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Is being cold/straight forward considered rude as "M" claims it to be???
I know we know what rude means, but I looked it up in the dictionary & it says:
1. offensively impolite or ill-mannered.
2. having a startling abruptness.
I wouldn't say rude. I wouldn't say what you said is either #1 nor 2, but it borders abruptness. It's not my style of talking/messaging at the workplace. I'm warmer than that (while staying professional...no more, no less).
No, not rude, but some people are sensitive. You may have also said it in a rude tone, but still...
How's this for rude?
M asks you for the spreadsheet list.
You say ... 'Don't you know how busy I am? I have like 20 things going on. Why don't you go to the server and create the list yourself?'
... AND in a rude tone.
There's a lot of people who talk like that. If somebody talked to me in that way, I would say something, but as long as they apologized later ... whatever it's fine. I'm really laidback though. Not all people are.
You deal...
I don't even have to tell you some of the stuff people above me have said to me over the years. Makes your comment to your co-worker look like a sympathy card.
Does a list even need to be created? Can’t you just go into the relevant folder, sort by modified date, and then send a snip of the relevant folders in an email? It seems like that would take 2-3 minutes max and the OP could also provide the file name where the person can find the data. I do this a lot at my job. It is really not that hard or time consuming to do so.
It seems like employee appreciates this information as it lets her know what is done each day. Sometimes when a thing becomes a routine, people become accustomed to it. I don’t think there is anything wrong with that. I also think that the extraneous stuff about people having things that pop up during the day is not relevant.
How do you expect us to have a real discussion if you are going to introduce logic, your useful experience and a easily workable solution?
It's a little cold to me. I would have worded it, "I'll try to see what I can do later, I'm just so swamped, but in the meantime, if you want to go ahead to the company shared server, look for the “Uploaded folder”, you'll see it."
You may even want to throw in after that, "at the rate of my workload, I'm sure you'll find it quicker than I will! "
But, if you don't care about appearing a little cold & just want to say it straight forward, say it exactly like you did, which you in fact did.
The OP didn't do or say anything wrong. You can re-word the dialogue all you wish, but if someone is having a bad day and other things going on in their personal life, it won't matter at all. There is being professional and reasonable, and there is simply being the target of someone else's frustration when you had nothing to do with it. I know your response is well meaning, but the issue here is with "M", not the OP.
Or did “M” interpret wrongly a statement as being rude?
I know you have already gotten well meaning responses, but the only mistake you are making here is that you are blaming yourself for someone else's behavior. You don't know what is going on inside of "M"'s head, perhaps there are family problems, health issue, or financial hardships they are trying to conceal or jealous of you. Some people can't deal with emotional problems in a mature manner. If you call them at the wrong time, they pick up the phone and yell at you about nothing you do wrong, but somehow it is your fault, then they might explain later on they were sorry cause they were having a bad day. Either way, M's behavior isn't professional and M's reaction is what is rude.
Again -- you didn't say or do anything wrong. "M" is the issue. It wouldn't matter if you said it in a mean-spirited and sarcastic tone, M would have responded to you differently if you did that.
Unless you are in a position that is protected by a collective bargaining agreement, or the task is something specifically regulated (such as workplace safety guidelines for say, hazardous waste containment)....your job duties are whatever someone tells you to do.
If you were assigned to handle F's tasks, and their tasks including maintaining a list--it doesn't matter why they maintained the list or whether other people used the list of other reasons--then it becomes your responsibility for this period of time.
The more you insist 'that's not my job', the more rude you sound. If you want to play the 'I've always been blunt' card, find. Just don't pretend to be perplexed when other people don't appreciate your bluntness, and tell you so.
Again I was the one that trained "F". The list that she creates and emailing it for everyone is something she has done to remind herself. It is NOT a job duty. It is a routine habit she has done to specifically for herself as a safeguard to reduce mistakes. The job duty is to handle all the incoming AP cost and manually enter every single one onto a spreadsheet to be uploaded one at a time. Which is exactly what I was doing.
I had already imported and created all the spreadsheets and made record of it in the folders which were uploaded and were not. And I did provide the file name to "M". I told her she can find it and look things up herself.
I had already send quick/short email reminders to each biller when stuff was already done throughout the past 3 days
"You can look it up yourself" may well be true, but it comes off like a callout. Confrontational. So yes, I do think you were rude. I suspect your judgments of M (you've made it clear here what you think of her and her work) also came through in your tone even if you didn't intend them to.
There are a lot of other ways you could have handled it. "I'm forwarding you a link to the folder where you can see which tasks are complete," (or whatever) is the same message, without the snark. Opening up a little and saying, "I'm swamped with doing my regular job and F's billing this week, so can I show you a different way to tracking what's complete and what's outstanding?" could probably have brought her around to your side...sounds like you're both a bit overwhelmed currently.
Don't get me wrong, M sounds like kind of a mess, and it was also rude of her to call you out on being rude.
Unless you are in a position that is protected by a collective bargaining agreement, or the task is something specifically regulated (such as workplace safety guidelines for say, hazardous waste containment)....your job duties are whatever someone tells you to do.
If you were assigned to handle F's tasks, and their tasks including maintaining a list--it doesn't matter why they maintained the list or whether other people used the list of other reasons--then it becomes your responsibility for this period of time.
The more you insist 'that's not my job', the more rude you sound. If you want to play the 'I've always been blunt' card, find. Just don't pretend to be perplexed when other people don't appreciate your bluntness, and tell you so.
I disagree.
The email business is not part of the job; F took it upon herself to do it. If the information is available for anyone to look up, pointing that person in the right direction was reasonable given that the OP is doing not only OP's job, but someone else's. If M is too lazy to look up the information, that's on M. I don't see anything rude in OP's response. So it wasn't warm or fuzzy with flowers and soft music. It was a business-like response. Simple and to the point. M probably became upset because she knew the information was there, but didn't want to take the time to actually access it and overreacted.
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