What to do in this situation....if anything (teaching, appropriate, smart)
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My son will be 8 this month. He has, according to others, a huge problem keeping his mouth shut. His teachers complain about his talking, his tae kwon do instructor complains about his talking, and I even complain about his talking (sometimes my ears just get so tired of listening to what he is going to build) and it is really wearing me down. On one hand, I remember when I was a kid, we had the talkers, the class clowns, the class bully, and everything in between and we all survived and learned. What is wrong with talking because you are excited to learn something new in tae kwon do? I guess I am losing patience with people who put kids into boxes and expect them to be seen but not heard at all times. He is respectful, very bright, eager to learn, and thrives on attention (probably from being an only kid), but never seems to fit the right cookie cutter.
There is a wide range of normal and I guess I am tired of trying to shove him into a mold that suits others. He really only talks when he's bored or excited (both happen quite often during the day...lol). He is testing way above grade level but because of his talking the school will not put him in a more appropriate class. He just got promoted to intermediate class in tae kwon do but now the instructor is threatening to move him back to beginner because of his talking. I'm really not trying to make excuses for him and his seeming lack of self control but then again, I wonder how much self control one really has at this age. I was always the quiet one, my friends were like my son and couldn't be quiet to save their life. I was not called "normal" and them "problem children".
Does anyone have experience with talkative children? Is this normal for martial arts classes to be so demanding of children or is this guy just on a power trip? The instructor was really nice and was trying to help my son learn "self control" while in beginner class but now expects him to act like an adult in intermediate class.
He is testing way above grade level but because of his talking the school will not put him in a more appropriate class.
You're kidding.
He is EXACTLY the kid they should be putting into more difficult classes.
One question: When he starts talking in class at school does he talk about the subject or something else entirely? (If they're studying history does he talk about history or something else entirely? Like what he ate for breakfast that morning.)
If he is talking at inappropriate times, being interruptive and making it difficult for others to study, learn, concentrate . . . then you are doing him -- and everyone else -- a disservice by justifying his behavior. I know you said you aren't trying to justify it, but then you go on to do just that, lol.
Your child does not have the right to disturb everyone else in his space. At eight, he should recognize that dominating conversations and being disruptive (even out of curiosity) is not just a matter of being impolite - it can also be truly debilitating to others around him trying to learn or study.
I am no child development expert, but perhaps you should have him evaluated (for what, I have no clue -- maybe others will know what inappropriate, continual, disruptive chatter might indicate).
Ask yourself this: are other children behaving and able to fit in? If so, then you need to stop shifting emphasis to "instructor being on a power trip" and focus instead on figuring out how to help your son get control over his utterances b/f he not only alienates his teachers, but dooms himself to social isolation from other children.
He has, according to others, a huge problem keeping his mouth shut. His teachers complain about his talking, his tae kwon do instructor complains about his talking, and I even complain about his talking (sometimes my ears just get so tired of listening to what he is going to build) and it is really wearing me down.
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Is this normal for martial arts classes to be so demanding of children or is this guy just on a power trip?
Since others, including his teachers and even you, have issues with his talking... then, no. The class is not too demanding, and the instructor is not on a power trip.
He needs to learn when it is appropriate to talk, and more importantly, when to LISTEN to others.
He is EXACTLY the kid they should be putting into more difficult classes.
One question: When he starts talking in class at school does he talk about the subject or something else entirely? (If they're studying history does he talk about history or about what he ate for breakfast that morning?)
It varied...sometimes he was "helping" explain the assignment or sometimes he was replying to the kid who talked first. He likes just about everyone, gets along with everyone, and loves to help. He doesn't realize that his voice is very distinctive and the more excited he is, the more high pitched and squeaky it gets. It's pretty funny really.
It varied...sometimes he was "helping" explain the assignment or sometimes he was replying to the kid who talked first. He likes just about everyone, gets along with everyone, and loves to help. He doesn't realize that his voice is very distinctive and the more excited he is, the more high pitched and squeaky it gets. It's pretty funny really.
Funny? Really? Sounds as annoying as hell, for both teachers and students.
Sounds to me like all this "love to help" stuff relates to what another poster said . . . he needs to stop talking, stop trying to do the teacher's job, and start listening and respecting everyone else's right to learn without continual class disturbances b/c of your son's need to keep the attention on himself.
He is the only 8 year old in the tae kwon do class...the rest of the class are 13 and up. I do think there is a big difference between what an 8 year old can do and what a 13 year old can do. Here is what happened in class last night: the class was shown a new move that had pairs pushing each other and trying to maintain their ground....everyone was laughing and my son was saying "this is fun" (that earned him 10 push ups). Then the instructor showed a different move to the yellow belts where they had to throw another person to the ground...my son said "don't die" (and that earned him 20 push ups). Then the instructor showed some jump kicks and someone broke a board by jumping in the air and kicking it... My son was very excited by seeing this and screached "that was awesome....great job" and earned 50 push ups for that. After class while my son was putting his shoes and socks on, the instructor came over to us and told him "the intermediate class is a privaliage, not a right! If you don't keep your mouth shut then you will be back in beginners class for as long as it takes you to learn to not speak.".
In some ways I understand, but a part of me just wants to tell his instructor off because my son was just acting like a normal little kid.
Funny? Really? Sounds as annoying as hell, for both teachers and students.
Sounds to me like all this "love to help" stuff relates to what another poster said . . . he needs to stop talking, stop trying to do the teacher's job, and start listening and respecting everyone else's right to learn without continual class disturbances b/c of your son's need to keep the attention on himself.
There were 15 children on behavioral contracts in his class. He is the top of his class academically and the teacher even asked him to help with tutoring other kids in math and reading.
He is the only 8 year old in the tae kwon do class...the rest of the class are 13 and up. I do think there is a big difference between what an 8 year old can do and what a 13 year old can do. Here is what happened in class last night: the class was shown a new move that had pairs pushing each other and trying to maintain their ground....everyone was laughing and my son was saying "this is fun" (that earned him 10 push ups). Then the instructor showed a different move to the yellow belts where they had to throw another person to the ground...my son said "don't die" (and that earned him 20 push ups). Then the instructor showed some jump kicks and someone broke a board by jumping in the air and kicking it... My son was very excited by seeing this and screached "that was awesome....great job" and earned 50 push ups for that. After class while my son was putting his shoes and socks on, the instructor came over to us and told him "the intermediate class is a privaliage, not a right! If you don't keep your mouth shut then you will be back in beginners class for as long as it takes you to learn to not speak.".
In some ways I understand, but a part of me just wants to tell his instructor off because my son was just acting like a normal little kid.
Martial arts is about self control and discipline.
Your son is not acting in an appropriate manner. Not every single thing in life requires a comment. You need to help your son learn this. It is not his job to explain the assignment to everyone else. He has got to learn when it is appropriate to talk and when it is not. You need to get on board with teaching him. 8 is plenty old enough to learn when to shut up.
There were 15 children on behavioral contracts in his class. He is the top of his class academically and the teacher even asked him to help with tutoring other kids in math and reading.
How smart is he? Have you had him tested?
Is he off-the-charts smart? Medium smart?
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