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The problem is success is automatically tied to material things (I.E. money, clothes, house, car etc) and not necessarily tied to the other things that should matter (family, friends, spirituality, etc). Our society pre-occupies itself with the former and the latter is almost an afterthought.
Each person sets their own personal goals for success and strongly related to that...happiness.
People will judge other peoples success by thier own standards to some extent, recognizing also that people have their own goals. (Depending on how open minded they are.)
I know a guy I went to highschool with that makes little money as a mechanic. He has a tidy little house in a small town and has been married to his highschool sweetheart for probably close to 20 years now and she is frankly a "10" inside and out and they have a nice kid. I don't know many people more successful than him (or her).
That's us, minus the 20 years (7 only), and plus one more kid.
reaching your personal goals whatever they might want to be. could include things like finding a spouse you love, losing weight, buying a house, getting the promotion you wanted, etc.
i dont measure my success by others. my goal right now is to be clean and organized (i am a disorganized slob), and so far i have been unsuccessful lol.
Lots of discussion of those things. What defines a "NICE" job? One you're happy with or one you hate but you have career opportunity, high wages and status?
My dream job is NOT to work; live on the tropical beach in a hammock, and have playboy bunnies feed me grapes between orgies...
I make "good" money, I'm good with money, drive a nice car and have an attractive wife. The question: Am I successful?
Success can be summed up in one word, "yes." When one gets introspective and asks oneself the questions that define their own definition what embodies success, and can answer in the affirmative to the "Am I?;" "Did I?;" "Do I?;" and "Have I?" questions that enter the mind, then they are truly successful, regardless of any outward measure of the term.
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All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players: they have their exits and their entrances; and one man in his time plays many parts, his acts being seven ages.
~William Shakespeare (As You Like It Act II, Scene VII)
Thing is, if you know who you really are, without reservation, then you can and will achieve whatever your goals are. Besides, how can you define achievable goals without really knowing the person who set them?
Self delusions are the norm in todays society. I mean, when is the last time that you just turned off all the noise and set in silence for more than an hour? With so much going on, I don't think that most people really take the time to sit back and take in everything, much less to even begin to understand themselves objectively. What are your core values? What drives you to do what you do? Why do you love? I believe that once you figure these things out, and take time to understand them, the definition of success changes..
Then again, I am the pyschofreak here. I never take myself seriously..
Location: somewhere close to Tampa, but closer to the beach
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Overcoming obstacles..and challenges along the road..
Overcoming doubts, fears, and building from simple foundations..
Not fearing what others might say, or do to attempt to derail your ambitions and determined spirit..
Keeping strong and plugging on..
Achieving without steamrolling or using..lying or stealing
Calling upon your greatest strengths, talents, or gifts to help you achieve..
And sharing the fruits and rewards of your achievements with the world around you, and those within your world..as they come..for you are blessed to have been rewarded...
And at the end of each day, smiling back at the smile shining down upon you from above.. knowing that they are proud..
Creat short term (A few months to a few years) and long term (5+ years) goals. Do as much possible to obtain these goals but understand that if you "fail" that does not mean you are not successful.
These goals fuel our spirit and only an individual can gauge if they truly made an honest attempt to achieve them. If you understand why you've arrived at your current junction in life and can wholeheartedly admit that you've done everything possible to arrive here then it's safe to say you are successful.
1) Understand why you are the person you are
2) Create short/long term goals no matter how farfetched they may be
3) Do everything possible to achieve them
4) If you fail to achieve a goal make sure you understand why and take the experience as personal growth
5) Do the right thing
6) Love yourself (this one is the hardest) and love will find you.
I personally am not successful... Yet. For the most part I accept myself and know where I need to develope to become a better person. I've got a great job but it's not something I see myself doing forever. I'm sinlge and really don't want to be. Finding "her" is #1 on the list and raising a happy family is a close 2nd.
Beyond that I wake up with a smile 6 out of 7 days a week and have an amazing supporting cast that I love very much.
See, now as much as I'd like to define success strictly in touch-feely terms, I think there has to be a fundamental material level reached to be successful.
Otherwise, if feeling good about yourself and reaching your personal goals is all that you need to define success, then I would disagree. After all, you might feel pretty good about yourself living in your parent's basement at age 38, smoking weed and playing video games (I've known people like that). Or, you might feel pretty good about yourself even though you live in squalor and your children are neglected (Again, I've known a couple like that).
The entire reason for welfare reform 13 years ago was because huge numbers of Americans had figured out how to play the government for decades on end, getting a monthly check while making most of their cash under the table. You and I wouldn't be content living that way, but large numbers of people were perfectly fine with it, so long as they didn't have to roll out of bed at 7 a.m. and work a full-time job.
In short, success in able-bodied adulthood has to, at the very least, be defined as not being an undue burden to others. No, you don't have to own a Hummer (Who would, anyway?) or live in a mansion. But making your own way in life should be the minimal requirement.
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