News, Punishment without spanking. (kids, problem, fighting, best)
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
"Violence" is defined as the use of physical force with the intent to damage or abuse. Now show me some evidence supporting your claim that parents who spank intend to damage their child.
Quote:
Is it problematic to you that I think you are misguided?
The only thing misguided is for someone to arrogantly assert that their method of child rearing is superior to someone else's. I was spanked as a child, and I believe that I'm better off because of it. You're in no place to tell me otherwise.
"Violence" is defined as the use of physical force with the intent to damage or abuse. Now show me some evidence supporting your claim that parents who spank intend to damage their child.
That is ONE of the definitions of violence. Also in the dictionary you will find
rough or injurious physical force, action, or treatment
an unjust or unwarranted exertion of force or power, as against rights or laws
I think both of those apply. Every other human in the world would argue that they have a right to be free of force from another person. Why not a child?
Quote:
The only thing misguided is for someone to arrogantly assert that their method of child rearing is superior to someone else's. I was spanked as a child, and I believe that I'm better off because of it. You're in no place to tell me otherwise.
So you think it is not possible for a person's parenting to be wrong? That one holds a belief makes it right? That is crazy.
My children were all raised without the hitting. They did the same kinds of things but there are other methods. I think we can all agree that there are multiple ways that WORK to correct dangerous behaviors.
But I still have not heard anything that contradicts the fact that spanking tells children the most fundamental way (by actually doing) that it is okay for some people to hit other people. The fact that we are telling them through our actions that it is acceptable for people who LOVE them to hit them is why I have an issue with corporal punishment.
I was spanked on the butt up until about age 5 or 6. As an adult (and as a child), I've never felt the need to "hit" anyone. I don't hate my parents for it either. But there was an element of fear when I did something wrong as a little kid. But I believe that's healthy. I've seen kids who will yell at their parents or even hit them, and their parents ignore it or try to reason with them. Why wouldn't I have hit my mother at age 5? Fear of what would happen!
What I can't stand is parents who just stand there while their little 2/3/4 year old scrams and throws a tantrum in public and they seem unable to do anything about it. If my kids does that in public, I have no problem with picking him up and physically removing him to the car or anywhere else so he can ride out his tantrum. Standing there trying to reason with a 3 year old is like beating your head against a wall! Some parents seem to take the whole anti-spanking thing to an extreme, thinking they can't even physically restrain a child.
That is ONE of the definitions of violence. Also in the dictionary you will find
rough or injurious physical force, action, or treatment
an unjust or unwarranted exertion of force or power, as against rights or laws
I think both of those apply. Every other human in the world would argue that they have a right to be free of force from another person. Why not a child?
Except that it isn't law or a right that any child should be free from any form of force.
It's obvious that you don't realize that you are trying to force your personal beliefs on others.
Quote:
So you think it is not possible for a person's parenting to be wrong? That one holds a belief makes it right? That is crazy.
No, I believe that if you can prove beyond a reasonable doubt that the child is indeed being abused or is having their well being jeopardized, and will suffer through damage because of it, then you're in a place to call it wrong; otherwise, you need to just mind your own business.
Except that it isn't law or a right that any child should be free from any form of force.
There is an OR in there. Rights OR law. I believe that as with every other human being, a child has that RIGHT.
Quote:
It's obvious that you don't realize that you are trying to force your personal beliefs on others.
No, I am having a discussion of my thoughts on the internet.
Quote:
No, I believe that if you can prove beyond a reasonable doubt that the child is indeed being abused, and will suffer through damage because of it,
So not abusing your child is where you put the bar? See, I hope to be better and more effective than simply not abusing my kids. Failing to abuse my kids is easy.
Quote:
then you're in a place to call it wrong; otherwise, you need to just mind your own business.
You do know that this is a forum for sharing ideas? Posting and reading here is optional.
There is an OR in there. Rights OR law. I believe that as with every other human being, a child has that RIGHT.
No, I am having a discussion of my thoughts on the internet.
So not abusing your child is where you put the bar? See, I hope to be better and more effective than simply not abusing my kids. Failing to abuse my kids is easy.
You do know that this is a forum for sharing ideas? Posting and reading here is optional.
YOU believe. I do not believe the same, so now we've arrived back at you suggesting everyone should think like you.
My mother believed that physical discipline was right for me. She did it because she loved me, and I'm grateful for it.
No more or less than anyone else who posts an opinion on an internet forum.
Not at all. In my very first post I stated that spanking may not be necessary for all households. Not once did I criticize parents who choose not to spank.
Quote:
Originally Posted by somebodynew
My parents also used spanking. I would maintain that it was the least effective tool in their toolbox.
Not at all. In my very first post I stated that spanking may not be necessary for all households. Not once did I criticize parents who choose not to spank.
So my thinking that spanking is not the best choice to make somehow criticizes your choice? If I think eating carrots is not the best choice, does that criticize your choice to eat carrots?
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
