman's voice - I couldn't tell, so I will call that person "Pat."
Me: "blah blah blah...so the kettle was never put in our vehicle, and we just now realized it because we just unpacked everything."
Pat: "Well, that's a problem, because when we forget to put something in a customer's car" (wait a minute - this is a TYPICAL issue???) "we always put it up near the cash register."
Long silence. Then I say:
Me: "So is there a blue kettle up by your cash register?" (Why do I even have to ask that?)
Pat: (Sigh) "Let me go see." (Long silence.)
Pat: (Huffing) "Yes, there is a kettle up here by the cash register. Did you say you saw the kettle in the box? Because there's nothing on the box which indicates what color the kettles are." (Yeah, right - I don't believe that but whatever - surely people who are buying a KitchenAid kettle don't depend on luck of the draw when it comes to the color.)
Me: "Listen. I saw a blue kettle. The salesperson took it out of the box in order for me to match up my FOUR HUNDRED DOLLAR MIXER with that particular blue. That was the kettle I bought."
Pat: "Well, this kettle was closed up in a box, and it's a red one."
Me: "Then that's not the kettle I want. I want a blue one."
Pat: "Well, this is a problem because I can't go opening up every box trying to find you a blue one - and besides that, they're not $20, they're $39."
Me: (Starting to feel the urge to kill) "Pat. Listen to me. I don't know what the salesperson did with the BLUE KETTLE that I bought Saturday. I don't know what BLUE KETTLES cost today. All I know is that I bought a BLUE KETTLE FOR $20 SATURDAY and it is clearly notated on the receipt that I have IN MY HAND AT THIS MOMENT. However, the salesperson who packed up our order and loaded it into our car FORGOT TO PUT THE BLUE KETTLE INTO OUR CAR. So, I want you to send me a BLUE KETTLE IN THE MAIL TODAY."
(Long silence.)
Pat: "I can send you a kettle but I can't promise you that it will be a blue one because I am not allowed to open up a bunch of boxes just to see what color the kettles inside are."
Me: (Head exploding) "Pat. Please understand this. I spent FOUR HUNDRED DOLLARS on a mixer that I matched up with the BLUE KETTLE. I don't care about your policy about opening boxes. I don't care about where the salesperson put or didn't put the BLUE KETTLE I BOUGHT SATURDAY. I don't care what kettles cost today because on Saturday, they cost $20. All I need for you to do is send me a BLUE KETTLE today."
Pat: "Well, OK. But if you don't like it, you need to understand that you're stuck with it."
(Yeah, right - it better be blue and it better be in excellent condition.)
My husband and I went to the KitchenAid factory and factory store, which was like a little taste of heaven (and possibly the only taste I will ever have). We spent beaucoup dollars. As luck would have it, I found a $20 kettle in a particular blue and fell in love with it, so I matched up the MUCH more expensive mixer with this $20 blue kettle. We proceeded to buy attachments, pots and pans, you name it - so much fabulous stuff that the staff had to take our goods out to the truck on a dolly.
We were on a road trip from Ohio to Texas, so we didn't unpack anything till we got home several days later.
Wouldn't you know it - they forgot to pack up the KETTLE. And yes, they charged us for it - it's on the long, elaborate receipt.
So I called them and explained that they hadn't packed the kettle and I wanted them to send me a blue one. I mean, we bought so much stuff, surely they don't think I'm trying to pull a fast one over a $20 kettle, right? But I get this suspicious, obstinate, oppositional person on the phone - a person, by the way, whose voice could be a man's voice - or a woman's voice - I couldn't tell, so I will call that person "Pat."
Me: "blah blah blah...so the kettle was never put in our vehicle, and we just now realized it because we just unpacked everything."
Pat: "Well, that's a problem, because when we forget to put something in a customer's car" (wait a minute - this is a TYPICAL issue???) "we always put it up near the cash register."
Long silence. Then I say:
Me: "So is there a blue kettle up by your cash register?" (Why do I even have to ask that?)
Pat: (Sigh) "Let me go see." (Long silence.)
Pat: (Huffing) "Yes, there is a kettle up here by the cash register. Did you say you saw the kettle in the box? Because there's nothing on the box which indicates what color the kettles are." (Yeah, right - I don't believe that but whatever - surely people who are buying a KitchenAid kettle don't depend on luck of the draw when it comes to the color.)
Me: "Listen. I saw a blue kettle. The salesperson took it out of the box in order for me to match up my FOUR HUNDRED DOLLAR MIXER with that particular blue. That was the kettle I bought."
Pat: "Well, this kettle was closed up in a box, and it's a red one."
Me: "Then that's not the kettle I want. I want a blue one."
Pat: "Well, this is a problem because I can't go opening up every box trying to find you a blue one - and besides that, they're not $20, they're $39."
Me: (Starting to feel the urge to kill) "Pat. Listen to me. I don't know what the salesperson did with the BLUE KETTLE that I bought Saturday. I don't know what BLUE KETTLES cost today. All I know is that I bought a BLUE KETTLE FOR $20 SATURDAY and it is clearly notated on the receipt that I have IN MY HAND AT THIS MOMENT. However, the salesperson who packed up our order and loaded it into our car FORGOT TO PUT THE BLUE KETTLE INTO OUR CAR. So, I want you to send me a BLUE KETTLE IN THE MAIL TODAY."
(Long silence.)
Pat: "I can send you a kettle but I can't promise you that it will be a blue one because I am not allowed to open up a bunch of boxes just to see what color the kettles inside are."
Me: (Head exploding) "Pat. Please understand this. I spent FOUR HUNDRED DOLLARS on a mixer that I matched up with the BLUE KETTLE. I don't care about your policy about opening boxes. I don't care about where the salesperson put or didn't put the BLUE KETTLE I BOUGHT SATURDAY. I don't care what kettles cost today because on Saturday, they cost $20. All I need for you to do is send me a BLUE KETTLE today."
Pat: "Well, OK. But if you don't like it, you need to understand that you're stuck with it."
(Yeah, right - it better be blue and it better be in excellent condition.)
OK...so our Mac computer took an unusually long time to boot up today. It usually boots up in about 10-15 seconds. It took almost 1 minute this morning. 1 minute of my life has been wasted and I am not too happy with that!
Kathryn, I hope you get your blue kettle. Keep us updated.
Yesterday I wanted kettlecorn. Today Mr. brought some home without knowing I wanted it. Yay! Then a piece poked me on my swollen gums, which I'd forgotten about. Good god did it hurt. Now I'm uncomfortably full because I ate too much. Like I was gonna let pain stop me.
Forced update crashed my iPad.
Totally worthless.
Bought brand new in March.
Apple refuses to help.
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Good god did it hurt. Now I'm uncomfortably full because I ate too much. Like I was gonna let pain stop me.
