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Disclaimers: LONG POST AHEAD DO NOT READ IT AND THEN COMPLAIN HOW LONG IT IS. THIS POST IS ONLY MY OPINION, TAKE IT AS SUCH, THANKS. I AM NOT TROLLING OR LOOKING FOR A FIGHT. I truly only want to make things better!
Hi, I am new to this forum. I just moved from Abq to Austin (LOVIN' IT!).
I have read over a lot of the threads in the abq forum. I am curious why the 505 is so defensive when someone doesn't like their city or state? Why not just let it be? As long as they are not personally attacking or using cuss words, etc (no attacking your city/state is not a personal attack). Anyone around here ever heard the saying, "me thinks thou doth protest too much"?
Most of you who post regularly want to "sell" NM as being a friendly live and let live place. So, why do you tear apart and attack anyone who has a differing view. You say they post without using facts. Well, why not give them a chance to post up those "facts" after you ask instead of just going on a rampage? It seems like some people are just giving their opinion, which doesn't require any technical data. If, you truly represent NM then it is my opinion that you are not accomplishing your goal of selling it as a great place.
Sure, some people may not be put off by the tone of the NM/Abq forum but they are the people who post. Think about all the people who may not post. They may just read the forum and be put off by the whole tone.
When researching an area to move or visit a lot goes into it. A person may have more than one city in mind and they need to narrow it down. They may only be able to visit a couple of cities they are considering. They may scratch NM off their list when they see some of the outrageous posts. These are posts by people claiming to love it here!
I am not here to judge NM. I spent a lot of years there and it was miserable for me. I left and I am much, much happier. It took leaving to see why some might like it there. We are not all the same and what makes me miserable may make others happy. I love the green, humidity, the huge variety of things to do in the Austin area. Others prefer the dry dusty wild west feel of NM. To each his own I am just trying to help you all by getting you to see that you may be making yourselves along with NM look bad. Unless your goal is secretly to scare people away in an attempt to keep the population down in NM/Abq.
Best of luck to each of you!
Last edited by thirdtimesacharm; 04-02-2008 at 10:21 AM..
Reason: spelling
I think that what you may have overlooked is the fact that occasionally someone will post a remark that is filled with inflamatory statements, when the person had only "passed through" several years earlier, or had lived there for a short while and moved away. The defensive response by the people who live there and love it there is an appropriate response to that type of posting.
Different posts illicit different responses.
Your post is not inflamatory, so you're likely to get a response that is much more alligned with the attitude of most Albuquerquens that I've met - a more relaxed and laid back response.
My experience in Austin lead me to really NOT like it there at all, but I surely would not go to the Austin forum to post the specific things that I didn't like about Austin (unless I was living there) - and I definitely wouldn't do it using inflamatory words or an inflamatory tone, like some people do when they post on the ABQ thread (and I'm sure they do on the Austin thread). Doing that is just asking for this type of response.
My question is - instead of asking the people who love living in this city to stop defending their city and "let it be" , why don't you ask the people who never lived in the city, or no longer live in the city and didn't like ABQ to "let it be" and not post horrible postings on the forum?
If they posted a non-inflamatory posting (like you did here), than the response would be very different INMHO.
You also state that this doesn't reflect very well on ABQ, and maybe it does, maybe it doesn't. My personal belief is that if I see that there are people in a city who really care about that city and are animate about defending that city in these forums, something is right about that and that city has loyal and passionate citizens, and frankly that's a city that I would want to live in.
Also, instead of asking the ABQ posters how their responses reflect on ABQ, maybe you might want to ask yourself how your posting on the ABQ forum about people of ABQ's responses to inflamatory statements (with an undertone of how you love Austin), reflects on Austin.
Casden,
I understand what you are saying but I am talking about people posting things about crime, education, etc.. A statement being "flat out inflamatory" is the opinion of the person who is replying. The poster may not feel they are saying anything that may cause a huge fight. Most of the people who post these so called "imflamatory" posts DO live in ABQ. or NM.
Also, I feel that if someone makes a post that offends others the people responding should be mature about it. Instead of getting very upset, it just doesn't look good.
