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Take a deep breath...
Sure babies are born with different temperments and some babies are just easier than others, but I don't necessarily think this means Baby #2 is going to be a difficult toddler, kid or teen. If you only had this one baby and you didn't have "superbaby" to compare him to, it wouldn't all seem so miserable.
As hard as it is, try not to label him as the difficult one. Try, each day, to start with a clean slate hoping for the best. Some babies are just a bit more demanding and as they develop and learn new skills they become much more content. Really try to avoid preconceived notions - one of these days, he may surprise you.
All that said, please make sure there isn't some underlying medical problem going on. The most likely problem could be something like gastroesophageal reflux. All babies with reflux don't spit up. For many babies, acidic stomach contents just wash up and down the esophagus causing discomfort. Common symptoms include difficulty sleeping, irritability associated with meals, reswallowing, arching and general fussiness. Sounds a lot like your little guy. Often pediatricians will give a trial of an antacid such as Zantac. Please talk to your pediatrician some more.
Good luck, get some rest and help if needed!
Thanks so much for your suggestion! I called the doctor and explained the symptoms - eating small amounts, then screaming if you put him horizontal at all, waking up screaming soon after a feeding at night, etc. He said it sounded exactly like reflux and gave us a trial of medication, and suggested keeping him upright for 15 min. after feeding. He's already doing much better! Also having him sleep with his head elevated a bit seems to help. I'm working from home today (nanny is here) and there's been no crying at all, as opposed to the past week when he was crying/screaming on and off all day.
I think these posts prove that most people are who they are based on genetics. This is why even when we raise a child to the best of our ability, they can still grow up to make decisions that are totally contrary to how we raised them.
My kids are now almost grown, but keep that in mind as your kids become teens. It will keep you from absorbing guilt when they...well....are unrecognizable from the loving baby in your arms today.
Thanks so much for your suggestion! I called the doctor and explained the symptoms - eating small amounts, then screaming if you put him horizontal at all, waking up screaming soon after a feeding at night, etc. He said it sounded exactly like reflux and gave us a trial of medication, and suggested keeping him upright for 15 min. after feeding. He's already doing much better! Also having him sleep with his head elevated a bit seems to help. I'm working from home today (nanny is here) and there's been no crying at all, as opposed to the past week when he was crying/screaming on and off all day.
That's fantastic. I am so pleased to hear you are having positive results already.
One thing I wanted to ask is do you bottle or breast feed. As there are other options I found helped. I personally put my girls straight on formula but when twin 1 had her reflux problem I was told to put her on a thickened formula (Such as this:Rice Formula - Enfamil)
or use a thickener in the formula I already used. If you can't get a hold of these you can use a spoonful of rice cereal either added to the bottle or mixed up with a small amount of milk on the spoon & fed to the baby before breast feeding.
Great! I'm so glad that was helpful information. I am a nurse practitioner and see premature babies all day - it sounded like reflux to me. We recommend upright after feeds for 15 to 30 minutes. Avoid things like carseats or bouncy seats that allow the stomach to get scrunched up. You can elevate the head of the crib by putting something under the crib legs. They sell something exactly for that purpose at places like Bed, Bath and Beyond, but really super-large cans (like canned goods that someone might buy for a large group) will work well also.
Reflux tends to improve when babies begin eating more solid foods and gain better trunk control. Thickening feeds is very helpful if you are bottle feeding. Avoid all thin liquids like water (gets enough in formula or breast milk) and juice (acidic, sugary and void of all nutrition).
Keep your doctor posted. If things get worse the medicine may need adjusting. Good luck!
Great! I'm so glad that was helpful information. I am a nurse practitioner and see premature babies all day - it sounded like reflux to me. We recommend upright after feeds for 15 to 30 minutes. Avoid things like carseats or bouncy seats that allow the stomach to get scrunched up. You can elevate the head of the crib by putting something under the crib legs. They sell something exactly for that purpose at places like Bed, Bath and Beyond, but really super-large cans (like canned goods that someone might buy for a large group) will work well also.
Reflux tends to improve when babies begin eating more solid foods and gain better trunk control. Thickening feeds is very helpful if you are bottle feeding. Avoid all thin liquids like water (gets enough in formula or breast milk) and juice (acidic, sugary and void of all nutrition).
Keep your doctor posted. If things get worse the medicine may need adjusting. Good luck!
Thanks again. Yes, we have those things to raise the height of a bed that someone gave us so I put two on one end of the crib and put his head on the high end. We're also adding a teaspoon of rice cereal to formula to thicken it up. When feeding, I've found the best way to keep him upright is to put two of those horseshoe shaped boppy pillows on top of each other, then put him in the middle and feed him that way. He's even starting to hold his own bottle - very cute!
That's fantastic. I am so pleased to hear you are having positive results already.
One thing I wanted to ask is do you bottle or breast feed. As there are other options I found helped. I personally put my girls straight on formula but when twin 1 had her reflux problem I was told to put her on a thickened formula (Such as this:Rice Formula - Enfamil)
or use a thickener in the formula I already used. If you can't get a hold of these you can use a spoonful of rice cereal either added to the bottle or mixed up with a small amount of milk on the spoon & fed to the baby before breast feeding.
Keep us updated on the outcomes.
They're both on formula with rice cereal added to each bottle. The dr. said it takes a couple days for the medication to start working, but just keeping him upright is helping a lot.
It's amazing to see babies have such different personalities right from the start. My son wanted to be cuddled all the time. Wouldn't sleep for two months, unless it was in my arms!
My daughter on the other hand, wanted nothing to do with me, wanted to be put in her crib when it was time to sleep from day one!! She was a dream baby that slept through the night from the moment we brought her home from the hospital.
Does he have reflux? Is he lactose intolerant? Have you changed his formula? Have you used mylicon drops for gas? I don't know, every kid is different. We have a DD that was a "easy baby" too and the middle child(a boy) was always high maintenance and never slept well. In K-4 he was dx with ADHD. Then the 3rd child(another boy) was right in the middle. I think his deal is just being a boy. I think girls are more easy going but I ALSO have a twin whose DD was hell on wheels as a toddler. Good Luck to you! I know that crying can be very trying. Trust me, I had to call my hubby home from work to relieve me SEVERAL times.
Does he have reflux? Is he lactose intolerant? Have you changed his formula? Have you used mylicon drops for gas? I don't know, every kid is different. We have a DD that was a "easy baby" too and the middle child(a boy) was always high maintenance and never slept well. In K-4 he was dx with ADHD. Then the 3rd child(another boy) was right in the middle. I think his deal is just being a boy. I think girls are more easy going but I ALSO have a twin whose DD was hell on wheels as a toddler. Good Luck to you! I know that crying can be very trying. Trust me, I had to call my hubby home from work to relieve me SEVERAL times.
He's on medication now for reflux, and the dr. didn't think he sounded like he was lactose intolerant. We regularly use Mylicon too. I think a big part of his "difficulty" is that he still eats less than his brother, but more often. Before bed his brother will drink 8 - 10 ounces of formula, and he only drinks 3 or 4. So his routine is to get up around 2 a.m. to drink another 3 or 4 ounces, then he's up at 5 a.m. for another couple ounces. The 2 a.m. feeding isn't so much the problem as is the getting up between 5 and 5:30, because that's when we need to be getting ready for work. The nanny arrives at 7. I thought I had him settled and ok this morning by 5 a.m., but half way through my shower he started screaming! His brother normally sleeps from around 8 p.m. to at least 7 a.m..
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