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Being gay is a choice. Being heterosexual is a choice. Everyone has desires that they need/want to fulfill. It's evident that going to the Bible will not sell many people on the fact that God does not approve of homosexuality.
Let me ask you a question. How do you feel about youself when you're alone? Do you want to be gay? Do you enjoy being gay? Not for social or society reasons, but personally.
When I was with guys, I made the choice to spend the night. I chose to continue in that lifestyle because I enjoyed the feeling.
I don't want to get personal or offend in any way but I have to ask a question, feel free not to answer. How do you feel now? Isn't it stressful to surpress your feelings all the time? Are you actually attracted to the opposite sex (your spouse I assume) and have no problems with that? Do you think you can do it forever?
I only ask because I have a sister and a dear friend who are gay. Both of these people tried to live conventional heterosexual lives. Both fell deep into depression and somatic health problems from the stress of trying to live a life that didn't suit them. So I wonder if you answer that you are ok with your choice if there could be "degrees of gay" (this is a really poor way to phrase this, but I'm at a loss for words). What I mean by that is like someone who has say Downs Syndrome (a genetic defect) and one child is profoundly affected with every health and cognitive problem identified with the syndrome and then another child, still with Down's Syndrome, has a mild manisfestation with average IQ and minimal health sequela. Do you think that is a possiblility that some people can manage to surpress their desires better because they aren't as strong in the first place?
Again feel free to delete this if it's too personal...but I am innately curious and don't know of anyone else that has successfully done what you are doing.
I've been reading a lot of posts today and decided to start this thread because of comments that I've read. By no means am I gay, nor Christian but I am curious where in the Bible does it say that being gay is wrong?
Also, if Christ died for our sins and being gay is a sin, then why couldn't have Christ died for gays' sins as well? We commit sins every day. Some worse than others. Why is it that a murderer who is truly sorry for his sin can be forgiven yet a gay person is constantly judged by Christians?
The only person who should judge is God, right? He is ultimately the one who decides whether we go to heaven or hell so why is it that at the "church level" gays are judged and "kicked out" of their religion?
You (and others here) may find this site interesting. It's by a gay reverend/apologetic who goes over what it does (and doesn't) say in the Bible regarding same-sex issues.
http://www.soulforce.org/article/homosexuality-bible-gay-christian (broken link)
I don't want to get personal or offend in any way but I have to ask a question, feel free not to answer. How do you feel now? Isn't it stressful to surpress your feelings all the time? Are you actually attracted to the opposite sex (your spouse I assume) and have no problems with that? Do you think you can do it forever?
I only ask because I have a sister and a dear friend who are gay. Both of these people tried to live conventional heterosexual lives. Both fell deep into depression and somatic health problems from the stress of trying to live a life that didn't suit them. So I wonder if you answer that you are ok with your choice if there could be "degrees of gay" (this is a really poor way to phrase this, but I'm at a loss for words). What I mean by that is like someone who has say Downs Syndrome (a genetic defect) and one child is profoundly affected with every health and cognitive problem identified with the syndrome and then another child, still with Down's Syndrome, has a mild manisfestation with average IQ and minimal health sequela. Do you think that is a possiblility that some people can manage to surpress their desires better because they aren't as strong in the first place?
Again feel free to delete this if it's too personal...but I am innately curious and don't know of anyone else that has successfully done what you are doing.
Oh no I would not delete your post just because you asked such a personal question. Becoming a moderator has not changed who I am on this forum. I'll still be as open as before, and I made sure I could still be the Hoosier_guy everyone has come to know before even accepting this position.
Now to answer your question. Yes I am attracted to the opposite sex. Most definitely.
Is it stressful?
yeah, it can be. But that is where prayer comes into play. How I personally deal with these issues is that I pray and talk to God and work through them. It's not a daily thing, but some days are tougher than others.
Speaking only for myself here, I am willing to go through this because my relationship with Christ is more important than fulfilling what I want in my flesh. I know that many people may find that odd, freakish or just plain crazy. But God is the most important aspect of my life.
degrees of gay
yeah I really do believe that statement. I personally think that is why some people choose to be bi-sexual. They enjoy sex from both sides, and IMO that is a degree of being gay.
My wife
When we were dating I shared with her who I had been sexually. I never asked her to accept what I did, or who I had been. But to accept me for who I am today.
She is an amazing woman with a lot of love, patience and sweetness. I'm a very blessed guy to have a woman like her as my best friend and wife. And even moreso now as I am in the beginning stages of starting put together speaking engagements at church youth groups to talk to kids about homosexuality, what it's like, how to act toward gay people (love them! will be my statement) and to know that God loves them!
I am always open to answering questions! It takes way too much to offend me. If you or anyone ever wants to share something personal, have a question or whatever, you can always pm me!
Hoosier_guy - You are lucky to have your wife! I think it's great you have found someone so loving and understanding.
Thank you! Yes I so agree. I met her when I was 30 and married when I was 31. She was so worth the wait! I love her more now than the day I married her.
Hoosier_guy - Thank you for answering, it's amazing that you do this. I have to say that your faith is probably why you can do it. My sister is not very spiritual, I don't think she identifys with any faith at the moment, but I do know she dropped Catholic fast and then tried Buddism. The other friend is Jewish, and once his family basically disowned him he turned from that as well. I hope it continues to work out for you. I would have to say that you are an original and one determined man!
Good point, I don't hate, shun or cast out anyone who is gay, but I do not condone their behavior. If being gay was not a choice God would never have said to stay away from it. If a person could be born gay the Bible, God's Word would not say it was wrong.
If we can't love the person who commits sin, then we are judging that person. I really don't know if a person is born gay, or chooses to become gay. However, if we are born straight, but with an overactive libido, God still expects us to keep it in check. We can't chase after every skirt we see, just because "we were born that way." I have a step son who is gay. I love him dearly, but he knows that I do not condone that part of his life. It is wrong because God's word says it's wrong. Wherever our desires take us that is contrary to what God says, that is when we have to do whatever is necessary ie; fast & pray, stay in the word, etc. until that temptation is past. 1st Corinthians 10:13 says that "there has no temptation taken you but such as is common to man, but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted above that you are able, but will with the temptation, also make a way of escape that you may be able to bear it." We can't always control our desires, we can only control the way we react to them. I have known Gays who have become christians, and they have stopped practicing that lifestyle. I have talked to many who tell me that sometimes the desire is nearly overwhelming, but that's where prayer comes in, and taking God at His word, believe that he will help them to escape that temptation. But that works for EVERY sin, because sin is not categorized. If you're guilty of one, you're guilty of all. Just because SIN IS SIN. Thank God for forgiveness through the blood of his son, Jesus Christ.
we can and do love them but we still point out the sin that is in their lives and destroying them. If a loved one of mine was a drug addict or alcoholic, I would love them no less but hate the behavior that they are addicted to. So goes the sin of adultery, fornication, or homosexuality
actually i have lived in many states that have blue laws against the sale of alcohol, and dry counties. I am also against all drugs, but I am not against gay people loving others as I love gay people. But that doesnt negate the sin, anymore than it would negate the sin if I cheated on my taxes or my wife, or murdered someone, its still sin
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