Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I had a 12am curfew during the week days and a 2am curfew on weekends. But I have mixed feelings about giving college kids curfews. I'm sure my thoughts on this will become more firm as my own kids get older.
A typical 18 year old college student is plenty old enough to take care of the animals and himself while you are away. Let him know that you are going away for the weekend and tell him that you fully expect him to take care of things while you're away.
If you have serious doubts about your son's ability to handle this, have a friend or relative drop by to check on him (let your son know that someone might drop by, it shouldn't be a complete surprise to him).
If necessary, let him know that if any problems arise you'll be hiring a house sitter to stay in the house with your son next time.
For those that are parent's of an 18 year old still living at home, what do you think their curfew should be during the week when going to college and Friday and Sat nights?
Also, my husband and myself have not been away alone together for years and would love a break. It's our 20th next week and would love to get away for a weekend, but our son is not very responsible and we have animals to care for. Anyone had to deal with this situation? Just afraid he would forget to take out the dogs regularly and feed them as well as having people over doing who knows what and I would never know except if they damaged something or he left a mess. We really need to get away.
My curfew was always my grade level, 9pm=9th grade, etc. unless I was at an activity supervised by an adult (ie. school play rehearsal, etc.).
When I turned 18 I started paying (token) rent ($100/mo. in 1980's dollars) that didn't include 'maid' service (I had been doing my own clothes washing since I was in 7th grade and always cleaned my own room) and the curfew froze at 12am unless I worked late. I could stay out later at a fee of $5/hr. I had my own apt. 6mos. after h.s.! After I got my own apt. ($125/mo) I was rarely out after 10pm...go figure?
"...our son is not very responsible...". How did *that* happen?
Your son should be the caretaker of the animals now and from now on. You'll get one week to see if he's capable.
I'm not 18, im older and I don't have a curfew and havent had one for quite some time now.
The quiet hours for our house are 10pm to 6pm and if I'm going to be coming home during that time I better be very quiet. I work past 10 al the time so its not like I have a choice in coming home before 10 so all my mom said is that I better be very quiet coming in..
I also don't have to come home every night. Last night was the first night in two days that I've slept at my own house.
It works out for us.
I was wondering how well it was working out as your home location is Hell,lol?
Some kids are responsible enough where they don't need boundaries and other's do much better with them even when they are of legal age. Mine is the later.
I guess I am just a hard assed meanie. But if I could not trust my eighteen year old not to trash my house when I went away or to feed the pets, he would be asked to find alternate living arrangements. But then, I cannot imagine how you get to be 18 and still not manage to feed the pets when Mom and Dad go away.
He is extremely forgetful, period. Leaves his keys, wallet, shoes at friends homes. Has trouble focusing. Has a job, goes to school, but he just is forgetful as part of his make up.
My curfew was always my grade level, 9pm=9th grade, etc. unless I was at an activity supervised by an adult (ie. school play rehearsal, etc.).
When I turned 18 I started paying (token) rent ($100/mo. in 1980's dollars) that didn't include 'maid' service (I had been doing my own clothes washing since I was in 7th grade and always cleaned my own room) and the curfew froze at 12am unless I worked late. I could stay out later at a fee of $5/hr. I had my own apt. 6mos. after h.s.! After I got my own apt. ($125/mo) I was rarely out after 10pm...go figure?
"...our son is not very responsible...". How did *that* happen?
Your son should be the caretaker of the animals now and from now on. You'll get one week to see if he's capable.
*That* happened after giving him responsibilites and not following through, like keep the dogs crated when you leave the house, feed your lizard, etc. The lizard would be dead if I didn't remind him to feed him and I just can't let the thing die to prove a point. The other night he left my car unlocked and left the key in the front door. That is how forgetful he is or maybe it's his Adhd? Either way, the maturity level does not match his age but he is slowly getting there.
He goes to college and has a job. And he has friends he will probably invite over for a party. But he can't remember to feed the dogs or keep track of his keys.
The problem here isn't imposing a curfew. Or forgetfulness. It's determining why he can party and work and go to school but not be responsible enough to keep the family pets alive.
I WANT you to have that week-end off. But if you get to the bottom of the real problem you won't have to wonder about curfew and you'll be able to leave him by himself.
(If he's just the absent minded professor call him while you are gone and say, "Feed the animals NOW." Then stay on the phone while he does it.)
For those that are parent's of an 18 year old still living at home, what do you think their curfew should be during the week when going to college and Friday and Sat nights?
Also, my husband and myself have not been away alone together for years and would love a break. It's our 20th next week and would love to get away for a weekend, but our son is not very responsible and we have animals to care for. Anyone had to deal with this situation? Just afraid he would forget to take out the dogs regularly and feed them as well as having people over doing who knows what and I would never know except if they damaged something or he left a mess. We really need to get away.
In general I am infavour of parents being in control and strict with their kids. I would say for curfew, 11pm during the week and maybe 1am on fri and sat night but I would be flexible depending on how much partying was going on.
Baybe though with your kid, you need to give them an opportunity to be responsible. Go away for 3 days. Make sure he knows he is responsible and what his duties are but then just leave him. If he forgets well the dogs won't die in 3 days. See how he goes.
He goes to college and has a job. And he has friends he will probably invite over for a party. But he can't remember to feed the dogs or keep track of his keys.
The problem here isn't imposing a curfew. Or forgetfulness. It's determining why he can party and work and go to school but not be responsible enough to keep the family pets alive.
I WANT you to have that week-end off. But if you get to the bottom of the real problem you won't have to wonder about curfew and you'll be able to leave him by himself.
(If he's just the absent minded professor call him while you are gone and say, "Feed the animals NOW." Then stay on the phone while he does it.)
Yep, he is the Absent Minded Unprofessor and who wants to constantly call during your first trip away alone in years! I just don't want to worry about the other living creatures in my house while I am gone. Maybe I will hire someone to come in twice a day for peace of mind to let the dogs out, put them back in the kennel and make sure they are fed. It would be worth the $100 for peace of mind. He will hate it, but oh well.
In general I am infavour of parents being in control and strict with their kids. I would say for curfew, 11pm during the week and maybe 1am on fri and sat night but I would be flexible depending on how much partying was going on.
Baybe though with your kid, you need to give them an opportunity to be responsible. Go away for 3 days. Make sure he knows he is responsible and what his duties are but then just leave him. If he forgets well the dogs won't die in 3 days. See how he goes.
Seriously? They won't die in three days? Would you like to come home to a house full of poop and pee because he forgot to let them out enough and to crate them? One of my dog's is elderly and needs help sometimes getting down two flights of stairs. Seriously, I don't think most dog lovers would go along with your philosophy.
Yep, he is the Absent Minded Unprofessor and who wants to constantly call during your first trip away alone in years! I just don't want to worry about the other living creatures in my house while I am gone. Maybe I will hire someone to come in twice a day for peace of mind to let the dogs out, put them back in the kennel and make sure they are fed. It would be worth the $100 for peace of mind. He will hate it, but oh well.
If 100 bucks will buy you peace of mind and a week-end away, I vote Yes. Have a great time!
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
