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Geez, we were spanked as kids, there was 4 of us and none of us grew violent. We were well mannered, well behaved, respected our elders and would NEVER dream of speaking to our parents the way I have seen my grandkids talk to theirs.
I spanked my own kids when they needed it, I did NOT beat them up but spanked them on their butts when they misbehaved. They grew up to be well adjusted adults that are scared to death of their kids who run all over them because you go to jail now if you spank them.
I talked to one lady who had to send her son to live with his Dad because he threatened to call child protection services on her and claim she had hit him every time she told him he couldn't do something. The power is taken away from the PARENTS and given to the kids.... and people wonder what has happened to the kids today?
I talked to one lady who had to send her son to live with his Dad because he threatened to call child protection services on her and claim she had hit him every time she told him he couldn't do something. The power is taken away from the PARENTS and given to the kids.... and people wonder what has happened to the kids today?
One of my kids pulled that one time. I never spanked my kids, but one of them was upset when I grounded him and he said -- half jokingly -- we learned in school today, that if you're mean to us, we should call CPS and report you. I walked over to the phone and handed it to him and told him that would be fine with me, because if CPS came, they would take him away, and put him in a foster home. I would be here in my own home, watching my TV, eating ice cream, and enjoying our backyard pool, while he was in some stranger's house, with no room of his own, no TV, no pool, etc. That was the last time he mentioned calling CPS! lol
As a parent, I find this bill terrifying. Do we really want to go down the road of the government legislating parenting decisions? Because that is what this is. Child abuse is already illegal, so any spanking taken to the point of leaving bruises or doing severe physical damage is already against the law. You may think that spanking is not good parenting, but if we start outlawing things because some people think it isn't a good parenting decision, where does it end? Poor food choices in childhood are linked to obesity, juvenile diabetes, and a shorter life span. That is clearly not in the best interest of the child. Should we make it illegal for kids to consume chips? Or eat more than X number of calories per day? Early TV viewing has been linked to autism, ADHD, and poor academic achievement. Should we make that illegal, too?
In my opinion, this is an instance of government WAY, WAY overstepping its bounds. Leave it to me to decide what is best for my own children.
Good job. I hope folks here in the States will one day follow suit. The only sad thing about this, from my point of view, is that they have to initiate a law for what *should* be common sense.
(*drags out her soapbox*) Hitting children -- hitting anyone -- is (in my opinion) wrong. I've said it before and I'll say it again. Hitting does not teach discipline, it teaches violence. It reinforces a notion that violence is a reasonable method of resolving conflict. If you hit an adult, there is a good possibility you'll be arrested (or at the very least, smacked back). Yet, there is a free-for-all when it comes to smacking children. It's just wrong. (*steps off soapbox... for now...*).
Go, Canada!
You're right! I think they need to pass a law against yelling at your kids or saying anything that would upset them since it might damage their self esteem and teach them that yelling is ok. I also think we need the government to step in and arrest those parents who take their kids to a fast food place instead of making what they eat. Surely that's child abuse since most of those meals are filled with horrible stuff. Then you have christmas, I think the government should step in again and arrest those parents who give their small children bikes or any riding thing under the child endangerment laws. Surely you should know that a child is almost certain to fall and get hurt!
At what point to we give up our rights on how to parent our children to the government? How do we expect them to know anything better, just look at the mess they make of almost everything they touch!
How 'bout a law that allows the arrest of parents who's "little darlings" run rampant or destroy things because the parent is busy saying over and over "stop doing that now please or I'll put you in the naughty chair" instead of applying a swat after the 10th time?
Or arrest the parents who's little darlings scream at the top of their lungs through out the store and instead of taking them outside and letting them know very fast that's wrong just act oblivious instead?
Or my favorite, how about a law that allows the arrest of parents that let the little cutie run around the theater or restaurant while the parent explains why the little dickens shouldn't do that or threatens and scolds instead of again, after the 5th time taking them outside and getting to the "seat" of the problem?
You see, soap boxes come in many sizes and varieties and one is no better than the other, it just depends which one YOU like and want to buy into.
Jimj, from reading some of your other posts, it appears you and I agree on a lot of things. Seems we disagree on a lot, too . I can't remember if you are a spanker or not, but it seems you're against laws against spanking.
Believe it or not, I am, too. That's why the second sentence of my post lamented that it would have to take a law to address what, in my opinion, should be common sense. I'd love for all parents to actively parent their children. Parenting, in my opinion, includes teaching self-discipline. There are many ways to discipline and teach self-discipline other than hitting. In my opinion, hitting only teaches that it is ok to hit people with whom one doesn't agree.
