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What do you do? Right now I am just at that point. Unemployed for months, depressed over this, can't very well do retail therapy to get over it, bad news everywhere I look....bored to tears. Thinking (knowing) I made a huge mistake by moving to another city where there is nothing to do, leaving a good job behind to change careers and now regretting it...no significant other to lean on...blah, blah, blah.
I know I'm not alone in this forum. I know there are good days and bad days, but what do you do when it seems like the "good old days" are permanently gone and everything just looks bleak? I guess a person doesn't have much choice but to keep on keeping on, but what do you do to pull yourself out of a very bad day? I guess I could just jump in and send out some resumes, but that is depressing too...
I'm probably perpetually depressed but I mask it by doing things. I cleaned my son's room today, cleaned the bathroom top to bottom and spent time just thinking about how nothing seems to work out lately. I also seem to be doing a lot of daydreaming, which is good for my writing (I am back writing nearly every day) but I can't live inside my head.
My husband hates working nights and not only must I deal with my own unemployment, I get told by him how he hates his hours and how 'He is working for nothing' since the money he makes is all we have. (and it is not enough). So cue more guilt.
I wish I had advice for you but if I hear one more damn Pollyanna say to me "Just keep going and never stop" I will hurl something through my computer screen. When you are UNEMPLOYED for a long time it is not time to have a pity party but hell, people with jobs just do not know what it is like, especially for us over 40.
I'm probably perpetually depressed but I mask it by doing things. I cleaned my son's room today, cleaned the bathroom top to bottom and spent time just thinking about how nothing seems to work out lately. I also seem to be doing a lot of daydreaming, which is good for my writing (I am back writing nearly every day) but I can't live inside my head.
My husband hates working nights and not only must I deal with my own unemployment, I get told by him how he hates his hours and how 'He is working for nothing' since the money he makes is all we have. (and it is not enough). So cue more guilt.
I wish I had advice for you but if I hear one more damn Pollyanna say to me "Just keep going and never stop" I will hurl something through my computer screen. When you are UNEMPLOYED for a long time it is not time to have a pity party but hell, people with jobs just do not know what it is like, especially for us over 40.
Amen, Gypsysoul, and I have years on you (not that it matters, as it seems once over 40 everyone gets lumped in together. I'm a member of the "leaving dates of graduations" club off my resume and I imagine a good many are). At least you can be productive with cleaning, which his very good. I am sorry your husband gives you a hard time. That cannot help at all. But, it is good you have a family to think about. I feel like a giant loser without a husband/children.
Yeah, I am not a member of the Pollyanna club myself. I guess I have to come to terms with what is and just find a way to get through each day. This morning I told myself - self, clean the garage. There is much to clean. The day will be over and then maybe tomorrrow will look different.
Also, I've stopped volunteering which bums me out. I just don't want to be out and about around a lot of germs with all of the crap going around. So I just stay inside this house and will until I can get that swine flu shot. Just one more thing to think about. The upside to being unemployed right now (and there IS an upside) is that I'm not around a bunch of sick people. Every cloud has a silver lining, eh?
Oh, and what would we do without City Data? As bad as things are, at least we can reach out to each other for support via this forum.
Do you have a LinkedIn account? If not, set up one and invest some time in tweaking it. It takes a lot of time to do a good job with it. Then use the Search people function to locate some of your ex-colleagues or friends and invite them to your connection. Get recommended by people who truly appreciated your work and ramp up the thumbs up sign on your profile. I wouldn't put all my eggs in that basket but it is a productive way to spend your time and channel your energies and frustration, plus it's another place where you could look up updates. Join Groups. There are job postings exclusive to groups (for ex. I joined the [Cityname] Professionals Group and the Action for Better Healthcare) which you would not find anywhere else.
I don't know how active you are in your local area forum here at CD but I just recently came across someone who worked for a company I'm trying my darnest to break into. She offered to submit my resume as an employee referral, and on top of that, she took the initiative of showing my resume to her boss for her boss to mull it over. Now granted that this was a unique situation, you may find some similar person in your area. If nothing else, this person has become my friend. We are planning a meetup because I wanted to buy her lunch for her troubles.
You never know who you'll meet in City Data.
ETA: Don't second guess your decision to quit. You're there now...don't look back and just keep looking forward.
Seven months unemployed and not sure which way to turn anymore,seemingly endless e-mailed,faxed,mailed resumes and applications, going to businesses, following up with networking leads,temp agencies,ad infinitum,ad nauseum...Truly becoming at wits end as to what to do anymore,and starting to get that feeling like I will never work again.
Do you have a LinkedIn account? If not, set up one and invest some time in tweaking it. It takes a lot of time to do a good job with it. Then use the Search people function to locate some of your ex-colleagues or friends and invite them to your connection. Get recommended by people who truly appreciated your work and ramp up the thumbs up sign on your profile. I wouldn't put all my eggs in that basket but it is a productive way to spend your time and channel your energies and frustration, plus it's another place where you could look up updates. Join Groups. There are job postings exclusive to groups (for ex. I joined the [Cityname] Professionals Group and the Action for Better Healthcare) which you would not find anywhere else.
I don't know how active you are in your local area forum here at CD but I just recently came across someone who worked for a company I'm trying my darnest to break into. She offered to submit my resume as an employee referral, and on top of that, she took the initiative of showing my resume to her boss for her boss to mull it over. Now granted that this was a unique situation, you may find some similar person in your area. If nothing else, this person has become my friend. We are planning a meetup because I wanted to buy her lunch for her troubles.
You never know who you'll meet in City Data.
ETA: Don't second guess your decision to quit. You're there now...don't look back and just keep looking forward.
