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Some kids already have their own sense of style. And some you can dress up all you want a certain way and one day they'll decide they want to put on something completely different. Trendy does not have to = expensive or brand names. My daughter (7 years old) loves to accessorize and layer her outfits and already has a fashion sense that is beyond me. For the most part I buy her clothes I think are age appropriate cute (i still buy her shirts with kittens and cupcakes on them) and she makes it her own by adding her accessories to her outfits.
I think its easy to forget as parents how something little for us can be such a big deal for a child.
As a 7 yr old I once told my dad that in my class, so-and-so was smarter then me. He said "no he isn't - you're the smartest kid in that class, heh, heh." I think he said that jokingly, certainly not threatening, not in the least.
I mulled that over a bit. I did not want my dad to be wrong. I mean...that's my dad! How could he be wrong?
A little more effort in school (just to make sure I got better marks than that kid, but nothing real exasperating).....and in less then two years I wound up getting double promoted. Biggest confidence booster I ever got - "A" student for the rest of my school years, always first chair cellist in the orchestra. And no stress I might add.
That's the way you "parent." It really can concern anything. If the kid mentions it, its probably important to them. Respond appropriately and non confrontationally. They'll handle the rest.
Boys often care a lot about the brand of athletic shoe (or equipment) they have. Or sunglasses. Or car. Etc.
My son started working seasonal jobs as soon as he was legally able (14) He was very definite about shoes and which stores he shopped at.Until he got his licence and truck we had to provide transportation to the stores but he bought what he wanted.
This is something I struggle with my now teen. As a child myself, I couldn't care less about fashion and just wore what I liked. My mom used to try to push certain styles on me but I wouldn't wear them.
I try hard for my kids to walk in their own footsteps and not follow what their peers are wearing/doing. It isn't that I want them to be unique as an individual but to wear or like something because they like it and not because it's the trend. At the same time, I don't want them to feel awkward/teased for not wearing the style either. Kids are so cruel sometimes. It's a hard balance and fine line to walk.
The thread on jeggings reminded me of this. Do you think it's helpful to have your kids look somewhat in style? Do you allow them to wear all trendy clothes or none of the trendy and opting for classics/long wearing etc?
ETA: This got lost in the OP somehow. I had a paragraph on how I allow my kids to buy whatever they want as long as it isn't too sexy/trashy or it looks good on them. So far it's been not too much of a struggle but I have had to steer them away from a certain trend and into something else. As my oldest gets older and more into an idea of how she wants to look, I hope it's for what she likes and not what her peers are wearing.
I actually pushed my son to be an individual and NOT follow the lead of others. I felt it was very important to instill this in him, early. I always was like that, (still am) and I think it's a far better thing to be comfortable with yourself and making your own path - not worrying about what others are doing and trying to follow them. As a result, my son became the most excellent dresser. Very "GQ"....very non-faddish. No pants hanging off his butt - ever. He even wore a suit to high school, occasionally. And oddly enough, a whole crew of his buddies that ALSO took to dressing in a more formal and "old school" manner. My son has more ties than most men I know, and he's only 20.
I actually pushed my son to be an individual and NOT follow the lead of others. I felt it was very important to instill this in him, early. I always was like that, (still am) and I think it's a far better thing to be comfortable with yourself and making your own path - not worrying about what others are doing and trying to follow them. As a result, my son became the most excellent dresser. Very "GQ"....very non-faddish. No pants hanging off his butt - ever. He even wore a suit to high school, occasionally. And oddly enough, a whole crew of his buddies that ALSO took to dressing in a more formal and "old school" manner. My son has more ties than most men I know, and he's only 20.
Boys often care a lot about the brand of athletic shoe (or equipment) they have. Or sunglasses. Or car. Etc.
Teens generally want to "fit in" with their peer group. Both boys and girls - the things they care about might differ somewhat but in my experience they both care (or, as has been mentioned, some individuals care more than other individuals). I don't necessarily think it's wrong or that those kids who don't care are somehow "more worthy" than those who do. I think the main thing from a parenting point of view is to not negate their feelings but to help them put them in proper perspective . After all, most of us have things that we like or want for reasons that others may find silly or inconsequential as well.
Yes they do. With my kids it was my oldest son who cared the most about labels. His younger sister cared more about a certain style but the labels didn't really matter. The problem with my son is that the labels he thought he should have were really expensive and not affordable so I finally just got him a gift card with the amount I was going to spend on him for school clothes and told him to buy what he could from the card instead of arguing about it.
He realized very quickly that he could get one pair of pants on one shirt if he went with the "cool" label so he wised up and found he could have 4 or 5 pairs of pants and 4 or 5 shirts if he found similar styles with a store label. He was considered cool at school and other guys at school asked him where he got his clothes and started showing up with his same "non" label (store label) on their clothes when they had previously had the "cool" label.
I actually pushed my son to be an individual and NOT follow the lead of others. I felt it was very important to instill this in him, early. I always was like that, (still am) and I think it's a far better thing to be comfortable with yourself and making your own path - not worrying about what others are doing and trying to follow them. As a result, my son became the most excellent dresser. Very "GQ"....very non-faddish. No pants hanging off his butt - ever. He even wore a suit to high school, occasionally. And oddly enough, a whole crew of his buddies that ALSO took to dressing in a more formal and "old school" manner. My son has more ties than most men I know, and he's only 20.
I think that teens need to learn when to follow the trend and when to blaze their own path. It is important to learn how to dress for different situations. Sometimes you want to follow the lead of others (like when you start a new job).
I think that teens need to learn when to follow the trend and when to blaze their own path. It is important to learn how to dress for different situations. Sometimes you want to follow the lead of others (like when you start a new job).
My personal opinion here of course, but I think it's quite critical to learn how to be happy and content with one's own self, early in life. Following the lead of others might work in some jobs but certainly not all of them. If you have a good sense of yourself, and have learned self confidence and a sense of leadership, that will be the best foundation to head into adulthood.
Boys often care a lot about the brand of athletic shoe (or equipment) they have. Or sunglasses. Or car. Etc.
Teens generally want to "fit in" with their peer group. Both boys and girls - the things they care about might differ somewhat but in my experience they both care (or, as has been mentioned, some individuals care more than other individuals). I don't necessarily think it's wrong or that those kids who don't care are somehow "more worthy" than those who do. I think the main thing from a parenting point of view is to not negate their feelings but to help them put them in proper perspective . After all, most of us have things that we like or want for reasons that others may find silly or inconsequential as well.
Really?
I come from a town with a very big reputation for materialism and superficiality. How you look and what you drive. Student section of high school parking lot much nicer than the teachers'...bmw to corvette to whatever. Because of the area and because of the dress code for the public school system, people came to school looking put together.
But I never saw my guy friends acting like they cared about their clothes or shoes or whatever. Nor did I see my little brother bother with that stuff. Maybe it's because all these guys were really smart and they had their niche where they had nothing to prove - honors courses, athletics, and ROTC.
Maybe it's the people who don't fit in anywhere and aren't comfortable with who they are. Maybe if you have something that is yours and you are secure in your abilities and accomplishments, you don't need stupid stuff like shoes.
I have a feeling this extends to adults, too... hmmmmm...
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Very "GQ"....very non-faddish. No pants hanging off his butt - ever. He even wore a suit to high school, occasionally. And oddly enough, a whole crew of his buddies that ALSO took to dressing in a more formal and "old school" manner. My son has more ties than most men I know, and he's only 20. 