I know it is fruitless to try to dissuade hitters. Hitters will justify their actions every time. "It isn't abuse, it's just a swat". "I'm not beating, I'm just spanking". "I have a right". "It's in the Bible". People who hit will continue to do so. Those of us who don't, won't start. I doubt either side will ever convince the other to change.
As far as taking things to the extreme (government dictating every aspect of how one raises a child), of course that's ridiculous. I'm sure you were just using hyperbole to make your point. Heck, if most parents were actively engaged in parenting their children, we wouldn't even need to have this discussion .
I think we all have a defined line of what is "spanking" and what is "child abuse." Even though they may differ from person to person on which number of the "swat" is the transition... or what is the pound per square inch of force that stops becoming discipline and starts becoming abuse.
But for those naive individuals who think a child's mind works like an adults and can focus (for the complete 5 minutes they are on timeout) I have to roll my eyes. We have an obligation to teach our children that the world is full of laws... and that when laws get broken, there are consequences. The judicial system in America (as seriously flawed as it is) is not going to say "oh... you stole the car because you couldn't afford a new one.. well .. go sit down for 10 minutes and think about what you did!" or "I understand... you killed him because he made a face at you... well.. that's a no, no! Go sit down and think about what you did for 10 minutes then you can play again."
We are raising children in an atmosphere where punishments no longer fit the crime and it's now actually worth the punishment to commit the crime. This won't go over well when they break the law in real life... I'm just waiting for the defense "well.. I was never taught there were real punishments... I just had to sit down for a 10 minute 'time out' growing up!" Remember, Canadian courts recently through out a "grounding" to a school event when a father tried to punish his 12 year old daughter. Not only will they not respect us, they will not respect authority.. then we'll wonder why the percentage of crimes (per capita) is rising in this country.
I'm not about beating children in ANY fashion... and anyone who does deserves the most severe punishment available. And I know there will be people who post past mine who will use my words or twist the spirit of what I said. But to say "no more corporal punishment" is the wrong answer.
"Time out" for my kids was the time of the backswing to the time of impact on their bottom.
Jimj, from reading some of your other posts, it appears you and I agree on a lot of things. Seems we disagree on a lot, too . I can't remember if you are a spanker or not, but it seems you're against laws against spanking.
Believe it or not, I am, too. That's why the second sentence of my post lamented that it would have to take a law to address what, in my opinion, should be common sense. I'd love for all parents to actively parent their children. Parenting, in my opinion, includes teaching self-discipline. There are many ways to discipline and teach self-discipline other than hitting. In my opinion, hitting only teaches that it is ok to hit people with whom one doesn't agree.
I know it is fruitless to try to dissuade hitters. Hitters will justify their actions every time. "It isn't abuse, it's just a swat". "I'm not beating, I'm just spanking". "I have a right". "It's in the Bible". People who hit will continue to do so. Those of us who don't, won't start. I doubt either side will ever convince the other to change.
As far as taking things to the extreme (government dictating every aspect of how one raises a child), of course that's ridiculous. I'm sure you were just using hyperbole to make your point. Heck, if most parents were actively engaged in parenting their children, we wouldn't even need to have this discussion .
To answer your question we did spank some. Usually no more than a couple of swats on the bottom but all that stopped when he was about 8 or 9 because it stopped having the desired result and we switched to other tools. Now at 16 he gets sent to his room and a long discussion on what he's doing wrong.
I am not in favor of beating a child as I've seen some parents do and have had done to me as a child but let me say that I've also received spankings (from step parents) that I fully deserved and were corrective. There are children that will respond to verbal correction and some that will respond to physical correction and it's our job as parents to figure out what works best and when to use which tools. I don't believe in any assistive devices to apply the spanking since I think a parent should "feel" what they're doing so it won't get out of hand as it were.
The point of what I wrote above was to show exactly what kind of lunacy can happen if the government gets involved with raising children, it's not their role and will only end up causing more parents to abdicate their responsabilities when it comes to rearing their child.
I was spanked as a child. and most of the time I deserved it. My view on spanking is it should only be use as a last resort, if everything else fails, instead of resulting to spanking half the time the child misbehave. But I wouldn't criminalize spanking at all.
In disciplines i would say be gentle, but firm, know that u need business.
I wouldn't let any government raising any kids out there, it is the role of the parents.
Isn't this the same country that overturned a parent's decision to ground his child?
This is one of those moments where I'm glad I don't live in X Country. I just hope that America does not follow suit.
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. I can't remember if you are a spanker or not, but it seems you're against laws against spanking.
