Does anyone NOT believe in marraige? (cheat, children, American, spouses)

[Lucario]

Originally Posted by city_data91

Hugh Hefner is 84 and he's not attracted to old people

They're not attracted to him, either.......nor are young people for that matter.

[robertjohnson]

Originally Posted by dhanu86

Some people don't believe in marraige because they believe it contradicts our natural attractions to others. If it's wrong to be attracted to someone else besides your spouse, then theoretically you shouldn't be married. Is there anyone who can honestly say they aren't attracted to anyone else beside their spouse? Even a little? Even if it doesn't nearly amount to the attraction you have for your spouse?

Do you think happy life-long marraiges will become a rarer thing in the future? Today there are many divorces, unlike decades before.

Why do or don't you believe in marraige?

by the way I am in love with someone if you're wondering

If your asking yourself questions like that than your probably to young to get married anyway. Even in Arkansas. {Sorry Dutch}

Moderator cut: No bashing.

Look the only reason marriage has bad stats is because to many people are doing it. The wrong people. People that should be locked in cages. For those of us that get it marriage is effortless and guaranteed till death do us part. The rest of you are blind drivers that never should have been given a licence. Don't apply. You just give the rest of us a bad name.

[robertjohnson]

Originally Posted by *VaNiLlaGoRrilLa*

Why is that even necessary?

Your family isn’t going to be any less happy if you’re not married. I know an unmarried couple who have been together for over 25 years and they have 3 great kids.

Pardon me but do you want children to be less than they can be?
To earn less? To be less happy and emotionally stable? To have a higher divorce rate? jail - drugs - suicide See where I'm going with this?
Children from single or unmarried families suffer in EVERY measurable acheavment catagory in spite of your extensive research. Perhaps you should rethink your position.
And pick up a dictionary and look up the proper use of capitol letters.

[Donna in AZ]

An interesting fact: every culture has a ceremony for marriage and death. Even those never exposed to the outside world.

Civilizations are only successful if they place value on what works for us to thrive. Human interconnectedness is the key. Love & compassion bonds us.

Modern society has polluted the true meaning of marriage. Divorce/custody laws can be so punitive to one partner that there is no wonder they would not want to marry again. Also, societal pressure should not be a reason to get married but so many do.
Marriage is not the problem, we are.

[isaackko]

I don't believe in government recognition of marriage, but that's not the point you're going after at all

[Mooseketeer]

Originally Posted by robertjohnson

Pardon me but do you want children to be less than they can be?
To earn less? To be less happy and emotionally stable? To have a higher divorce rate? jail - drugs - suicide See where I'm going with this?
Children from single or unmarried families suffer in EVERY measurable acheavment catagory in spite of your extensive research. Perhaps you should rethink your position.
And pick up a dictionary and look up the proper use of capitol letters.

Funny because I know a lot kids from unmarried couples and they all seem to be well adjusted, intelligent, well educated and do not seem to have suffered any detrimental effects.



I live in Oxford where unmarried couples with children are incredibly common in the wealthy Academic community and I can assure you that they seem to achieve remarkably well both academically , economically, socially and emotionally.


The poorer parts of Oxford who also have unmarried OR married parents do a lot worse. I wonder what link there could be ?


Traditional" families seem to follow a lot of those socio-economic factors.



Intelligent, educated, well adjusted adults will mostly engender likewise children whatever their marriage status. The statistics you are looking at do not tell a whole story such as other circumstances affecting children's emotional and intellectual development. Socio economic factors for example.

Marriage is not a miracle cure. It will not make your child into a genius or an entrepeneur. What spurs kids on in life is stability, love, respect, a good environment and this can come in many forms. It can come within marriage and from outside it. I can come with single parents , Gay parents or Grand-Parents raising you, it can come from Foster parents or adoptive parents ,married, unmarried etc.... Love and stability oddly enough come from PEOPLE not pieces of paper.

I know many single parents whose kids are exceptionally bright, well adjusted kids. Their parents' marital status is NOT the factor which will change you from a stable successful kids into a failure.

I was brought up by a single Father and still managed to go to an Ivy League college and do pretty well.

Could it have been because my Father had certain values he inculcated into me, because of discipline, love, and also the fact that I had access to some of the best education there was, that I was nurtured intellectually and challenged, pushed and nudged into the right direction ? I think that was a pretty big part of it. Not because he was married or single.

I can assure you that had my parents stayed together I would have turned out vastly differently because my mother would have been about the most destabilising influence there was.

Do not look at statistics and try to make things fit your narrow definition of what success is . Numbers do not a whole picture make.
There are so many factors behind statistics that to try and generalise is simply intellectually disingenuous.


And if you are going to correct people about their use of "capitol" letters, perhaps you yourself could do with a dictionary as it is "capitAl" not "capitOl" unless you mean the letters are from the seat of State Legislature ?

Pot, Kettle anyone ? Mock and deride someone when your own backyard needs a little more scrutiny... How very hypocritical of you. Not a typo either I suggest considering how far the "A" is from the "O" on a QWERTY board.


I am sure you have achieved far more than I ever could , being raised by a single parent having made me ripe for a life of crime, jail, drugs, sexual promiscuity, a life of academic and intellectual failure, emotional maladjustment and presumably appalling spelling and use of capital letters as well as economic downfall ,perhaps we should compare notes ?

"Tooddle Pip", I have a joint to smoke , a bottle of Bourbon to finish and a Granny to rob.


Don't believe everything you think, it's dangerous .


PS: Feel free to correct my spelling, grammar and use of capital letters if it amuses you. One needs a hobby I guess.

[TKramar]

I don't see a point in it. If you're committed to another person, that should be enough for anyone. Marriage seems more a matter of legalities than anything else.

[tashie2005]

It seems like most men can not remain with one woman they're whole lives.

[personne]

Originally Posted by dhanu86

Some people don't believe in marraige because they believe it contradicts our natural attractions to others. If it's wrong to be attracted to someone else besides your spouse, then theoretically you shouldn't be married. Is there anyone who can honestly say they aren't attracted to anyone else beside their spouse? Even a little? Even if it doesn't nearly amount to the attraction you have for your spouse?

Do you think happy life-long marraiges will become a rarer thing in the future? Today there are many divorces, unlike decades before.

Why do or don't you believe in marraige?

by the way I am in love with someone if you're wondering

Before anything else, shouldn't the thread title say "does anyone don't believe in commitment or monogamy?"

Because I don't see the necessary link with marriage.

I'll read the rest of the thread now

[BabyBoomers2]

I think all of the people replying in this Thread should read our (wife/I) "bottom line" statement on page 4, reply #40!
From an "old man's" point-of-view, in a basically young adult Thread, nobody should be bashing marriage! Most people who "bash" marriage have either been in a bad marriage or known someone who has. So??? Does that mean YOU will marry and divorce?? Divorce happens!