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Chow, I think some people can become their own worst enemy. Or they become a self filing prophecy. Some folks, like me, are difficult people. I do feel bad for those who feel alone, isolated and have that hopeless feeling.
I am also someone who thrives on solitude. I can do human contact for a while. Alone time for me is a happy place for me. There are times when I love being in the breeze.
I have no interest in talking to people like myself because we all tend to agree. I have no interest in talking to the choir, boring..... those who challenge me and present new ideas are far more interesting then those who parrot what I say.
Tell me why far left progressive policies are good, why is gender conformity bad, why is the religious right wrong.
Why is gender studies so important? Why are gays evil, why is raising a child with religious beliefs so bad for the kid.....
Give me a reason that we can look at, that we can discuss and what we can do to make our society better.
Give me something to believe in......to quote Bret Michaels.
There is the rub. I do not want to get into politics. I have imbibed some whiskey. So, I might not have an option. The last four years had me shaking my head.
Then the topic of faith. That has been interesting journey for me. I have what I believe. I attend same church I was baptized in as a baby and later on confirmed in. Something my politics (as policies) and my beliefs conflict. It goes into the whole church and state separation thing.
There are a lot of dichotomies rolling around in my head.
There is the rub. I do not want to get into politics. I have imbibed some whiskey. So, I might not have an option. The last four years had me shaking my head.
Then the topic of faith. That has been interesting journey for me. I have what I believe. I attend same church I was baptized in as a baby and later on confirmed in. Something my politics (as policies) and my beliefs conflict. It goes into the whole church and state separation thing.
There are a lot of dichotomies rolling around in my head.
Life is one big dichotomy.
I've long since been envious of the believers. I've envied their sense of peace.
Whiskey and politics are indeed mutual foes, and kodus to you for the larger insight, I don't wanna bring politics into this forum, my last post aside.
I find rational discourse has much like Elvis, left the building. POC forum is nothng but tribalistic hacks.
I'm moderately desperate to have someone give me a snarky free opinion about X..........
I've long since been envious of the believers. I've envied their sense of peace.
Whiskey and politics are indeed mutual foes, and kodus to you for the larger insight, I don't wanna bring politics into this forum, my last post aside.
I find rational discourse has much like Elvis, left the building. POC forum is nothng but tribalistic hacks.
I'm moderately desperate to have someone give me a snarky free opinion about X..........
I start out of the cesspool that is POC. Part of me thinks I should study political science. It would make sense considering what I do and where I excel.
If I could go back 20 years I’d screw up my life in a whole different way. It is the whole butterfly effect.
I start out of the cesspool that is POC. Part of me thinks I should study political science. It would make sense considering what I do and where I excel.
If I could go back 20 years I’d screw up my life in a whole different way. It is the whole butterfly effect.
If I could go back 20 yrs...
How many George Straight songs say that.
To be honest and I've given these same thoughts from another post, my biggest regret as of now, I'm 51, is that I stayed in the same job too long. I was in role that I was in for 27 yrs. I stayed about ten yrs too long.
I'm smart, not really, but I'm smart enough to know that I'm not the smartest man in the room and that is smart enough.
To be honest and I've given these same thoughts from another post, my biggest regret as of now, I'm 51, is that I stayed in the same job too long. I was in role that I was in for 27 yrs. I stayed about ten yrs too long.
I'm smart, not really, but I'm smart enough to know that I'm not the smartest man in the room and that is smart enough.
I can’t complain about work. Now I am working on a system to staying organized and ahead of the curve of deadlines.
If I could have been a detective, that would have been a highlight for me. The older I get the more i like solving the mystery and reading people. One of the things I try to train new employees, when I was doing that sort of thing, was how to built a rapport. It may be for the wrong reasons at times. It is also a tool that will make unpleasant aspects more tolerable.
In 12 years I will be eligible to retire. If the last 12 years are any indication, it will go by fast.
I can’t complain about work. Now I am working on a system to staying organized and ahead of the curve of deadlines.
If I could have been a detective, that would have been a highlight for me. The older I get the more i like solving the mystery and reading people. One of the things I try to train new employees, when I was doing that sort of thing, was how to built a rapport. It may be for the wrong reasons at times. It is also a tool that will make unpleasant aspects more tolerable.
In 12 years I will be eligible to retire. If the last 12 years are any indication, it will go by fast.
You'll pour milk in your coffee in 12 yrs from now and wonder how it went so fast.
You'll pour milk in your coffee in 12 yrs from now and wonder how it went so fast.
Bookmark this post.....
I like my coffee black. But otherwise you are correct. Maybe it is some age. But my attitude has changed over the years. There are some things I will light up on and keep my foot in the throttle. Other things, eh. I let it go. I think that is comes with picking my battles.
*sigh* music...from the last page talking about music, yeah, I have gone down some Spotify rabbit holes lately, digging some nostalgia, listening to 90s tunes. Pepper. Pets. Standing by a phone booth something something can't remember the name of that song...blerg whatever. lol I have new stuff in my playlist. It's nice.
But Chris Cornell never left my rotation.
