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That's very subjective, but I'd say you're being "too picky" if you tell yourself and others that you're looking for a partner, and you have a list of criteria you're looking for in a partner, and 1) you repeatedly date people who meet most or all of those criteria, but you always find some flaw that causes you to dump them, 2) your list of criteria is so long and detailed that the odds of your finding a person who meets them are slim to none, or 3) you don't possess comparable qualities to those you're looking for in a partner (i.e., you're looking for someone way out of your league). This goes on for years, and you always gripe that "there are no decent, available men (or women) out there."
Bottom line: I think that people who genuinely are too picky are either extremely self-centered or are terrified of a relationship and thus are subconsciously sabotaging themselves.
That said, you have every right to be "too picky" if you want to be. You'll also probably end up alone -- and there's nothing wrong with that, if it's what you truly want.
Location: somewhere close to Tampa, but closer to the beach
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standards are a must have..for everyone...and one should stick to them..but, when a woman tells a guy who is 5'9" that she could not date him when she is 5'0"..thats just off the hook...
I once knew a woman who made it clear that if her man did not wear the right shoes..she would not date him...hense i ran away as fast as possible...love my sneeks..
.............when the man is handed a questionaire on the first date.
Ummmm. . . .
Kidding lol.
I actually don't think I'm all too picky, but some of my male friends do. My main dealbreaker is attraction. I have to be attracted to the guy. Naturally, the attraction depends on a variety of factors, but there is no dead set list (with the exception of not dumb, pessimistic, overweight, or ignorant).
standards are a must have..for everyone...and one should stick to them..but, when a woman tells a guy who is 5'9" that she could not date him when she is 5'0"..thats just off the hook...
I once knew a woman who made it clear that if her man did not wear the right shoes..she would not date him...hense i ran away as fast as possible...love my sneeks..
I think a woman who would use height as an excuse in this situation is really letting the guy off gently. She's saying, hmmm... nah, not interested. I think that a good, date-able guy would see this and graciously bow out. I think a jerky, not so date-able guy would use this as further evidence that all women are picky and unreasonable and have such high standards and yadda yadda women suck blah blah blah, let me start a thread on city data to complain. If I were a woman who was 5'0", or h#ll, even 4'0", I wouldn't date this guy either .. he's too d*** short!
If you want a guy who's model good looking, drives a car, has a condo in the city, vacations in Europe frequently, but miraculously doesn't have to spend a lot of time working for all that money so he can spend it with you, you're too picky.
That's very subjective, but I'd say you're being "too picky" if you tell yourself and others that you're looking for a partner, and you have a list of criteria you're looking for in a partner, and 1) you repeatedly date people who meet most or all of those criteria, but you always find some flaw that causes you to dump them, 2) your list of criteria is so long and detailed that the odds of your finding a person who meets them are slim to none, or 3) you don't possess comparable qualities to those you're looking for in a partner (i.e., you're looking for someone way out of your league). This goes on for years, and you always gripe that "there are no decent, available men (or women) out there."
Bottom line: I think that people who genuinely are too picky are either extremely self-centered or are terrified of a relationship and thus are subconsciously sabotaging themselves.
That said, you have every right to be "too picky" if you want to be. You'll also probably end up alone -- and there's nothing wrong with that, if it's what you truly want.
Really good response.
I've have known women that have hand written lists of criteria numbering over 100 different attributes. GOOD LUCK!
In my life experience I am finding there that there is a good and bad to everything and everyone. Picking a mate I think just comes down to what you are able to accept in another person and I try to look at it as a balance beam with the good far outweighing the bad.
Being selective is great, but overly picky about things that matter little like shoe size or boob size or color of their eyes or that they like a certain type of music or enjoy fiction books is stupid.
If you want a guy who's model good looking, drives a car, has a condo in the city, vacations in Europe frequently, but miraculously doesn't have to spend a lot of time working for all that money so he can spend it with you, you're too picky.
Women are definitely guilty of it and men probably are as well, but I think media has fried our brains. As a society we have some unrealistic expectations of romantic partners not to mention everything else.
Can't tell you how many women I come across that believe men should have 5% body fat, six pack abs, the stylish bachelor pad, the "city" high paid do nothing job, the cool car, the cool wardrobe, the grand vacations, etc.
I think they've been watching too many movies and tv shows. Especially when I take into consideration their looks and presentation and accomplishments.
And there are men that have that but realistically unless they struck it rich with some internet company or had a trust fund from mommy and daddy, most likely they are self realized men aged 35-50.
Realistically 20 year old men or dudes I see are driving around in a boom box on crappy wheels, some old 15 year old Ford Mustang with a poor fitting body kit, their baseball cap askew, dirty holey jeans dragging to the ground and have $5 in their pocket.
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