In the Austin forum if someone says something upsetting the other posters don't get mad and lash out. Just an observation.
Well in my humble opinion, and from my experience of the people in Albuquerque (and Austin), the people in ABQ are very friendly and wonderful people, but they do not hesitate to tell you if something is bothering them.
ABQen's will NOT seem overly friendly and be extremely nice to you and then talk about you behind your back because they don't want to hurt your feelings.
They will be friendly to you, but tell you upfront what they think and that to me is refreshing. It's not the "Southern style" of friendly and nice, but the Southwestern style "as a matter of fact" type of nice.
This is why I think that you will see these types of responses on the ABQ forum, and not on the Austin forum. This is just my opinion - take it as you will.
Some people do get offensive when the crime talk is brought up, but I think everyone has their own opinions,some have been victims of crime and have seen alot growing up and others have not seen any or been a victim,I think this is the big thing on the forum.
I have spent a lot of time on city-data when I was researching where I wanted to move. In nearly all of the forums I looked at I never saw anything even close to the tones used in the Abq/NM forum. The only forum similar was Reno.
On the positive side, I am sure that since NM is so unique the forum is likely to be unique also.
I am not saying the attitudes on here are wrong. I am just saying they could put people off of NM. But who cares, if people really are the type to like NM they probably won't mind the tone of the forum.
Have a nice day, and I don't mean it to be sarcastic, I really mean it.
Personally, I find the Florida forums - all of them, including my very wonderful and very nice (seriously!) former city of Tampa - to be much more negative and flaming than the ABQ & NM forums could dream of being. But that's what's neat about this site - you DO get a feel of the city from the posters on the various forums. I liked the fact that the NM and ABQ posters were proud of their cities and their state, and take major pains here to show it. After living in several states where the residents don't really give a damn for anything outside their little personal sphere (including TX, sorry!), the NM and ABQ forums were a nice change.
Try making some of the comments made here on the Florida forums about Florida - they'll flame you in a heartbeat.
funkymonkey said, "I'm sure if someone were to flame you for making this post, you might get a bit defensive."
Actually, I wouldn't because I have found this doesn't work for me. It's like fanning the flames. I also feel confident in what I believe and have no need to defend it. If others have a different view that's okay. We are all different and I have no need to convince others that my way is the right way.
"WHat's wrong with getting defensive?"
I can only say that it doesn't work for me. If it works for you that's great. But are you sure that it works for you? I would like to ask you what does your defensiveness accomplish?
That is my reason for posting this thread in the first place. I just felt that quite a few of the posts that have been put up were not in line with what the poster wanted people to think about NM.
I think Casden explained it well, "They will be friendly to you, but tell you upfront what they think and that to me is refreshing. It's not the "Southern style" of friendly and nice, but the Southwestern style "as a matter of fact" type of nice."
Maybe this is what I see in this forum and in NM. I lived there a long time and never really understood the culture. I may not agree with it but I would like to understand it. I will be visiting family alot and would like to make my trip enjoyable.
I do prefer the Southern style of nice better. It may annoy others. I like it because If I walk down the street I may see a bunch of people that I never see again. I would prefer them to smile and be friendly. This helps to make my day more pleasant. If they then turn around and tell their friend, "wow, that girl got hit with the ugly stick" what difference will that make to me. I think they are friendly. I will never know they felt different. If I have a friend and they talk behind my back that is different. I am not one to have a ton of friends. I can find a few friends that are genuine anywhere in the world. Everyday, though, I have to walk down the street and see people. I would rather that they were just nice and didn't tell me what they think.
This is probably the main reason I didn't enjoy NM. I felt that, sure, I may meet a few people who really like me but everyday people are telling me what they think. People I have never met. It just got old to me.
For those who like this behavior I have no desire to change them. I just want to understand the culture of NM a little better.
Last edited by thirdtimesacharm; 04-03-2008 at 09:20 AM..
Reason: spelling, again!
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I am just trying to help you all by getting you to see that you may be making yourselves along with NM look bad. Unless your goal is secretly to scare people away in an attempt to keep the population down in NM/Abq.