Watched a little documentary thing about Bill Hicks yesterday. Life is so capricious, he got clean and started talking about how we can and should do so much better as a society and cancer took him out so young. I wonder what he would think about the world today, I wonder that about others who are gone, and I wonder if it's kinder that they are no longer here, but I miss their insights all the same. We had a (masked) visit with a friend, and he does not quite share our politics, but we had good conversation with him. I sometimes think that the answer to what you guys are talking about, above, is in having those conversations in person and not online? I keep clinging to my belief that most of us are not crazy, most of us are reasonable people who just want life to be better, we want many of the same things, yet often disagree about how to get there, or if it's possible. Most of us do not want to be unkind, and want for everyone here to have a chance, just to live and make it and be OK. And have we all not thought about our life paths, and wondered what things could be like if we could change this, or that, could have taken a different turn at some point in the road, eh?
I thought about backing out of here for a while. I still might. I get to a point, where yeah, my issues are too much, too heavy, people want to give advice, and I appreciate the sentiments and desire to help, but the cycle of "person online gives advice, but doing that thing is harder than they think, they assume that there's a system to adequately handle these things and I just need to connect with the right resources and everything will be fine. But it's so much harder than that. But if I talk about how hard that is, I'm resisting advice. Seem to not want help or to change the problem, maybe I'm codependent. Maybe I keep people around me helpless because I need to be needed. I swear to god I do not. I want to run to another state and change my name, I did not ask for this." And then I find articles like these...
...and I'm like, yes, I feel this. I am not crazy or lazy or "codependent" for thinking that finding solutions is way harder than it should be. Get my kid "help" and get charged a fortune and nothing changes. It IS hard. And there is a system in this country that leaves people to twist in the wind. But we do what we can. (Actually yes, I AM codependent, but I've been doing my best for years to break from that, first I built boundaries with my Mom, then I left my Ex, but it's damn difficult to figure out how to free myself from this with my kid. I can't just stop caring about him, because our relationship is not "healthy" in some way.)
Anyhow. Don't want to get into it so much, I wanna shake it all off like a wet dog and get on with my day. I appreciate you guys. I get the good intentions, I'm receiving that signal, and I'm grateful.
*sigh* music...from the last page talking about music, yeah, I have gone down some Spotify rabbit holes lately, digging some nostalgia, listening to 90s tunes. Pepper. Pets. Standing by a phone booth something something can't remember the name of that song...blerg whatever. lol I have new stuff in my playlist. It's nice.
But Chris Cornell never left my rotation.
Watched a little documentary thing about Bill Hicks yesterday. Life is so capricious, he got clean and started talking about how we can and should do so much better as a society and cancer took him out so young. I wonder what he would think about the world today, I wonder that about others who are gone, and I wonder if it's kinder that they are no longer here, but I miss their insights all the same. We had a (masked) visit with a friend, and he does not quite share our politics, but we had good conversation with him. I sometimes think that the answer to what you guys are talking about, above, is in having those conversations in person and not online? I keep clinging to my belief that most of us are not crazy, most of us are reasonable people who just want life to be better, we want many of the same things, yet often disagree about how to get there, or if it's possible. Most of us do not want to be unkind, and want for everyone here to have a chance, just to live and make it and be OK. And have we all not thought about our life paths, and wondered what things could be like if we could change this, or that, could have taken a different turn at some point in the road, eh?
I thought about backing out of here for a while. I still might. I get to a point, where yeah, my issues are too much, too heavy, people want to give advice, and I appreciate the sentiments and desire to help, but the cycle of "person online gives advice, but doing that thing is harder than they think, they assume that there's a system to adequately handle these things and I just need to connect with the right resources and everything will be fine. But it's so much harder than that. But if I talk about how hard that is, I'm resisting advice. Seem to not want help or to change the problem, maybe I'm codependent. Maybe I keep people around me helpless because I need to be needed. I swear to god I do not. I want to run to another state and change my name, I did not ask for this." And then I find articles like these...
...and I'm like, yes, I feel this. I am not crazy or lazy or "codependent" for thinking that finding solutions is way harder than it should be. Get my kid "help" and get charged a fortune and nothing changes. It IS hard. And there is a system in this country that leaves people to twist in the wind. But we do what we can. (Actually yes, I AM codependent, but I've been doing my best for years to break from that, first I built boundaries with my Mom, then I left my Ex, but it's damn difficult to figure out how to free myself from this with my kid. I can't just stop caring about him, because our relationship is not "healthy" in some way.)
Anyhow. Don't want to get into it so much, I wanna shake it all off like a wet dog and get on with my day. I appreciate you guys. I get the good intentions, I'm receiving that signal, and I'm grateful.
And good music is a balm for the troubled soul...
I get it. I don’t like to give out a lot of personal information either, it’s hard to be vulnerable to some stranger who will later use it against you when you one up them in a debate about something unrelated! “Maybe that’s why you were a single mother! You’re an idiot.” or “Enjoy your cats you burn out!” ....
(when wait, did I say I tried weed in 8th grade.... wasn’t that like 2 years ago in a post about...ummm where am I...and why do I care...)
Comes with the territory’s of not being able to keep your smart mouth closed!
I think we all need a break sometimes.
DM me if you want to chat. I can’t seem to get kicked out. Over. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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I don’t like to give out a lot of personal information either, it’s hard to be vulnerable to some stranger who will later use it against you when you one up them in a debate about something unrelated! “Maybe that’s why you were a single mother! You’re an idiot.” or “Enjoy your cats you burn out!” .... 