You know something, bibit? I don't even know how to do any of this. I should look for a class so I can get up to speed on all of this social media stuff. I am embarrassed to admit this, but I don't even know how to text a message! I only recently bought a DVD and did figure out how to hook that up to my TV.
Anyway, all great ideas that you have. I'm not a big networker, but every other Tuesday there is a local networking group that I'll need to start attending. Can't hurt. They have something here called Boomerz and I need to get more involved in that organization as well. There are all sorts of meetups to get out of the house (not necessarily related to work but just to meet new people) but then they cost money and when one is unemployed spending money isn't a good idea.
I am so glad that I came home to read this! Earlier this afternoon I was posting on another thread and started thinking about the jobs I had in the past. I was upset from reliving memory lane a bit anyway, had to make a mad dash to the bank for something I couldn't find (and I'm usually very organized) and encountered THE TELLER. We all know her . . . the one who looks at everyone with great disdain when you ask for a balance or what time a deposit will credit . . . sneering and smug because she has a job and you don't. As I had an encounter with her this summer about a missing transfer, I thought, "oh, no. Not today." The rest of the tellers are friendly, so I turned away from the woman and stared out the window while I waited. I was determined that I wasn't dealing with her. Anyway, I escaped her by a few seconds and stopped at the gas station on the way home. The owner is very sweet and always asks if I have found a job. "No," I reply, wondering if I'm ever going to have a decent position again. "Have you been on an interview?"she asks. I realize that I actually have a dress on and say, "no, I've been to the dentist earlier. My jeans looked too awful to wear." (We've had a sudden cold snap here -- at least, it's cold for the Southeast). I came home, looked in the mirror and thought about how terrible my hair looked. Then I read this and it cheered me up a little. Anyway . . . Gypsy, if you don't mind me asking, what type of writing are you doing? Is it a project intended for the future or some current freelance? I've looked at Examiner and some of the other things on line and haven't been too motivated by them. Movin' on, I'm glad to hear there's someone else bummed out by volunteering. I am right there with you. I've already cut back some because of the clothes and lunches involved with mine. Also, if I have to look at a few of the silly women on certain days I know that I will scream! Yesterday I spent all afternoon hunting a mystery shop that might actually leave a few dollars after I bought gas. Nada! All of the shops from the sights I'm signed up with and cleared for paid about $8.00. Anyway, if I find any good "time killers", little money makers, whatever, I'll post them. It is s - o - o -o good to have everyone one to talk to on these forums. I'm 53, and my friends who are my age or a little older have apparently thrown in the towel. One said she is never working again. I don't have that choice -- and if I did, I would still want to work. (Unless I won a tremendously large lottery and there's little or no chance of that! LOL).Meanwhile, I'll pet my precious kitty, Baby, a little. She has a much better attitude than I do right now.
I am so glad that I came home to read this! Earlier this afternoon I was posting on another thread and started thinking about the jobs I had in the past. I was upset from reliving memory lane a bit anyway, had to make a mad dash to the bank for something I couldn't find (and I'm usually very organized) and encountered THE TELLER. We all know her . . . the one who looks at everyone with great disdain when you ask for a balance or what time a deposit will credit . . . sneering and smug because she has a job and you don't. As I had an encounter with her this summer about a missing transfer, I thought, "oh, no. Not today." The rest of the tellers are friendly, so I turned away from the woman and stared out the window while I waited. I was determined that I wasn't dealing with her. Anyway, I escaped her by a few seconds and stopped at the gas station on the way home. The owner is very sweet and always asks if I have found a job. "No," I reply, wondering if I'm ever going to have a decent position again. "Have you been on an interview?"she asks. I realize that I actually have a dress on and say, "no, I've been to the dentist earlier. My jeans looked too awful to wear." (We've had a sudden cold snap here -- at least, it's cold for the Southeast). I came home, looked in the mirror and thought about how terrible my hair looked. Then I read this and it cheered me up a little. Anyway . . . Gypsy, if you don't mind me asking, what type of writing are you doing? Is it a project intended for the future or some current freelance? I've looked at Examiner and some of the other things on line and haven't been too motivated by them. Movin' on, I'm glad to hear there's someone else bummed out by volunteering. I am right there with you. I've already cut back some because of the clothes and lunches involved with mine. Also, if I have to look at a few of the silly women on certain days I know that I will scream! Yesterday I spent all afternoon hunting a mystery shop that might actually leave a few dollars after I bought gas. Nada! All of the shops from the sights I'm signed up with and cleared for paid about $8.00. Anyway, if I find any good "time killers", little money makers, whatever, I'll post them. It is s - o - o -o good to have everyone one to talk to on these forums. I'm 53, and my friends who are my age or a little older have apparently thrown in the towel. One said she is never working again. I don't have that choice -- and if I did, I would still want to work. (Unless I won a tremendously large lottery and there's little or no chance of that! LOL).Meanwhile, I'll pet my precious kitty, Baby, a little. She has a much better attitude than I do right now.
Antiques, happy if this helps! But I am curious - how can your friends throw in the towel? Are they married and so they don't have to work? I wish I had the luxury of even thinking throwing in the towel is an option. I'm throwing it in for today as I am just too down to do anything. I just want to go to sleep tonight and wake up and maybe tomorrow will look different. Meanwhile, I do have to count my blessings (I guess).
Yeah, so much for snooty bank tellers, hah? There but for the grace of God go they...anyone right now with a job should sure not be smug. Their job could be next...
I have two baby doll Shih Tzus (Ruby and Pearl) and a cat named Gwenny. Think I'll go give the fur babies a hug too.
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