Dealing with Relationship Problems: Key to Success? (Christian, wife, how to)
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6 years is not a huge span of time for dating--what is it with the deadlines everyone seems to have? Better to reject a hundred men than to marry someone only to divorce them a few years and thousands of dollars later.
Well this was the same girl that was crying because she hadn't had a boyfriend in 8 years (I didn't know her then) and then gets a good one and was bitching from month 2. Over every last thing. Then whined for the next year and change about not being able to find a good man. Meets another and he's nearly on the curb. And he's a helluva match from what I can see.
If she were happier single, then I wouldn't be as curious but she always seems miserable while looking for dates.
Well this was the same girl that was crying because she hadn't had a boyfriend in 8 years (I didn't know her then) and then gets a good one and was bitching from month 2. Over every last thing. Then whined for the next year and change about not being able to find a good man. Meets another and he's nearly on the curb. And he's a helluva match from what I can see.
If she were happier single, then I wouldn't be as curious but she always seems miserable while looking for dates.
Oh, you didn't know? Women are f*cked up in the head.
True but her reasons for dumping the last guy I did not understand. Basically, he adored her and would do anything for her but he liked staying in more while she wanted to be dressed up and go out more. And while he did go out for her sometimes, on the times when he wouldn't, she couldn't deal. I just think her tolerance for differences is incredibly low.
I dunno...that could be a lifestyle clash. Better to end it than deal with the crap that comes with it. That type of thing is kinda a biggie. A social butterfly and a hermit...ehhh..not a good match.
She sounds like she gets involved with the dating too fast instead of just knowing and having the friendship part long enough to pick them as a date or a friend.
What is her personal definition of a "good man"? I would ask her that. Its different for everyone.
ya dated guys who like to stay in a lot while I like to be out doing things. it definitely caused problems! I agree though that if someone has a tolerable flaw, then I would stick around if everything else was great.
What is her personal definition of a "good man"? I would ask her that. Its different for everyone.
Pretty much the same as mine. But it seems when flaws come up, she's out the door.
For instance she and I are friends with a larger groupd of females and we all get together and talk about the men in our lives. We all basically have the same complaints with our men (being homebodies, not being neat, eating all the food) but while we deal and move on, she's ready to dump.
I just don't get what flaws is she willing to deal with. We are all social people so we leave the men home and hang together. We just learn to work around things that she just has no patience for. Its just makes me wonder if she can't handle a relationship because conflicts always come up.
I think I'm a lot like your friend. My friends have told me that I'm too picky, that I don't give guys a chance and a few have said that I just haven't met the right guy yet. I think it has to do with being single for so long. I have a nice life. I have a good job, friends to hang out with, I volunteer, I work out and I participate in stuff. I'm also used to being on my own. So it's hard to adjust to being in a relationship with someone. I've dated a couple of really nice guys but I would be hanging out with them and thinking that I'd rather be doing XYZ with my friends or by myself and so I'd stop dating them. Even though I wasn't happy about being single (and i think a lot of that had to do with societal pressure rather than my own personal feelings), I was happier being single than being with either of those guys.
But I did get to the point where I really wanted male companionship for myself (and not just b/c I'm getting older and going to friend's weddings) and then I met someone I like hanging out with and stuff that annoyed me before don't annoy me with him. And I'm actually hoping it works out instead of looking for an opportunity to run.
Maybe it's the same with your friend. When and if she's ready, she'll be more accepting and open to working on a relationship instead of bailing.
Some people just aren't good at relationships. Or, maybe these guys seem like great guys to her friends, but the little quirks that surface when they are together are too much for her to deal with.
Pretty much the same as mine. But it seems when flaws come up, she's out the door.
For instance she and I are friends with a larger groupd of females and we all get together and talk about the men in our lives. We all basically have the same complaints with our men (being homebodies, not being neat, eating all the food) but while we deal and move on, she's ready to dump.
I just don't get what flaws is she willing to deal with. We are all social people so we leave the men home and hang together. We just learn to work around things that she just has no patience for. Its just makes me wonder if she can't handle a relationship because conflicts always come up.
I mean who has a conflict-free relationship?
Hmmmm...
See now I would have a problem with sticking with those things too. But there are a lot of guys out there that don't have those aspects. I would probably ask what she is willing to put up with though.
She may just want things in a slightly different way than you do. Maybe one of the key things she really wants is to have a guy to always go out with etc.
She and the world are better off if she remains picky and single versus the multitude of people out there that can't stand to be alone so they hop into a relationship with the first warm body they can find and ignore all the red flags.
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