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I find it interesting that the OP views the comments in this thread as being anti-cosmetic surgery. I haven't seen much of that, but what I have seen are posts asking why someone who loves themselves would commit to having multiple procedures done. I'm pro-cosmetic surgery and treatments. I've had it in the past, and I hope to have a few procedures in the future. I'm presently a 40E and I would like to have my breasts reduced; in the past, I have had medical microdermabrasion and I'll probably do some laser treatment to target acne scars. So, I understand the desire to tweak things that you think can be improved; but, I think the fact that you have become totally involved in this quest is what makes these procedures dramatic. You've made these tweaks into an obsession, and that is what makes it unnatural - not the actual surgeries themselves. I don't find fault in anyone choosing to enhance their appearance, but what I am struggling to understand is why you would wish to?
If you are a model or in the adult industry, I can understand why bigger boobs would appeal to you. It isn't so much a cosmetic thing, but more of an investment into your career. Corporate execs improve their resumes with certs and degrees, and those who make their money on their looks enhance their portfolio with cosmetic procedures. Liposuction - I get it. We only see your pics from the breasts up; for all that we know, you may have a vastly disproportionate lower half (really big hips or extra weight in the abdomen area) so again, a procedure I understand.
As for the nose and jaw, I personally don't see why you need these modified. You say that you are intent on having these surgeries, but I think there is probably some seed in your mind that is telling you that you are having these surgeries for the wrong reason. Yes, you can love yourself and still find it imperfect; but, in this quest to obtain perfection, you risk losing yourself and the love that you presently have for yourself. These surgeries aren't guaranteed to give you the results you are expecting. You may come away from them not liking the result. I understand the planning aspect; I do it too. I can spend months looking for a new apartment (even before my lease is up) and surf websites looking for decorating tips, furniture, and cookware. But, then the time comes and I don't follow through with anything that I had previously thought that I had wanted.
I'm wondering if you've done anything to focus on inner beauty? Looks are shallow, fleeting and gone in a flash. I hope you don't turn into one of these crazy old ladies trying to look 20 for the rest of your life. Some people just have an inner light that makes them beautiful at any age. I hope you find that as well.
That's like impossible for me. The first thing I do when I wake up is check my multiple plastic surgery forums. Then I check my email which gives me updates on plastic surgery news. When I youtube I check out plastic surgery network. I know this is temporary because I have an obssessive personality and have been temporarily obsessed with many, many, many other things, I just know I need to get round 2 out of the way to get back to my normal life.
OK, thanks for the frank info. This is exactly what it sounded like to me from the start--a temporary obsessive thing. (It takes one to know one--I avoid activities that can trigger the obsessive thing.) Still, I don't think you need these procedures. How about finding something else to obsess about that doesn't involve people slicing into you, and anesthesia (always risky)?
Did this interest come up in part because of a new job, or new income? Is this partly about, "I can afford it now, so I'm going to splurge"? I thought I saw a hint of that in one of your posts. There are better ways to use your money. Take a cruise and get the on-board massages and facials, or something. Much healthier and relaxing, plus scenic, too! And there are single guys on board, needless to say... Just an idea. Take care.
I read through your initial post, and seriously something eerily reminds me of one of my best friends In BK (you have a similar writing style as well).
Still, I don't think you need these procedures. How about finding something else to obsess about that doesn't involve people slicing into you, and anesthesia (always risky)?
Going under anesthesia is less risky than being in a motor vehicle. It's not something I'm doing flippantly, though I'm aware that I won't always be this obsessed. I have a strong sense for what will please me. I know this will give me a lot more gratification than buying clothes, handbags, shoes, or anything else.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth
Did this interest come up in part because of a new job, or new income? Is this partly about, "I can afford it now, so I'm going to splurge"? I thought I saw a hint of that in one of your posts.
Yeah, that's really a lot of it to be frank. I'm a single person with not a lot of obligations other than myself and no credit card debt, so when I saw money begin to accrue in my bank account I thought I'd fulfill dreams that I always had. I went to a plastic surgeon for a consult in 2010 but didn't have the money and it was like a kick in the stomach I felt so defeated.
OP, you are beautiful already but do whatever makes you happy. Your interest in dating and sex will return to you when you accomplish your cosmetic procedure goals.
OP, you are beautiful already but do whatever makes you happy. Your interest in dating and sex will return to you when you accomplish your cosmetic procedure goals.
Yeah, OP, why mess with success? That's what we're trying to figure out.
I feel very strongly that confidence in your looks is very over valued in society. I feel that it is drilled into people's heads that they should be content with every single part of their faces and bodies or they are somewhat flawed and need to sit in a psychiatrist's chair. Self esteem is like the holy grail in today's society. You'd rather be called ugly than have it said your self esteem isn't up to par. I wholeheartedly reject that. Studies show that people with "average" self esteem over estimate their level of attractiveness AND their skill set to others. This is what's valued in society, thinking that you're better than others without any grounds to base it on y.
I agree with Chessie Mom that you don't get what self-esteem is. It certainly has nothing to do with thinking you're more attractive or skilled than you are. It is perfectly possible for a person to have perfectly healthy self-esteem and to be fully aware that she doesn't look that great. Such a person might consider her appearance a tactical disadvantage and might even take steps to fix it, but probably wouldn't become obsessed about it.
I have never had a therapist try to convince me that I was great-looking or highly skilled or otherwise try to cultivate an idealized self-image in me. Therapists, good ones, anyway, help you address thought and behavior patterns that are unhelpful. They don't blow smoke to make you feel better temporarily. In light of your commitment to investing in your mental development, you might try it.
Many people have told you that there is nothing wrong with your appearance, but you are convinced that your perceptions of yourself are more accurate because you are "more real with yourself" than others are with you. That, plus the checking of multiple forums per day regarding the multiple surgeries you have planned, plus the plan to expand a chest that is currently so large that it garners attention, is really concerning.
I'm wondering if you've done anything to focus on inner beauty? Looks are shallow, fleeting and gone in a flash. I hope you don't turn into one of these crazy old ladies trying to look 20 for the rest of your life. Some people just have an inner light that makes them beautiful at any age. I hope you find that as well.
Reconstructive surgery is okay....to take the skin on your face and have it pulled back light an overly tight sausage casing is goofy...Look at Joan Rivers--she thinks she looks great...she looks like a monster...also you can be cut and tucked and the flesh on your neck will continue to sag- Gravity and time will pull us all down...ans sag us right into the grave- no avoiding that.
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