Becoming sexually involved early on: (male, advice, friend, couple)

[Londoncowboy30]

Originally Posted by JasperJade

Not to mention that my avatar--the little cartoon head beneath my name on posts--is the female one. It's not lit up because I don't have a profile picture, but still, it's right there.

[Oasiscakes]

Originally Posted by Faith2187

I agree with the beginning of your post but the end of it we will have to agree to disagree lol-ime there is such a thing as bad sex, sex cannot always be improved-even when you care deeply about the other, and some people can be compatible in many ways but lack chemistry in the bedroom, they can have different libidos, different levels of freakiness, be smaller than I prefer, etc. Sex is just sex, but like most things depending on the person it can be more or less complex, and complicated so that means that it can often be just as important as the other aspects in building a relationship foundation.

I personally am like you, and need to build a connection, and a relationship foundation of some sort with that person before I feel comfortable having sex with "said" man so I do wait to have sex and feel no regrets or reservation about doing so. I am secure with who I am, and I know my worth and value enough to understand that there are men that will see my value and worth and be okay with waiting until we both are ready and comfortable to get physically intimate. However even with this foundation, and the feelings I may develop, if the sex isn't good between us due to lack of sexual chemistry I will not be interested in progressing the relationship unfortunately.

Despite the fact that I wait to get physically intimate, I do try to have conversations and communicate about beliefs regarding sex etc to make sure we are on a similar page, I also have been crass enough to ask for d pictures since size is important to me lol. Usually making out and other activities that don't involve oral or piv give me a somewhat good idea about the chemistry between us.

I have to admit that I've never had the urge to f*** a man on a first date. Ever. It just does not happen. I have had urges on third dates and such but chose not to act because despite the urges I didn't feel comfortable enough or like i knew the man enough or understood our arrangement enough to feel that it was a wise decision for me. That's just me-understandably some guys moved on and later told me they assumed I wasn't interested because I didn't sleep with them. I did not feel bad because I wasn't invested yet.

Haha maybe I have been lucky then because most guys I've been with were slightly decent in that area. Although, like you, if they have a small d.. I don't know if I could live with that. I hooked up with a guy that literally had a micro-p and I definitely did not continue on with him after that haha.

Originally Posted by Leisesturm

You should. You should care quite a bit about the one's you let get away. One of them might have been 'him'. I admit a bias. I'll bet, however, that I have 20 years on you. I've met women of all kinds. Moreso than men, it is women who hit a dating wall at age 35 or 40, beyond which it takes active effort on their part to secure ongoing companionship with the opposite sex. It is also women, moreso than men, that are unable or unwilling to invest that kind of effort it takes, because they simply have no training or practice for it.

Lol, sorry to say but if a guy drops me because I don't sleep with him then he's definitely not the one.
As mentioned in my post before, I want to connect with someone on a much deeper level than just sexual so if he drops me because I won't sleep with him then we're both not on the same page with what we're looking for. I wouldn't want to date a guy that doesn't place the same values as I do, and that's one of the things I'd find out if we took the time to get to know one another.

[Akonyo]

Originally Posted by JasperJade

Nah. You aren't looking anything up because you know I'm right.

Okay, feminist, you successfully baited me into looking.

I could not find exact information on whether or not female promiscuity is linked to infidelity (neither can you though, as your one citation did not discuss this exact correlation either).

However, I actually have published research before (in unrelated subject matter, of course) so I may attempt to actually publish my own research on this matter.

The rest of your post will stand as something for you to come back and laugh about in a few years. Mark my words and you read it here first.

You can laugh all you want. The fact is that my views do not change easily. They have been present for years and will not change anytime soon (and certainly not to peer pressure).

In fact, I will be moving to my new location and starting a job on February 16, 2016. I will place bets that I will have found exactly what I'm looking for (as described in my earlier post) by February 16, 2017. One year's time.

And she certainly will not be a feminist with multiple past sexual partners. Absolutely disgusting. No way.

In the meantime, we can all enjoy the fact that you seem to have missed that I'm a woman.

I didn't miss that. Many feminists fancy themselves as men. So I figured that it wouldn't matter much to classify you as one.

[timberline742]

Originally Posted by Akonyo

I began creating an argument for this, but I don't feel like spending an hour looking through Google Scholar and trying to create an argument for something that won't provide me with any personal benefit.

If you guys want to take your chances with promiscuous women, have at it. Feel free to leave the women with less sexual partners for me.

You guys marry the promiscuous ones. I'll marry a pure one. We'll check back here in 20 years and see how our respective marriages are doing. Sound like a plan?

Also, for the record, I have absolutely no interesting in bowing down to feminism. It won't happen. I will not play into it (in my marriage or elsewhere) and I'm willing to go quite far to stick to these beliefs. The only exception to this is if the woman is worthy of this level of respect (physically attractive, feminine, good career, small amount of sexual partners that are confined to relationships).

Whether I get married or not, I have no doubt if I do, it will be more successful than yours because I don't see women as second class citizens and would never marry a woman that sees herself as a second class citizen.

I won't base, of course, who I marry or don't marry based on how many partners they have had. I'll base it on things that are actually important.

[stepka]

Originally Posted by Akonyo

You can laugh all you want. The fact is that my views do not change easily. They have been present for years and will not change anytime soon (and certainly not to peer pressure).

In fact, I will be moving to my new location and starting a job on February 16, 2016. I will place bets that I will have found exactly what I'm looking for (as described in my earlier post) by February 16, 2017. One year's time.

And she certainly will not be a feminist with multiple past sexual partners. Absolutely disgusting. No way.

Been readin too much Ayn Rand?

[Akonyo]

Originally Posted by timberline742

Whether I get married or not, I have no doubt if I do, it will be more successful than yours because I don't see women as second class citizens and would never marry a woman that sees herself as a second class citizen.

I won't base, of course, who I marry or don't marry based on how many partners they have had. I'll base it on things that are actually important.

Okay sounds like a plan. Let me know how your future promiscuous wife turns out for you and I will let you know how my future pure wife works out for me. I think you'll be surprised.

Originally Posted by stepka

Been readin too much Ayn Rand?

I've heard of her, but have never read her material. I may check her out sometime since, from what I hear, her viewpoints are pretty spot-on (though I can't provide my own analysis on whether or not this is true).

[In2itive_1]

Originally Posted by timberline742

Whether I get married or not, I have no doubt if I do, it will be more successful than yours because I don't see women as second class citizens and would never marry a woman that sees herself as a second class citizen.

I won't base, of course, who I marry or don't marry based on how many partners they have had. I'll base it on things that are actually important.

Good for you, T. How nice it would be if all would do this.

[timberline742]

Originally Posted by Akonyo

Okay sounds like a plan. Let me know how your future promiscuous wife turns out for you and I will let you know how my future pure wife works out for me. I think you'll be surprised.

The fact that you think sex makes a woman not "pure" shows your incredible contempt for women.

[Leisesturm]

Originally Posted by Akonyo

I've heard of her, but have never read her material. I may check her out sometime since, from what I hear, her viewpoints are pretty spot-on (though I can't provide my own analysis on whether or not this is true).

She sounds like a real piece of work, if you ask me... which you didn't. She was able to successfully negotiate an open marriage with her husband, mainly because her career success far eclipsed his. That should rule her out as a woman you could respect. I can't help but observe that you refer to your own marriage partner in the future tense. The single determinant of the likelihood of your achieving the rigorous specifications you have set for said marriage depend in large part on your present, and future, career success.

[Des-Lab]

I haven't had a sexual encounter of any kind in over two years.