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Old 07-09-2012, 02:42 PM
 
1 posts, read 2,518 times
Reputation: 10

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HELP! LOL I'm a 29 year old woman who is kind of single w/no children. I've been in an on and off relationship for longer than I care to remember and have always wanted to move to Cali ALONE. Let me first start off by saying that I have visited the San Diego (La Mesa) area several times and each I go, I don’t want to come home (NJ)! I think my biggest hang up is taking the first step, and knowing what the first step is.

I have some family (very limited) there but I have NO intentions on moving in with them, I love them and all but UMMMMMM No thank you... lol. My current salary is a little over $40K... (I guess I can tell u guys that because hopefully we will be neighbors ). I would like a 1 bedroom that is in a neighborhood that isn’t drastically horrible, but not ritzy either (Something is telling me $40K isn’t going to get me ritzy) .

I have some sort of plan... hear me out before shooting it down lol. I want to save a decent chunk of change, somewhere around $15K-$20K over the next 2 years. Post my resume to EVERYONE in the San Diego area, then and when I'm hired, stay in an extended stay hotel until I can find an apartment... ... <--- That’s my "I'm thinking" face lol... I'm just sooooo friggin scared to actually make that move U know... I don’t have any friends there, and know almost NOTHING about the area... <--- Still thinking... BUT! I am a person who is super duper friendly and LOVES to meet people... I love to travel, and randomly walk around The City (NY) to just bump into new places. I love long walks on the beach, and did I mention I'm an Aquarius?

I have no interest in coming out there to Model (not that it would appen anyway, as fab as I am ) or sing, act etc... I'm not a party girl at all, but I will go to a poetry spot, museum, art gallerie, a concert, maybe even a lounge. But "The Scene" isnt my scene...

So I guess my questions are...

1. Can you tell me any areas (not near the beach, I'm not that girl) where rent is around....Lets say $950?
2. Do u want to be my friend when I get there?! I'm kidding... Not really... But I am... lol
3. Is ur job hiring?! Seriously...
4. In all seriousness... What should I be looking to do?
5. Any words of advice neighbor?!

Xoxo Cali Girl At Heart...
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Old 07-09-2012, 02:58 PM
 
Location: San Diego
50,264 posts, read 47,023,439 times
Reputation: 34060
What about roommates? A great way to meet people and save money.
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Old 07-09-2012, 05:14 PM
 
Location: SoCal
6,420 posts, read 11,593,857 times
Reputation: 7103
Maybe try to get a job with openings all over (Starbucks, for example). Then transfer to San Diego, and you'll already have your job.

(And don't call it "Cali"! Cali is a town in Columbia, South America.)
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Old 07-09-2012, 07:09 PM
 
Location: Where they serve real ale.
7,242 posts, read 7,905,875 times
Reputation: 3497
I'd go with renting a room in a larger house as you can easily find a room on craigslist for $500 or ~$650 for a master with private bath plus, as others have pointed out, it's a great way to meet new friends and plug yourself into a social network. If you're still intent on having your own place then $1000 a month is doable but requires more compromise.
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Old 07-09-2012, 07:14 PM
 
9,525 posts, read 30,473,115 times
Reputation: 6435
Get a roomate or three and work a job. Basic living is not hard with persistence. Don't be afraid. people are living in war torn countries and jungles and deserts and stuff. They make out as best they can and so will you. Worst case, you're heading back to mom n dad whether you like it or not, right?
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Old 07-09-2012, 07:25 PM
 
Location: East Fallowfield, PA
2,299 posts, read 4,825,934 times
Reputation: 1176
Quote:
Originally Posted by caligirlatheart View Post
HELP! LOL I'm a 29 year old woman who is kind of single w/no children. I've been in an on and off relationship for longer than I care to remember and have always wanted to move to Cali ALONE. Let me first start off by saying that I have visited the San Diego (La Mesa) area several times and each I go, I don’t want to come home (NJ)! I think my biggest hang up is taking the first step, and knowing what the first step is.

I have some family (very limited) there but I have NO intentions on moving in with them, I love them and all but UMMMMMM No thank you... lol. My current salary is a little over $40K... (I guess I can tell u guys that because hopefully we will be neighbors ). I would like a 1 bedroom that is in a neighborhood that isn’t drastically horrible, but not ritzy either (Something is telling me $40K isn’t going to get me ritzy) .

