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Well, that was pretty much what I was doing - in a PITA way, granted. OK, now I understand so far...
Understood. Hey, I'm on a roll! (and isn't it annoying I'm doing this again? )
Under most circumstances I'd like to think I would be, but there was just too much static in your earlier posts to hear the question. But now, the grand finale...
*sigh*
OK, here's the deal - I'll answer ONLY for myself; if you want to extrapolate from there to include all guys, have at it...my answer is...
...it depends.
It depends where I am in my life when I first meet you and hear those alluring words. If I happen to be harder than Chinese calculus at that particular moment, I'll take you up on pretty much any conditions you put down. (SEE: desperate, horny, genitally-driven, "small-head" thinking).
So in that case, fire away - I'll probably only hear every fifth word you say, anyway.
If I am somewhat more composed, I might take a step or two back and wonder if I'm face-to-face with a man-eater. Why? Perhaps because, in spite of all my kinks and weirdness, at heart I'm an old-school kinda' guy, and those types just can't wrap their heads around a woman who knows what she wants and has the balls to come out and say it.
I've had enough sex already in my life to make the late Johnnie Wadd envious, so you couldn't trap me with that. Again, I'm old-school - sex doesn't mean a thing to me unless there's something more there. I need that connection.
So in that case, again, fire away. But this time be assured that I'll be listening VERY closely, as well as reading your body language, analyzing what you DON'T say and performing a Vulcan mind-meld on you when you aren't looking.
Oh, the whole marriage thing? If we're just hooking up for sex, nope, not interested. If we click? Yes or no. I don't need it, but wouldn't mind going for Round 2 with the right person.
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It sounds like ya`all have worked this whole problem out!!!! Good Deal!!!
The question is if he is expecting that she will change her mind in the future.
And I have no idea about this specific guy. Some will accept it as it is, some will want to change your mind.
This is pretty much how I see it too, whether a male or a female. OP: there MUST be guys out there looking for a situation just like the one you want. I'm sure of it. There must be guys who would like company but don't want to get into something heavily romantic. I think it's 100% fine to state what you're looking for up-front.
If some guys leave because of it, it's just as well because those men would have eventually left anyway, only after, probably, some hurt on their part. So yes, for sure, state right off the bat what you're looking for. People have all kinds of situations. Being outside the "norm" shouldn't be so terrifying to people (and evoke such embittered, jibing responses). But you *are* outside the norm and unfortunately, not everyone is open-minded to a non-traditional, "Let's fall in love" scenario. Let those people fall off you like water off a duck's back, and keep looking for a situation/relationship that will make both you and your SO happy.
And if people want to reduce/belittle your situation into "obviously you're just an easy lay...of course somebody's going to say yes," remember that a) they may be speaking from their *own* experiences...not yours and b) ANY situation could potentially be belittled/made ugly like that. For instance, those of us who have or want to have children can easily be bitterly called "breeders". A woman who likes being taken out on dates could be called "a prostitute" (and has been, many times...at least on this forum ) because she's "exchanging" a paid-for experience for her company. A married couple could be barbed at as "straight-arrow" people who "felt they should do the status quo thing" and so on. ANY situation can be called ugly things by either jealous or bitter people. That doesn't mean *your* situation is ugly. Maybe it just means it's the perfect situation for you.
To answer your question: Different men have difference preferences. If your intentions in your relationships are for primarily sex, I think most men would be okay with that as long as they know in the beginning. You can telll them that bluntly or by behavior. However things can get messy if they develop feelings and you will have to end it.
To answer your question, I think many people, regardless of gender, would want to know the deal up front. But you know this already and it has already been answered. It seems you are more concerned with the reaction to the overall tone of your posts and I suspect this is exactly what you thrive on, the shock factor. It is attention seeking at it's finest.
I saw the title to this thread and immediately figured this to be another case of insolence and arrogance guised as honesty. This isn't really about the question you are posing as much as it is a platform to boast and be the tough guy.
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I do happen to be totally upfront at all times, no matter how callous it might sound.
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And yes this is what you get from me...........
And there's the proof in the pudding. Be wary of people who brag about how honest they are, "even if it hurts". Me, me, me.
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Originally Posted by swanstone1
To be honest my first one night stand was at 38. First and last. I happen to have no room emotionally for the men my age that seek "marriage second time around". I like my young guys, they don't ask/demand. I personally don't ask. Just wondered if mid 40s guys are just trying to change my mind
Two possibilities, they have either accepted your terms, or they are hoping you will change your mind. It is up to you to figure out which. No one person here can speak for all of mid-40's guys.
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cuz after all what mid 40s woman could possibly looking foir more than fun? Yes, that means all aspects of discovering life, not just sex.
Speak for yourself.
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Originally Posted by yankeegirl313
Why do you feel you are being attacked? You come on strong with your first post, so we come back as being "blunt" as well. We are just trying to help!
LOL....yep.
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Originally Posted by swanstone1
Love laughing at myself about you guys postings. It's just the first time someone my age asked me out. Always been married (21 years) and then went to boy toys. I think I'm too tired to try to form relationships and therefore just give my spiel that I've known and find safe/honest . Maybe a test? I Just ended up in a very remote STATE 8x the population of my last CITY and the men all want to get married! EEEK! I think it's just possible to just get tired of people.
You mean all the men you have talked to in that age group. I doubt all of them want to get married.
Ok, for lthe first time since I moved to my new state I've had a guy my own age ask me out. Allright first guy to ask me out since I usually call the shots. he's ok, but I kinda tell it like it is. I don't want to date, we can hang out, if I like you fine, I might just use you for sex, we can be buds, or it's not gonna fly. I always say I don't do the traditional bf/gf thing and have NO interest in it.
So, if a guy still wants to go out, is he secretely hoping to change my mind? Or be just used for sex? Curious since I really haven't had much to do with men my age in years.
In reading what Miss Lucky quoted, I noticed something:
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Originally Posted by swanstone1
Ok, for lthe first time since I moved to my new state I've had a guy my own age ask me out.
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Originally Posted by swanstone1
I Just ended up in a very remote STATE 8x the population of my last CITY and the men all want to get married!
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Curious since I really haven't had much to do with men my age in years.
You had one guy ask you out, apparently over 40, since he was your age. And, you haven't had much to do with men your age in years. But they all want to get married in this new remote state you live in.
To be honest my first one night stand was at 38. First and last. I happen to have no room emotionally for the men my age that seek "marriage second time around". I like my young guys, they don't ask/demand. I personally don't ask. Just wondered if mid 40s guys are just trying to change my mind cuz after all what mid 40s woman could possibly looking foir more than fun? Yes, that means all aspects of discovering life, not just sex. I do happen to be totally upfront at all times, no matter how callous it might sound.
So now that you are in your 40's you are feeling a need to discover life being untied is that right? If you have gone through some heavy relationships and feel that need now I don't see a problem with that except how you are communicating it. They way you are communicating it comes off as if you have a grudge.
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Good Deal!!! 
You come on strong with your first post, so we come back as being "blunt" as well. We are just trying to help! 