I have some sort of plan... hear me out before shooting it down lol. I want to save a decent chunk of change, somewhere around $15K-$20K over the next 2 years. Post my resume to EVERYONE in the San Diego area, then and when I'm hired, stay in an extended stay hotel until I can find an apartment... ... <--- That’s my "I'm thinking" face lol... I'm just sooooo friggin scared to actually make that move U know... I don’t have any friends there, and know almost NOTHING about the area... <--- Still thinking... BUT! I am a person who is super duper friendly and LOVES to meet people... I love to travel, and randomly walk around The City (NY) to just bump into new places. I love long walks on the beach, and did I mention I'm an Aquarius?

I have no interest in coming out there to Model (not that it would appen anyway, as fab as I am ) or sing, act etc... I'm not a party girl at all, but I will go to a poetry spot, museum, art gallerie, a concert, maybe even a lounge. But "The Scene" isnt my scene...

So I guess my questions are...

1. Can you tell me any areas (not near the beach, I'm not that girl) where rent is around....Lets say $950?
2. Do u want to be my friend when I get there?! I'm kidding... Not really... But I am... lol
3. Is ur job hiring?! Seriously...
4. In all seriousness... What should I be looking to do?
5. Any words of advice neighbor?!

Xoxo Cali Girl At Heart...

Bless your Heart! There is no way to say this without sounding mean and unsupportive, but WTH, why are you afraid? There are few things that are my pet peeves, but people who are terrified of life totally exasperate me!

If you truly want to move and you are planning to do this - sigh! - two years from now, why are you terrified?? For God Sake, make your plans, save that $15K-$20K and make the move. Sweetie, your Momma ain't on this site, get some gumption and no probably no one will want to be your friend if you are going to be this meek Millie."

As Sassberto mentioned, San Diego is not a war zone, it a very nice city with decent folks. JUST STOP IT, ALREADY!

Told you this stuff irritated me. I hope others have some sort of advice that won't have you in tears or something - I just can't tolerate it.
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Old 07-09-2012, 09:25 PM
 
Location: San Diego, CA
1,665 posts, read 2,974,663 times
Reputation: 827
You can think about it, plan for it, come up with contingency plans, and think some more about it.

But sooner or later, you've got to pull the trigger.

And a $40K job will net you enough money to live by yourself if you want. You will have to watch other expenses -- no bottle service on weekends for you. But if you think about it, $40K a year is about $3,300 a month. You want to keep your housing payments to around a third of your monthly gross, so that gives you $1,100 a month. If you're willing to cut expenses in other areas, you can go a little higher.
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Old 07-10-2012, 04:54 AM
 
371 posts, read 637,378 times
Reputation: 348
At that rent, suggesting an area would net you a lot of suggestions, and in two years that might change. Rents could go up, or an area that's okay now could be not-so-okay in two years and vice versa. You'd be better off asking when you're closer to your goal of moving out here.

As for being scared (and this is kind of directed to both you and Moving Aloha), moving across the country *can* be very scary, especially if doing it alone and not with family. Everyone's experiences in life are different; for some a move is nothing, but for others it is the psychological equivalent of stepping off a cliff. NJ to CA is a terrifying leap for many, and the culture shock will be enormous -- living in SD/La Mesa is different than visiting.

That being said, if the fear is based on thoughts like, "OMG, can I actually do this? Will I succeed?" You'll have to figure out some way to set those aside. Fears like that are going to creep their way into your head no matter what you're planning to do, so you have to learn to both soothe them and ignore them.

If the fears seem generated by the feeling that you're missing information, or an intuition-type feeling that something is not quite right, then that is something you need to listen to and investigate.
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Old 07-10-2012, 12:35 PM
 
Location: Central 858
601 posts, read 1,451,417 times
Reputation: 589
Check out Yelp.com. Lots of folks there in the same situation you're in, lots of interesting folks who are probably up for meeting new people and helping. Make connections there and see what happens.
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Old 07-10-2012, 02:31 PM
 
Location: San Diego
50,264 posts, read 47,023,439 times
Reputation: 34060
drive by
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